Steps six through nine at the San Diego Intergroup's Serenity Retreat in San Diego, CA

I'm a compulsive overeater and a miracle of mental health. My name is Roy L Into Serenity first. Just yeah. We're going to start the meeting, as we did last time, with a serenity prayer. God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Well, I want to welcome everyone back to the San Diego Serenity Retreat.

And you guys didn't miss much during the 1:00 to 4:00 because we didn't have too many people here. But I was just answering personal questions on some step work and maybe a little men's and maybe a little background.

I will try and either e-mail Richard or whatever

with all of the footnotes and bibliography for all these sources when we'll take the the sign in sheet and e-mail you all as many sources as I can get from him for this, for the Slide City show,

this

I did. A lot of the people here are and one of the things I have to say about OA is they're really open to the basic text working the original program. They're open towards the message put out by people that I hang out with in Santa Monica,

which includes this nest of savage Big Book thumpers who like to call themselves the Fellowship of the Spirit Groups.

And a lot of you already have experience with the Big Book Awakening Step Guide, which Dan S puts out. I got a bunch of them here.

Ryan helped me carry him in. Would you do it? I don't know. Oh yeah. I don't make any money on them. They 7 bucks on If you go to bigbookawakening.org, you can order them from Dan S for 7 bucks. But I told him, look, I'm going down to this retreat. I had a bunch at the OA birthday party book study. I said they they were interested. So I

I said if you want give me a box and I'll give it to him for discounted price of 6 bucks. Just save the dollars and you don't have to wait for him to come in the mail. If you're not interested, don't worry, I don't make any money off him. Dan S was basically writing down,

you know, the the basic way of taking somebody through the steps. And I do this for OA any and I do for Al Anon's too,

using the original program. It works on any of our character disorders which are known as the addictions. It works on overeating. If your drug of choice is pizza or ice cream. It works on alcohol. If you. It works on narcotics, it works on cocaine. It works on sex and love addiction. It works on compulsive gambling. It works on Al Anon's too. And it's basically

using what I call, I'm gonna, I call myself not a fundamentalist because that always has an implication I'm doing it right. And you're doing it wrong. You know,

I call myself an originalist. It's just the word I made-up. Because fundamentalism has this kind of negative connotation of a kind of judgment and and self righteousness, which is the last thing you want to portray to a newcomer. It's not an attractive thing.

All I'm saying is that this is the original program and it works for me. You can do anything you want. You can use the OA workbook, You can go through the steps. We were talking, I was talking with one of our members with the Wally patents back to basic. He's an A guy that's trying to recreate Clarence Snyders old methods in the early 40s when he was taking 200 people a week through the steps in a week. You know

you can do anything you want and you can do what your sponsor tells you to do.

And that's one of the greatest things about 12 Step program is nobody can tell you what to do and nobody really

has any power of anybody else. And anybody who's telling you I'm doing it right, you're telling you're doing it wrong, you can tell them to piss off. I mean, that's one of the greatest things that we can't excommunicate anybody or expel anybody. You're a member. If you say you are

the people who started this thing back in 1935,

after 4 1/2 years decided, well, you know, we got a treasure. We made contact,

I think would be good if we told other people about it and they debated how to do it and they had to basically three main ideas and and they all thought money would be involved. One of them was a bunch of trained missionaries who were experienced in the step work to go across the country and take people through. A second was a string of detox units, usually staffed by members who knew what they were doing. And they would be paid and they would charge people.

And of course,

they should have a book, you know, and all three organizations or enterprises that rather thought they would, would require money. And they tried to raise money and they were absolutely unsuccessful.

The only thing that could come up with that they might still be able to pull off was a book.

And they decided to write this book.

And we heard earlier

the way the message was delivered word of mouth and it can be delivered word of mouth. But they decided that, you know, if you're gone for on a treasure hunt, you can give directions to the treasure verbally, but maybe be better to have a treasure map, right? So they decided that we need a treasure map. And that's what the big book is. It's if I do what's in here, I'm going to get make contact with a higher power,

OK. And the original message

is spiritual in nature.

OK.

Do you want the lights back on for this Roy, or are you going to be using the the space again?

Lights can be back on for the point for this.

Where the hell is it?

Um,

oh, it's in there as a solution to wonder I'm in the wrong.

Well, let me look for it because I'm not anyway, these

this is where you can get the oh, a podcast, including some book studies done by myself in Harlan at the owe a birthday party. It's on the virtual speakers Bureau. This is where you hear a lot of guys who are dedicated to working the steps through the book and it's XA stands for cross addictive. We got and a a tapes. But in the a a speaker section in the workshops, you'll see guys like Joe and Charlie. You'll see,

you see Don Pritz, Don P, you'll see Bob, oh, Bob Olsen, you see people, trust me, anybody is getting on this website, they're very familiar with how to work the steps as outlined in the book. This is a step that also has some real pioneers, guys like Clarence Snyder and Bill Wilson. A lot of Taste by Bill W Couple talks by Abby, the guy who delivered the message,

and they're from Oh, did did. How did it go off? He turned it off again.

We're gonna. You're gonna e-mail it to everybody? Yeah, we're gonna send it by e-mail. All right. OK. It'll come back on the second anyway. Right. I actually, I need it, kind of. I'm going to shift to be back to being back on right now. Frankly, let me. I'm sorry to make Richard go through. I thought it would have been an easy way to mute it or something. Like you can turn it off and on.

Let me get my big book up here.

Alright, alright, How do I get to the?

How do I get to the top of the OK?

I don't know how to do this. I thought there'd be a control that would do it.

Come on. What is this? Oh, I see what's happening here. Let me get this closed

all right.

I don't know a graceful way to scroll to the top.

I'm searching for this. What is the message here?

The original message.

What? Oh, here it is.

I'm going to search on the word personal.

I think it's in

all right.

In our personal stories you find a wide variation, the way each teller approaches and conceives of the power which is greater than himself. Whether we agree with a particular approach or conception seems to make little difference. Experience has taught us that these are matters about which, for our purpose, we need not be worried.

The book is about

how we made contact with a higher power,

and it starts with

the first step. OK, it starts with the forwards and the preferences, which is kind of the history of the program. But the first step has more pages devoted to it than any other step

in the book.

Because as Bill Wilson later says, you know, in the 12 and 12, even these desperate low bottom cases had difficulty accepting the

the the absolute hopeless nature of their situation. OK, the fact that they were were doomed. The message of the big book is that you're doomed. So my my theme for the

oh a retreat was it works. It really does. What program are you working?

Because you may not be hearing the original message of the program of recovery in your meetings. You may be hearing wonderful things and I'm going to play the this the

the slogans slapper thing again. Yeah, here we go.

This is funny. I couldn't get in touch with my sponsor. I was struggling. This is funny. I called everyone in my network and everyone on the meeting with. I reached out. I couldn't connect

with anyone.

Sometimes you just need an ear. Sometimes just need words.

Sometimes you just need a recovery slogan.

The Slogan Slapper

Introducing the greatest change to self help recovery since the invention of self help recovery. A slogan slapper is a spiritually engineered club designed to smack the shit out of all struggling and whining attics. No matter what your addiction is. Don't feel like going to meetings? Meeting makers, Make it.

Try the slogan slapper.

Feeling like shit? Feelings ain't fat.

The slogan slapper is made of fine leather and is handmade by recovering newcomers who want about having nothing to do. It becomes programmed with most recovery slogans used today such as Fake it till you make it, easy does it but do it. You need a check up from the neck up. Nothing changes. Nothing changes. Call your sponsor, Keep coming back and many others.

Don't be so self-centered. Go slogan, slap others as well.

Sick and tired of being sick and tired. Willingness is the key.

More will be rebuild.

This too shall pass. I'm grateful for the slogan slapper. I slapped the shit out of myself this morning and I know I'll stay clean. Just for today,

be a part of the solution and let the slogan slapper slap the shit out of you.

Did you like that? These guys are funny?

Well, there's a lot of stuff, great stuff on the Internet. Moly, moly. I think I did that. I just stepped on my self here. Yes. I hope I didn't. Whoa. Yeah. So that's done for a moment. Oh, really? Do we need sound anytime soon? Not really, I don't think.

Actually, we don't. Yeah. All right.

So so the original theme of the workshop is it works

well. What program are you working?

And you heard a lot of the slogans Meeting makers mating. Make it right. Well, I was going to two meetings a day, seven years in, you know, and I was dying. OK,

more the two biggest misquoted slogans in in Overeaters and on the NAA 2 the two misquoted misquoted from the book. The 1st is newcomers are the most important person in the room.

That is not in any 12 step literature that I know. Maybe it's in Samoa literature, but the actual quote from the book is frequent contact with newcomers and each other is the bright spot in our lives, you see. In other words, I don't believe anybody's more important than anybody else in this program. I don't. I'm not more important than a newcomer that might not be abstinent struggling,

but on the other hand, I don't think she's any more important than me, frankly.

And who's the one that's in danger? You know, if the newcomers in a pink cloud or in a state of grace and is on fire with the program, they might be farther away from the next compulsive bite than somebody 20 years in who's dying, who needs to go through the steps again. And they don't. They got page 52 in their life. They can be the one who's really in danger. Nobody's more important than anybody else in the program.

The newcomer becomes important to me. When he comes up to me and says, hey, I'd like to go through the steps, can you help me? Then he becomes very important to me. But you know, people come and go in the program. Nobody's more important than anybody else.

The other slogan that is most misquoted More will be revealed. It doesn't say that. It says see to it that your own house is in order. God will disclose more to you and to us. You see, the original message is that this is a spiritual program.

People are going to.

Let's see if I can find this damn thing. It says

in their own words and from our own point of view. We, we, we, the the great fact is that we've made contact with a higher power. OK. The original message of the program is I've had a spiritual awakening. It doesn't even mention food or, or alcohol in the 12th step. This is I've had a spiritual awakening from the result of these steps. And Oh, yeah, by the way, I haven't been obsessed with food for over 30 years.

But that's almost like a byproduct. It's like a side effect. It's a natural result. It's a precipitate of the solution. Pardon the chemical metaphor.

So that's the original message. So what message are you hearing in the Fellowship and what mess? And what's the what is your method? What is your solution for your compulsive overeating obsession? My solution is the original program. That's why I call myself the originalist. Anybody I know who wants to do it any other way is welcome to do it.

But The thing is

in Harlem, experience a little bit of this. Out in Scottsdale,

if you keep talking about the book and quoting from the book and this and that, you know you're going to get some feedback and not all of it's going to be positive. Because if a person never had experience with the original program,

they're not gonna admit to you, well, you know, I've never really had experience. So I just, I'm gonna indulge myself with contempt prior to investigation. They don't say that. What they're gonna say, you know, the best defensive good offense is that there's a bunch of Nazis running around this program with a big book telling us what to do. And that's bullshit. I'm telling you just opposite. If, if what you're doing with your sponsor is working for you, keep doing it.

You know, if it's, it's about calling in food and I go to my meeting and I got my commitment and that that and you, you can kind of gives you it gives you the OA workbook or whatever

you're doing it and it's working for you. Keep doing it. It's a totally non judgmental morality. It's not about who's doing it right or wrong or who's doing it the best or I'm doing it God's way and you're, you know, whatever it's about what's working for you. It's a total functional program approach. The book says we or bill says in his story, I was given a practical program of action. You know what practical means It means, never mind the theory. Is it working for you?

And that's the real question. If I'm seven years into this thing, abstinent, sober and I'm dying, something ain't working. And I needed to go through this process. I, I was telling the people during the the one to four period, there weren't too many.

You know, I had a first sponsor in a almost killed me because he didn't have experience with the book instead of admitting like I've never really made the amends and had a spiritual awakening and he, he was sober 17 years. He would just tell me, wow, you know, I know more than Bill. He only had 4 1/2 years when he wrote the book. And I swear to God,

I go to how do you do the six and seven step? Well, it's hard to explain. And I come to what we're talking about a men's where there were a few people here during the one to four period when we mostly got a chance to talk about some personal approaches to inventory and amends.

And I go to him, I go to him with an amend. He said, well, you don't have to make them.

When somebody tells you that here's what it really means. I never did the immense and I'm still on the program. He might they might be abstinent 10 years and but if they didn't do it, they're not going to insist that you do it because that would admit that they didn't do it right. They're not going to say that though. They're not going to say I never really had the experience of making the amends and having the awakening and he would say that you don't need to do to you man.

No sponsee of mine ever gets told that because I had my spirit. When I went through this step process again geared towards the book with my second sponsor, Kurt B in Boca Raton, FL was a good guy and believed in God. And I saw those resentments leave me

and I realized the book was right all along. And this clown with a 17 years and his opinions was full of shit. And that's what was wrong with me. That was a spiritual awakening of the educational variety and I've been a book guy ever since. OK, So what I what I discovered was that this simple program is outlined in the book really works. It really works. But if what you're doing is working for you and you and and you and you don't want to do this for whatever reason,

because it's too annoying to cross out alcohol and put in food or because it's dimensions the word God or uses the old chauvinist language him, You know, I say take the white on cross. If you got a female higher path, cross out him and put in her. I don't care. You know, you got to find something that works for you. But frankly, OA people are open to the book process because they see the results. But it's real hard to get somebody who's 25 years sober

and the only thing that kept him from drinking or killing himself was Prozac and still scoffing at God and just going to meetings and hanging out in the fellowship. And yeah, yeah, but I'm 25. It's real hard to get them to admit that they ain't got shit for a program, OK? And I'm certainly not going to go up to them and say that, although I might think that. And, you know, But the truth of the matter is that this thing really works. And if people don't have experience with it,

they're they're more ready to, you know, good defenses, good offense is the best defense.

You know, I'm not telling anybody what to do. And I'm not saying it's the only way to do it and or even it's the best way to do it for you. But I'm saying that this is the original way of doing it. It worked for me when the when that slogan kind of fellowship based, you know, working one side of the triangle type of program was not working for me. And it works for countless others

and the OA people are very open to it.

This is my outline from the Big Book workshop.

I don't know how much I'm going to be able to get through this thing. Well, that's what qualification

and I just mentioned about the difference. Some of the slips I slept, some of the slogans I think are complete bullshit like, you know, work a step a year and all that. They came from the New York a thought

meetings makers make it. I don't think it's valid. I think you got to get your butt to a meeting to be exposed to the higher power and hear the message. You know, it's a very spiritual act to walk into an OA meeting when you're a newcomer, then hold up your hand. That's a spiritual act and say for the first time I'm a compulsive overeater. That's a spiritual act and take it a welcome chip. That's a spiritual act, you know, but that. But when you are attending meetings at a fellowship, you're in the presence

of some of the people who have had a spiritual awakening and some of them who have it and some of them have got recovery and some of them who haven't. But at least you're here to hear a message. Then you go home and read the book or, and the only books too. That's a spiritual act, you know. And it's a spiritual act to say, well, you know, they're using 1930s language and Bill Wilson was obviously a male chauvinist, but I don't care. There's something here that's a spiritual act,

willing to set aside your prejudices. The book thumpers like to use the set aside prayer, which still to this day does not do much for me because it's not in the book, but it helps a lot of people and it's based on the idea of the book. In the chapter, the agnostic begs us, the book is humble, by the way. It never gives you you got to do this. You got to do that. You better do this and we're doing it right.

You know how humble the book is. Just listen that you how many times have you heard

how it works? Red, you know, it goes in one ear and out the other. It becomes a liturgy.

We beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very start. We beg of you to lay aside prejudice even against organized religion. You know all you need is willingness. If you can just say to yourself, I'm willing to believe that is enough. From this simple approach you know you can make, you know the book is humble. It is never arrogant. It is never been.

It says our books meant to be suggestive only we know only a little.

God will disclose more to you and to us. The book is humble. You might meet a book. Thumper is more the only ones doing it right. You can just tell him to piss off. That's not the tone of the book. That's not the attitude of the book. Just read the black words in the blue book. OK, the black print in the blue book. All right. I went through the Oxford Group History and nonsense.

Are you a real compulsive overeater?

If when you honestly want to. Page 44. Let me see if I can get to this thing.

There must be a way to jump to a page. I bet

this thing,

Yeah, no type. Where do you do that? Here to the left.

Yeah. OK, you guys know this.

Oh, it might be a couple. How do I get there? Just put enter.

All right. Wow,

there is a solution.

What are we looking for? Well, I thought it was on page 44. If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely.

Oh did I miss it already? God damn.

Oh really?

Down one

very beginning of chapter 4. So if you just chapter 4 top, but

at the top bar,

yeah,

yeah, up

all right, and then down.

Try typing in 6262.

Sorry, it's the very first chapter of We Agnostic. What have I got? I got 42 in here. It's in 44

pages in the beginning that don't have actual numbers if they count for No, no, no, no, that doesn't. That's not how it works. They start the numbering for Bill story. They they start the numbering from Bill story. Oh,

yeah.

Oh, that's what it is. PDF now. OK, all right, I got, well, I got the it's on the page 44, the big book.

If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when binging, you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably a compulsive overeater. So this allows you on page 44 to diagnose yourself if that be the case. And that's for you to decide, not me. I'm not going to tell you. You may be suffering from an illness which only a spiritual experience will conquer.

OK, if you're the real deal,

you know a compulsive overeater, you're suffering from a spiritual malady, not a group therapy, support group, diet and calories club malady that can be cured by diet and calories club or support group or group. You're suffering from a spiritual malady that only a spiritual solution,

but people may not be coming in at the the levels of Harlan. If you listen to Harlan story, you know why he's a book thumper. He's beyond human aid. That's a line from the book we. It's a line from the doctor's opinion. These men were beyond human aid.

OK,

why not the big book? Why would people not want to do this? Why wouldn't you not be interested in this miracle of healing as the book says on page 57? Well, while they're not coming in low bottom, they're coming in, you know, they had some experience. Maybe they'll think they can do this on their own. So they don't need to find God to, you know, spiritual experience. They want a diet and calories club. It's all they're trying to figure out the food plan, You know,

let's get the food plan. Get out of here.

Why wouldn't they want the big book?

Whether this is on page 34 of the big boat? Whether such a person can quit upon a non spiritual basis

depends upon the extent to which he has already lost the power to choose whether he will compulsively overeat or not.

So if you still think you can do it based on, you know, some slogans or just attendance at some meetings

or some, you know, take some service commitments, get a good food sponsor, you know, keep you on track, maybe you can quit on a non spiritual basis. I'm not here to tell you what to do that you got to do this. That's up for you to diagnose. But it says if you're a real if you really have lost the power of choice, the extent to which you need this, you know, is is crucial. I can only tell you that

people who don't

approach this as a spiritual malady and requiring a spiritual solution can get pretty effed up. Even if they manage to hold on to their abstinence and stay thin, you know they can get really miserable. Page 52 will come back in their lives.

I go into the difference between a religion and a spiritual program.

The basic difference is this. Religions usually tell you who God is,

what he is. They usually add, we got them, we got the right one. The other guys over there, they got the wrong one. And then they usually they'll take it to the point where they go to war against the other. And this has been the history of man practically. And a spiritual program just says you need a guide. You got to find one, you got to get one. But we will give you a map, a treasure map to find the treasure, right? You're going to go on a treasure hunt. The point is, what's the whole point of the program?

I'm willing to go along, grow along spiritual lines.

Not that I've lost,

you know, £100 from my top weight and then I kept it off for 33 years. That's a great thing to be able to say to get your attention. But that's ultimately not the point. My real message to you is I've had a spiritual awakening. I no longer see life the way I used to see life. That's my real message. And oh, yeah, by the way, I don't like, I'm not obsessed with eating anymore. That's a consequence of the spiritual awakening

it's been. I've been relieved. The obsession has been lifted from me.

You know compulsive food is no longer my master. Bill Wilson recommends in the in the A12 and the OA 12 and 12 is very well written. I do like the OA 12:00 and 12:00. He just recommends quit the debating society, relax, take it easy, start with the meaning, start with a group. You can start and make your approach from this simple level.

OK,

let's see,

how do you take somebody through the Big Book? I'll just mention this in the beginning to those of you who had Big Book Awakening

experience. No, it's the book says that this program is simple and personal. So basically what I'm doing when I'm working with a newcomer is I'm sitting across from another compulsive reader.

I'll have them cross out alcohol, put in food, cross out, you know, alcoholism, put in compulsory reading, and we're just going to start reading a book and I'm going to turn the statements into questions. It's that simple. It's not rocket science. I'm turning the statements into questions. Here's like most of us have been unwilling to admit that we're real compulsive readers. Chapter 3, page 30. So I asked the guy, have you been unwilling to admit, at least in the past, that you're a real compulsive over here? Well, yeah, I didn't want to think. I thought I could do it with

Jenny Craig or whatever.

No person likes to think he's bodily, mentally different from his fellows.

Do you think you're bodily and mentally different from your fellows? Well, no. Well, then maybe he hasn't taken his first step yet. OK,

The idea that somehow someday he will control and enjoy his overeating is the great obsession of every abnormal eater. Have you suffered from the delusion that someday you're going to control and enjoy your eating? Well, yeah. I thought I could do it, but I guess I can't. That's why I wound up here sitting with you. And he's not very thrilled about it.

And and I'm going to point out the here's the here's the first step in the book. On page 30, we learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost cells that we were compulsive over eat. Is this is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people are presently maybe has to be smashed. This is crucial.

I'll point this out to you.

There's a way of doing this. They call it doing the steps off the wall or doing the real steps as outlined in the book. You can, you know how you go into the meeting? They got the posters on the wall, the steps into traditions. Oh, what's the first step? Powers over food and our lives on manageable. That's not really the first step. That's the short form. You know, we got the long form, the short form of the traditions. I don't know if you're aware of that. If you read the back of the AA12 and 12, they'll show you this, the long formative traditions in the short form.

There's really a long form and a short form in the steps. You can read the steps off the banners, try and do them off the wall, or you can have an experience with somebody who knows what they're doing in the book. They devote about 60 pages, I think, to the first step in the big book. It goes from the doctor's opinion all the way to chapter to the agnostics. One good thing about Sherman's guide is

he shows you where the steps are laid out in the book.

You know where they are. You know where step one is, where Step 2 is, where Step 4 is. Five is 6789. And then, you know, let 10:11 and 12:00. And they devote all this time to step one in the book. More pages. Because it's more than just saying I'm powerless over food. My life's unmanageable. I have to concede to my innermost self that I'm not horrible. I'm not like normal people. That's a heavy.

That's a heavy thing. You know that

I have to be convinced if I've really lost the power of choice over food, that I need a spiritual solution. What this implies is more than just

Impala. It's like it's like, OK, I want every sugar again and my life is going to be fine to to really fully take the first step

in the book method

accepts the fact that I cannot even absent even if I manage to get on a food plan, get rid of the sugar, maybe start losing the work. I'm presentable. I can go for job interviews again.

It means that sooner or later

I'm going to try and manage and run my own life and it's going to be a disaster. That's the real implication of step one in the book that I've got a spiritual malady

and with a lot of us coming into the program, including myself, I'll speak from personal experience. I got sober, I got abstinent and I still it was kind of like, OK, I'll let owe a manage the food. AO managed the drinking. I'm going to run finance and romance. I'm going to I'm going to manage whether I pay my taxes, obey the traffic laws, how I'm going to deal with my fellow human beings who I'm going to be rude to or do you know, push around.

See, that's called

pussyfooting around with the steps and as a result, and I didn't have a good foundation for my first sponsor. As a result, seven years into this thing, I was ready to commit suicide or homicide. Okay,

the real implication first of the first step on page 30 means that you are not you are a crazy person and you're not capable of running your own life is the real implication of step one in the big book. You know, and to get to that point, well, if you know it depends on what you have to do. If you can gather sponsor take you through this and you can do it by answering the questions

and identification.

OK,

more power to you. Sometimes you got to be a hard nut like me, which is try and let always take care of the food a take care of the the drinking. But I'll take care of finance, romance, whether I pay my taxes, how I treat my fellow human beings. And I have to experience a bottom in those areas to realize I don't know shit about managing money. I cannot seem to obey the traffic laws on my own power.

I know nothing about women. I'm getting obsessed with women. I'm in financial and security and fear all the time even though I'm a well educated intelligent guy.

What the hell is going on with me here?

He's called. Sometimes people called the 2nd surrender the second bottom. The implication of that first step is that you are not capable of managing your life well.

I will jump out a little bit. I'll jump ahead to

if you really take and then you come to believe that power can restore you to sanity. You've already come to believe it with the food or you wouldn't be here. But it also it requires the realizing that you need a God in your life

to help you with all areas of your life. You can't just all the oil. Take care of the food. I'll take care of finance. I'll take care of romance. I'll take care of how I treat the plumbing insurance guy. Whatever I was talking to Peppy about it brings you to this.

Resolution which or consideration the book thumpers call these realizations of the book the considerations the things that you have to look at and think about and either accept or reject or identify with. If you've really done the 1st 2 steps, you wind up on page 60 bottom paragraph, the first requirement. This is the requirement for going through the taking the third step decision that you need a God in your life.

The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life run on self will can hardly be a success. And sometimes it takes years in the program abstinent to get convinced of that. And at that point you you you search out a guy like me or Harlan and you say something ain't working in my life. I lost 75 lbs

and I'm miserable, you see. And then you're ready for the original program,

see, because you can work two sides of the triangle, you can work the slogans, you can work on the meetings and garbage dumping until you get to the point of complete and utter surrender that I need a higher power in all my affairs. Okay. And became the bill. It came the bill pretty early.

OK

check this out

page 13 I was to test my thinking by the new God consciousness within see he Eddie was bringing him the original message word of mouth didn't have the book yet, but the original message that this is a spiritual parent common sense would thus become uncommon sense. One of my favorite lines in the book. I was

sit quietly when in doubt, asking only for direction and strength to meet my problems as he would have me. Never was to pray for myself except as my request born my usefulness to others. Then only might I expect to receive. But that would be in great measure. See, I can't expect to get a new car,

but I can expect all right. God help me deliver a message to this OA retreat,

you see, because then I'm praying to help others.

My friend promised when these things were done, I would enter upon a new relationship with my Creator.

Are you interested in the new relationship with your creator? You see, you ask this, the newcomer,

then I would have the elements of a way of living which answered all my problems. Are you interested in having a way of life that answers all your problems? You see, I'm sitting there with a newcomer and I'm asking them these questions. That's this is the book Thumper method of taking a guy through the book. Before the Big Book Awakening guys were written. This is the original method. You sit there, simple and personal. The guy sitting in front of me, I'll meet with my OA sponsee and I have one place where I meet which I don't tell anybody about because it's a great place

and and we go through the book.

Simple but not easy. A price had to be paid. This is page 14. It meant destruction of self centeredness. Are you ready to pay the price?

OK,

I must turn in all things towards the Father of Light who presides over us all. Now, Bill capitalizes Father of Light. Okay, once again, male chauvinist, right? 1930s language. Whenever he's capitalizing in the book, he's referring to a divinity, right? You don't like Father of Light? Put Mother of Light, I don't care. Put whatever your higher power concept is, I don't care.

Are you ready to turn in all things to your higher power for direction?

Which means to me it's no longer oh, it takes care of food a takes care of booze. I get to run finance. I get to run romance. I get to run whether I pay my taxes. I get to run how I treat the the clerks in the stores. I have to turn in all things now to my higher power. Are you ready to turn in all things to your higher power? You see,

this is the real implication of step one, that you can't run your life.

Yes, you're powerless over food, but even if you manage to get abstinent, your life will become unmanageable. And I can promise you that. My experience has shown me, including in my own personal experience that happened to me, that if I just turn the food over to the program and don't have a higher power, I will manufacture my own misery. Page 52 I've I've had it happen. That's why I go through the steps again on a regular basis.

OK, so that's the essence of the book Thumper method.

And many, many pages are directed towards step one in the book. But sometimes you got to be a hard head like me and mismanage your life for a few years until you hit a second bottom and get well and they go for the real solution. That's what happened to me. If you got a sponsor, they can take you through the book and get you surrendered just through a reading process. My hat's off to you. The book thumpers believe this is true,