Workshop about the chapters To Employers, A Vision for You and Dr. Bob's Nightmare at the Spiritual Awakenings group in Bernardville, NJ

The Mets, you know what I mean.

If he speaks of his home situation, you can undoubtedly make help a helpful suggestions. Can he talk frankly with you? So long as he does not bear business tales or criticize his associates with this kind of employee, such an attitude will command undying loyalty. The greatest enemy of US Alcoholics are resentment, jealousy, envy, frustration and fear. Wherever men are gathered together in business, there will be rivalries and arriving out of these, a certain amount of office politics. Sometimes we Alcoholics have an idea that people are trying to pull us down.

This is not so at all. But sometimes our drinking will be used politically.

I usually don't tell my employers that I'm an alcoholic. Synonymous.

I the places where I've been working, I don't trust

their understanding of it to a point where they won't look down on it or look on it as a weakness. But there are certain people in my businesses that I let know, and usually those are the people where I could be helpful later on down the road,

like where I work now, they may know I'm an alcoholic. They don't know it from my mouth. But there's, there's, there's one, there's two people on campus where I work that no, I'm an alcoholic. One of them is somebody that works there that's also in the program. And the other is, is the school psychologist.

And we, we let her, my wife and I let her know early on that we were in Alcoholics Anonymous because she calls on us to get speakers for the school. We're able to, to take certain students to meetings. So it's, it would be almost a crime not to tell her, but she's responsible enough to understand and to keep, keep my anonymity. I'm certainly not going to tell my boss I'm an Alcoholics Anonymous. I mean, if there's any hope for a promotion that would go out the window with me saying that,

you know, let me. Because he's just not the type of person who would understand

each case is different. Each employee employment environment is different. You just use, need to use common sense. And one of the things I, I kind of discourage is somebody getting sober and with two days sobriety running in and telling everybody that they're an Alcoholics Anonymous. That's that's almost like the person breaking their anonymity at the level of press, radio, TV and film and then going out and drinking.

I mean, you break your anonymity in a work environment and you go back out drinking. You make us look bad. You know, the hell with you. So there'll be somebody going, oh, yeah. So and so went to a A and for about two months and he's drinking like a fish now. It must not work, you know what I mean? So you have to, you have to be conscious of that. You you, you know, help us with with anonymity in certain situations.

You know what I mean? And and be

consider it before you break your anonymity. 1 instance comes to mind, in which a malicious individual was always making friendly little jokes about an alcoholic's drinking exploits. In this way, he was slightly carrying tails. In another case, an alcoholic was sent to a hospital for treatment. Only a few knew of it at first, but within a short time it was billboarded throughout the entire company. Naturally, this sort of thing decreased the man's chance of recovery.

The employer can many times protect the victim from this kind of a talk.

The employer cannot play favorites, but he can always defend a man from needless provocation and unfair criticism. As a class, Alcoholics, our energetic people, they work, they work hard and they play hard because we don't come in on Monday, we make up for it on Tuesday. Now we we're, we're hardworking people. Your man should be on his metal to make good, but somewhat weakened and faced with physical and mental readjustment to a life which knows no alcohol. He may overdo. You may have to curb his desire to work 16 hours a day.

That's something that they didn't have to do with me, I'll tell you.

You may need to encourage him to play once in a while. He may wish to do a lot for other Alcoholics and something of the the sort may come up during business hours. A reasonable amount of latitude will be helpful. This work is necessary to maintain his sobriety. After your man has gone along without drinking for a few months, you may be able to make use of his services with other employees who are giving you the alcoholic run around, provided of course, they are willing to have a third party in the picture.

An alcoholic who has recovered but holds a relatively unimportant job can talk to a man with a better position. Being on a radically different basis of life, he will never take advantage of the situation. Your man may be trusted. Long experience with alcoholic excuses naturally arouse suspicion. When his wife next calls saying he is sick, you might jump to the conclusion that he is drunk. If he is and is still trying to recover, he will tell you about it, even if it means the loss of his job, for he knows he must be honest if he would live at all. What a great line that is.

He will appreciate knowing you are not bothering your head about him, that you are not suspicious nor are you trying to run his life. So he will be shielded from temptation to drink. If he is conscientiously following the program of recovery, he can go anywhere. Your business may call him again. They they talked about this in the chapter Working with others. If you, if you've got a reasonable amount of time in recovery and you still have problems

with business meetings and restaurants where they serve liquor,

we're going to cocktail parties where you have a valid reason to be there. If you still have problems with that, you've got to for shit program. And, and that's just the way it is. There's there's something that you're just not working on. Now, every once in a while we can get a little uneasy in a drinking situation and we can, you know, we know enough to get out of there. But if, if you, if, if you're the type of person who just can't be anywhere near it or you, you start to freak out. Now you got a hole in your program, and you need to find it and work on it.

In case he does stumble even once, you will have to decide whether to let him go. If you are sure he doesn't mean business, there is no doubt you should discharge him. If, On the contrary, you are sure he is doing his utmost, you may wish to give him another chance. But you should feel under no obligation to keep him on, for your obligation has been well just discharged already.

There was another thing you might wish to do. If your organization is a large one. Your junior executives might be provided with this book. You might let them know you have no quarrel with the alcoholic of your organization. These juniors are often in a difficult position. Men under them are frequently their friends. So for one reason or another, they cover these men, hoping matters will take a turn for the better.

They often jeopardize their own positions by trying to help serious strikers who should have been fired long ago or else given an opportunity to get well. Today we have departments and larger companies, human resources, and for the most part, these people are well versed in in what type of things, what type of actions they should take to send somebody to get help.

After reading this book, a junior executive can go to such a man and say approximately this. Look here Ed, do you want to stop drinking or not? You put me on the spot every time you get drunk. It isn't fair to me or the firm. I've been learning something about alcoholism. If you are an alcoholic, you are a mighty sick man. You act like one.

The firm wants to help you get over it. If you are interested, there is a way out. If you take it, your cast will be forgotten and the fact that you went away for treatment will not be mentioned. But if you cannot or will not stop drinking, I think you ought to resign. That's a That's a good way to good way to put it.

Your junior executive may not agree with the contents of our book. He need not and often should not show it to his alcoholic prospect. But at least he will understand the problem and will no longer be misled by ordinary promises. He will be able to take a position with such a man which is eminently fair and square.

He will have no further reason for covering up an alcoholic employee.

It boils right down to this. No man should be fired just because he is alcoholic. I think it's even illegal now, you know, because they, they recognize it as a disease, weird things. If they catch you drinking, they can fire you. But if you're drunk, they can't fire you. Like crazy things like that. But I mean, I don't know from personal experience because I've always worked for places. If they want to fire you, they're firing you. God damn it, you know, but but I've heard of a lot of stories about

especially Postal Steve.

He told me you can just be as drunk as a goat, but if they catch you with a bottle in the truck, that's different. You can be fired, but you can be drunk out of your mind doing rounds.

You know, it's like it's tied up with the law.

I was wondered why I got everybody else's mail but mine.

If he wants to stop, he should be afforded a real chance. If he cannot or does not want to stop, he should be discharged. The exceptions are few. We think this method of approach will accomplish several things. It will permit the rehabilitation of good men. At the same time, you will feel no reluctance to get to rid yourselves of those who cannot or will not stop. Alcoholism may be causing your organization considerable damage in its waste of time, men and reputation. We hope our suggestions will help you plug up the sometime. Seriously,

we think we are sensitive when we urge that you stop this waste and give you a worthwhile man a chance. They used to do this too with their 12 step prospects. If you weren't, if you didn't have an honest desire to stop drinking, the hell with you. They'd ostracize you back in the early days, you know, I mean, you really had to have a desire to stop drinking. Today it's, it's well, it's OK, well and fine. And just walk into an A, a meeting and sit in the back for years and years and years and stay miserable.

But they wouldn't let you do that in the old days if you weren't willing to go through the steps.

They didn't want you in their meetings, you know, And that's just the way it was

The other day. An approach was made to the vice president of a large industrial concern. He remarked a mighty glad you fellows got over your drinking. But the policy of this company is not to interfere with the habits of our employees. If a man drinks so much that his job suffers, we fire him. I don't see how you can be of any help to us, for, as you see, we don't have any alcoholic problems. The same company spends millions for research every year. Their cost of production is figured to a fine decimal point. They have recreational facilities. There's company insurance. There is a real interest, both humanitarian and business

and the well-being of employees. But alcoholism, well, they just don't believe they have it. Perhaps this is a typical attitude. We, who have collectively seen a great deal of business life, at least from the alcoholic angle, had to smile at this gentlemen's sincere opinion. He might be shocked if he knew how much alcoholism is costing his organization a year. That company may harbor many actual or potential Alcoholics. We believe the managers of large enterprises often have little idea how prevalent the problem is.

Even if you feel your organization has no alcoholic problem, it might pay to take another look down the line.

You may make some interesting discoveries. Of course, this chapter refers to Alcoholics, sick people, deranged men. What our friend the Vice President had in mind was in the habitual or or whoopie drinker. As to them, his policy is undoubtedly sound, but he did not distinguish between such people in the alcoholic. It is not to be expected that an alcoholic employee will receive a disproportionate amount of time and attention. He should not be made a favorite. The right kind of man, the kind who recovers will not want this sort of thing.

He will not impose. Far from it. He will work like the devil and thank you to his dying day. Today, I own a little company. There are two alcoholic employees who produce, produce as much as five normal salesman. But why not? They have a new attitude and they have been saved from a living death. I've enjoyed every moment spent in getting them straightened out. Tonight I'm going to start on page 151, Chapter 11, A Vision for You.

For most normal folks, drinking means conviviality, companionship, and colorful imagination. It means release from care, boredom and worry.

It is joyous intimacy with friends and feeling that life is good. But not so with with us. In those last days of heavy drinking, the old pleasures were gone. They were, but memories. Never could we recapture the great moments of the past. There was an insistent yearning to enjoy life as we once did and a heartbreaking obsession that some numerical of control will enable us to do it. There was always one more attempt and one more failure.

What took place in my drinking experience was there was a period of time when when alcohol did for me what I could not do for myself.

Alcohol set me free and it was the absolute wonder tool.

It it it it brought me of age, you know what I mean. From the time I was about 16, I was, I was a heavy drinker till the time I was about 19. Alcohol, I mean there was a lot of problems. It was I crashed many cars, got many DWI, embarrassed myself many times, but they were a small price to pay for what how alcohol set me free. Alcohol enabled alcohol was the great fear antidote for Cruz, the anti Chris medication, you know what I mean?

And I could go to a party and I could be larger than life. And after I was 20, it wasn't working like that anymore. It was just causing a lot of problems. And very rarely would I get that that sense of ease and comfort that I got in the early days. Yet I chased after it like a demon, even to the last days of my drinking. When I cracked the the cap of that bottle,

I really thought that somehow, someway, I could regain some of that peace

and and contentment that alcohol brought me in the early days. But it was, it was elusive. I never could recapture it, but it was an obsession. It was an obsession in my mind to try to do so.

The less people tolerated us, the more we withdrew from society, from life itself, as we became subjects of king alcohol, shivering denizens of his mad realm, the chilling vapor that his loneliness settled down it thinking ever becoming blacker. Some of the sort out sword places hoping to find understanding, companionship and approval.

I used to go to the cafe in Morristown, down by the train station.

If anybody ever drank there, that's a sward place. Well, momentarily we did. Then would come oblivion and the awful awakening to face the four hideous horsemen, terror, bewilderment, frustration and despair. Unhappy drinkers who read this page will understand now and then. A serious drinker, being dry at at the moment, says I don't miss it at all. Feel better, work better, having a better time

has X problem drinkers. We smile at such a Sally. That's like the person who comes into a A is sober about a week and says, you know, everything's great, everything's real. You know, I don't need your steps. You know I don't need to make coffee.

My life is just wonderful. We smile at such a Sally. We know our friend is like a boy whistling in the dark. To keep up his spirits. He fools himself inwardly. He would give anything to take take half a dozen drinks and get away with them. You meet these people in the beginners meeting over in Marysville. He will presently try to. He will presently try the old gain again, for he isn't happy about his sobriety. He cannot picture life without alcohol. Someday he will be able to unable to imagine life either with alcohol

or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping off place. He will wish for the end. I have been at that jumping off place and I have wished for the end. And it was probably the best thing that ever happened to me because it established to the core of my being my first step understanding.

We have shown how we got out from under. You say, yes, I'm willing, but am I to be consigned to a life where I shall be stupid, boring and glum like some righteous people? I say, I know I must get along without liquor, but how can I have you a sufficient substitute? Yes, there is a substitute, and it's vastly more than that. It is a fellowship in Alcoholics Anonymous. There you will find release from care, boredom and worry. Your imagination will be fired. Life will mean something at last. The most satisfactory years of your existence lie ahead.

Thus we find the fellowship, and so will you. And I certainly relate to this too. My whole thought was the last place in the world I was going to come is Alcoholics Anonymous. You know, the the home of the Lane. You know what I mean? Like, why don't you just shoot me and put me out of my misery? I'm going to have to sit in church basements the rest of my life and talk about God. Just kill me and get it over with. You know, it would be a merciful death. And that's really how I thought.

And for the first couple of months in AAA, it was like, it was like taking a bitter pill. It was like swallowing Castor oil to go to meetings. But I'll tell you once, once I started to put in, once I started to bring 2, the whole thing changed. And I'll tell you what, a meeting really is the highlight of my day. Now I've got a great group of meetings that I go to. I love every one of them. I look forward to the people I see there.

I I love observing the insane drama of all my my sponsees. You know

what they're getting in trouble with today? It's really, it's, it's interesting and, and I love it. It gives meaning to my life.

How's that to come about, you ask? Where am I to find these people? Remember, this book was written to be sent out upon the tides of alcoholism throughout the country in the world. And there were only two meetings at the time of of the printing of this book. So he's expecting people in Peoria to read this and not know what the hell he's talking about.

So here's an explanation. You are going to meet these new friends in your own community. These are instructions near you. Alcoholics are dying helplessly, like people in a sinking ship. If you live in a large place, there are hundreds, high and low, rich and poor. These are future fellows of Alcoholics Anonymous. Among them you will make lifelong friends. You will be bound to them with new and wonderful ties. For you will escape disaster together, and you will commence shoulder to shoulder your common journey. What a great group of promises we've read on the last

I mean, forget about it. Then you will know what it means to give them yourself, that others may survive and rediscover life. You will learn the full meaning of love, thy neighbor as thyself.

It may seem incredible that these men are to become happy, respected, and useful once more. How can they rise out of such misery, bad repute, and hopelessness? The practical answer is that since these things have happened among us, they can happen with you. Should you wish them above all else and be willing to make use of our experience, we are sure they will come. The age of Miracles is still with us. Our own recovery proves that.

And how could he be sure? Faith, that's how he could be sure. Because there was only two groups and Doctor Bob and Bill Wilson were really the, the leaders of those groups. They started them. So how, how could they really know that this would happen on a on, on a wholesale scale across the board and there would be 4 million Alcoholics in recovery in 1999. You know they didn't, but they certainly had faith that it would happen.

Our help is that when this chick of a book is launched on the world tide of alcoholism, defeated drinkers will seize upon it to follow its suggestions.

Many, we are sure, will rise to their feet and March on. They will approach still other sick ones, and fellowships of Alcoholics Anonymous may spring up in each city and hamlet, havens for those who must find a way out. This is the vision Bill Wilson had on his hospital bed during his last detox. He came to the conclusion that Alcoholics could help other Alcoholics, and thank God that he did. Because look what we have today. I know, I know, my ass has been saved by it.

In the chapter Working with Others, you gathered an idea of how we approach and aid others to help. Suppose now that through you, several families have adopted this way of life. You will want to know more of how to proceed from that point. Perhaps the best way of treating you to a glimpse of your future will to be to describe the growth of the fellowship among us. Here's a brief account. Years ago in 35, one of our number made a journey to a certain western city.

That be Akron. From a business standpoint, his trip came off badly.

He had been successful, and if he had been successful in his enterprise, he would have been set on his feet financially, which at the time seemed vitally important. But his venture wound up in a lawsuit and bogged down completely. The proceeding was shot through with much hard feeling and controversy. Barely discouraged. He found himself in a strange place, discredited and almost broke, still physically weak and sober but a few months. He saw that his predicament was dangerous. He wanted so much to talk with someone, but whom?

On a dismal afternoon, he paced a hotel lobby.

Mayflower. Mayflower Hotel Bill Wilson story if anyone doesn't recognize it. Wondering how his bill was to be paid.

The poor guy didn't even have money to pay for his his hotel room. Poor, poor guy. At one end of the room stood a glass covered directory of local churches. Down the lobby a door opened into an attractive bar. He could see the gay crowd inside. In there he would find companionship and release. Unless he took some drinks, he might not have the courage to scrape up an acquaintance and would have a lonely weekend.

You know, that's how we think. Well, I'm going to have to take a drink or else I'll never be able to ask what's your name on a date? Or I'm going to have to take a drink, or I'll never be able to deal with these people.

Of course he couldn't drink, but why not sit hopefully at a table, a bottle bottle of ginger ginger ale before him. After all, had he not been sober six, six months now, perhaps he could handle, say, 3 drinks. No more. Fear gripped him. He was on thin ice again. It was the old insidious insanity, that first strength. With a shiver he turned away and walked down to Lyle, to the lobby, to the church directory. Music and gay chat are still floated to him from the bar,

but what about his responsibilities, his family and the men who would die because they would not know how to get well?

Ah yes, those other Alcoholics.

There must be many such in this town.

He would phone a clergyman. His sanity returned and he thanked God. Selecting a church at random from the directory, he stepped into the booth and lifted the receiver. His call to a clergyman led him presently to a certain resident of the town who, though formally able and respected, was then nearing the nadir of alcoholic aspirin. Of course, that was Doctor Bob. What they don't tell you in this, though, was he had a certain number of nickels in his hand. And that really was all the money this guy had left.

And

what he did was he placed a bunch of calls and a lot of the people he talked to, how he approached it was I'm a rummy from New York and I need to talk to another rummy or else I'm gonna drink.

And most of the time all he heard was the dial tone after he said that. But he got ahold of this one guy, Walter Tunks, who, who put him in, in in touch with a number of people from from the Ashford Group. And one of them was Henrietta Cyberling. And she, and she was the person that that he finally called. And she understood, because she'd been going to Oxford group meetings with Ann and Bob Smith, hoping against hope for a a, a divine miracle to allow Bob Smith to get sober.

Bob gets over. So in her mind, she said this, this must be, this must be from God, this must be a message from God. I'm going to hook this guy up with Doctor Bob. And that's what happened. It was the usual situation. Home in jeopardy, Whiteville children distracted, bills and arrears and standing damaged. He had a desperate desire to stop, but saw no way out, for he had earnestly tried many avenues of escape. Painfully aware of being somehow abnormal, the man did not fully realize what it meant to be.

Call it when our friend related his experience. The man agreed that no amount of willpower he might muster could stop his drinking for long. A spiritual experience, he conceded, was absolutely necessary, but the price seemed high upon the basis suggested. He told how he lived in constant worry about those who might find out about his alcoholism. He had, of course, the familiar alcoholic obsession that few knew of his drinking. Why, he argued, should he lose the remainder of his business only to bring still more stuff into his family by foolishly admitting his plight to people from whom he made his livelihood?

He would do anything, he said. But that Doctor Bob was a proctologist and it was already a joke at the hospital that if you went to Doctor Bob, you were betting your ass

'cause you never knew how he was, how he was going to be when he was cutting on that puppy, you know what I mean? So he had already been down to probably 1 operation a month was all he was getting anyway and and he thought nobody knew about his drinking.

Being intrigued, however, he invited our friend to his home sometime later and just as he thought he was getting control of his liquor situation, he went on a roaring Bender. For him, this was the spree that ended all sprays. He saw that he would have to face his problem squarely that might that God might give him mastery. In other words, there were certain aspects to the Oxford Group form of spiritual awakening exercises.

Basically what it was was there were exercises to give your will and your life over to Jesus Christ.

And this is what they were doing in the auction group. And

Doctor Bob was unwilling to go make a minutes. He was unwilling to knock on the doors of the people he had wronged or harmed through his behavior. He thought that I'll do I'll, I'll make coffee. I'll go to 90 and 90, but I ain't making amends, OK? And this is what Doctor Bob was saying. And what happened was

an Atlantic City convention came up and he decided that I, I've got this is for my career. You know, I have to go. I have to go to Europe on a wine tasting expedition, you know, with 30 days.

You know, I have to do that for my family. You know, that's the way we think. You know, it's important. I'm an important guy. So off you went to Atlantic City. And I and the oral history is he didn't even make it to Atlantic City. He made it to the bar car and the train and they had to like, shovel him off somewhere. And you know, he was so drunk.

But anyway, here's what Doctor Bob did.

Here's the last action he had to take to complete his house cleaning. One morning he took the bull by the horns and set out to tell those he feared what his trouble had been. He found him surprisingly well. He found himself surprisingly well received and learned that many knew of his drinking. Stepping into his car, he made the rounds of people he had hurt. He trembled as he went about, for this might mean ruin, particularly to a person in his line of business. At midnight he came home exhausted but very happy. He really never did a hell of a lot of of of butt operations in recovery. I mean,

there's not a lot of evidence to show that he

of butt operations in recovery. I mean, there's not a lot of evidence to show that he his practice rebuilt itself. As a matter of fact, quite the opposite. He had to get money from a A to to pay for the mortgage on his house because like Bill Wilson, he really started to dedicate his life to Alcoholics Anonymous and helping other Alcoholics. And he never really did regain any kind of decent livelihood.

Neither really did Bill Wilson.

He had not. He has not had a drink since. As we shall see, he now means a great deal to his community and the major liabilities of 30 years of hard drinking have been repaired in four. But life was not easy for the two friends. Plenty of difficulties presented themselves. Both saw that they must keep spiritually active. One day they called up the head nurse of a local hospital. They explained their need and inquired if she had a first class alcoholic prospect. Yes, she she replied, yes, we've got a Corker. He's just beaten up a couple of nurses.

This is Bill Dotson. He goes off his head completely when he's drinking, but he's a grand chap when he's sober, though he's been here eight times in the last six months. Understand, he was once a well known lawyer in town, but just now we've got him strapped down tight. He was a prospect, all right, by the description, none too promising. The use of spiritual principles in such cases was not so well understood as it is now. But one of the friends said, put him in a private room and we'll be down. Now, this scared the hell out of the guy, OK. Because back then

hospital you never got a private room unless you were dying. If you were going to die, they put you in a private room so you could have a little bit of peace while you checked out. So this, this guy thought he was dying when they put him in the private room. 2 days later, a future fellow of Alcoholics Anonymous stared glassly at the strangers beside his bed. Who are you fellows and why this private room? I was always an award before said one of the visitors were giving you the treatment. A treatment for alcoholism.

Helplessness was written large in the man's face as you replied. Oh, but that's no use. Nothing would fix me. I'm a goner.

The last three times I got drunk on the way home from here, I'm afraid to go out the door. I can't understand it. How many times have we seen people get drunk on the way home from detox?

I mean, it just happened last Friday night.

So Mary Beth and some people took someone into a detox,

and they were drunk within 12 hours of being released from the detox. So I mean, that's, you know what? This kind of stuff happens for an hour. The two friends told him about their drinking experiences. Over and over. He would say, that's me, That's me. I drink like that. The man in the bed was told of the acute poisoning from which he suffered, how it deteriorates the body of the alcoholic and warps his mind. We know more about this now about how it deteriorates the body, the pancreas and the liver, how it breaks down our ability to metabolize alcoholism

and how once once we're at a certain point in alcoholic drinking, there is no turning back. There's no no regaining the control you had in high school. It's never going to happen. And the mind, I mean, we all know what happens about that. Some people when they go back out in a very short period of time, a lot of shit happens, you know what I mean? And a lot of insanity comes back like pronto in high gear. And we also see that happen.

It was much talk about the mental state proceeding, the first strength, like the obsession of the mind. Why do we pick up a drink when it's completely insane for us to do so? What? What type of logic do we use?

Yes, that's me, said the sick man, the very image. You fellas know your stuff, all right, but I don't see what good it'll do. You fellows are somebody. I was once, but I'm a nobody now. From what you tell me, I know more than ever I can't stop. At this post of the visitors burst into laugh. Said the future fellow anonymous. Damn little will laugh about that, I can say. The two friends spoke of their spiritual experience and told him about the course of action they had carried out. They talked about the steps, the 12 steps as they were back in the Oxford Group

time, how they they repaired the past, how they did the inventory, how they seek guidance, how they've turned their life over to God, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

He interrupted. I used to be strong for the church, but that won't fix it. I've prayed to God on hangover mornings and sworn that I'd never touch another drop, but by 9:00 I'd be boiled as an owl. Next day found the prospect more receptive. He had been thinking it over. Maybe you're right. He said God ought to be able to do anything. Then he had it. You should. He sure didn't do much for me when I was trying to fight this booze racket alone. On the third day, the lawyer gave his life to the care and direction of his Creator and said he was perfectly willing to do anything necessary.

This is something Doctor Bob would make you do on your knees in front of whoever was there at the time. You would have to get down and turn your will in your life over to the care of God. This, you know what this did? This filtered out the bullshitters, you know what I mean? If you weren't willing to get sober, you, you know, really willing, you weren't going to be doing that. His wife came scarcely daring to be hopeful, though he though she thought she somehow

saw something different about her husband. Already

he had begun to have a spiritual experience. That afternoon he put on his clothes and walked from the hospital a freeman. He entered a political campaign, making speech speeches, frequenting men's gatherings, places of all sorts, often staying up all night. He lost the race by only a narrow margin. But he had found God, and in finding God he found himself. And it's a good thing he didn't he. He didn't make any major changes in the first year,

you know, because within a week he was running for mayor or something like that, and he almost won. He went on the alcoholic ticket.

But the thing was, he had had a spiritual experience. OK, He had had a spiritual awakening because back then they took you through the steps fast, fast, hard and thorough. And he was safe and protected from the first ring as long as he followed a few simple rules. That was in June 1935. He never drank again. He, too, has become a respected and useful member of his community. He's helped other men recover and is a power in the church from which he was long absent. So you see, there were three Alcoholics in that town who now felt they had

others what they had found or be sunk. After several failures, failures to find others, a fourth turned up. He came through an acquaintance who had heard the good news. He proved to be a devil may care young fellow whose parents could not make out whether he wanted to stop drinking or not. What the heck was this guy's name? This guy ended up marrying Doctor Bob's daughter. The first the first case of of the Ernie. You're right, it was the first case of the 13th step.

Doctor Bob made a really big error.

His daughter Sue was going out with this, this nice young chap that they didn't really feel was appropriate for her.

So Doctor Bob said, why don't you spend some time with Ernie, who was like 12 years older than she was. She was, you know, just a teenager. This guy Ernie who, who is this, this devil may carry young chap. That's a that's a nice way of putting he was a bum. And why don't you spend some time with this Ernie guy? And sure enough, she spent some time with Ernie. She ended up marrying him and he just ruined their life. You, you read her autobiography

and it's just filled with bitterness toward this guy and toward her father for even even pushing him in in in her way, even though I wasn't drinking.

Oh, he picked back up. He relapsed very, very quickly. And then he was drunk for the next 20 years of the marriage.

His parents were bringing him to meetings and saying you're going to meetings. And he. So that was another case of being there for the wrong reasons.

Uh, they learned right away that your parents dragging you into the meeting does not willingness make.

Anyway, they were deeply religious peace people, much shocked by their son's refusal to have anything to do with the church. He suffered horribly from his sprees, but it seemed as if nothing could be done for him. He can send it, however, to go to the hospital where he occupied the very room recently vacated by the lawyer. Oh, just some good news about that, about Sue and Ernie. She finally threw the bomb out and married the guy that she was seeing back in high school. And today they're happy as hell. They're like in their 80s or something.

Anyway, he had three visitors. After a bit, he said the way you fellas put the spiritual stuff makes sense.

I'm ready to do business. I guess the old folks were right after all. So one more was added to the fellowship. All this time our friend of the hotel lobby incident remained in that town, Bill Wilson. He was there three months. He now returned home, leaving behind his first acquaintance, the lawyer in the Devil May Care Chap. He just left his wife alone in New York City for three months working at the department store. I swear, I swear. But thank God he did. You know

these men had found something brand new in life, though. They knew they must help other Alcoholics if they would remain sober.

That motive became secondary. It was transcended by the happiness they found in giving themselves for others.

They shared their homes, their slender resources, and gladly devoted their spare hours to fellow sufferers. They were willing by day or night to place a new man in the hospital and visit him afterward.

They grew in numbers. They experienced a few distressing failures. Once in a while somebody dropped dead that these guys were treated. One of Doctor Bob's favorite remedies was sour crap juice. He would like fill you up with sauerkraut juice. And he also had like this knockout medication. What what the heck? My memories like failing me tonight. But it was like this super heavy duty narcotic and he would knock you out for like 3 days on this stuff. And every once in a while, somebody would just drop dead with one of their treatments.

And you know, that's how they learned what to do

manslaughter.

Who knows?

Every once in a while, yeah, they drop dead right in Doctor Bobs house. Well, he was a doctor, so I'm sure he could cover it up.

The experience a few distressing failures, but in those cases they made an effort to bring the man's family into a spiritual way of living that's relieving much of the worry and suffering. Well, your husband didn't make it, but why don't you, why don't you come to the meetings? A year and six months later these three had succeeded with seven more seeing much of each other's scarce and evening pass that someone's home did not shelter a little gathering of men and women happy in their release and constantly thinking of how they might present their discoveries. Some newcomer in addition to these casual get togethers, it became customary to set apart one night a week for

to be attended by anyone and everyone interested in a spiritual way of life. And that became our open meeting. Aside from fellowship and sociability, the prime object was to provide a time in a place where new people might bring their problems. Outsiders became interested where new people can bring their problems. I, I always, I always find it hard to deal with where people are 20 years sober or 10 years sober and they use a, a like a garbage dump. They just come and they, they puke up all