The 32nd Annual Ventura County Convention in Ventura, CA

10 And now it is my pleasure to welcome our main speaker, 3M from Greensboro, NC

Hi everybody. I'm going to recovered alcoholic named Reed Martin. Can you hear me OK? If the speakers blow out on this thing, don't worry, I'll keep talking.

Thank you very much.

I have had a wonderful time out here. This, this is one of the greatest events I have been to. It was so well organized. These things are hard to put together. I'm, I do a little bit of, of work in the service area back home and I'm got roped in to be in the DCM of my district, the largest district in three states. And we get a whole lot of people who are ready to sign up and help and work on something like this. And about a week before me and the other guy

have about had all we can take. And but that isn't what happened here. Everybody kept doing things and and I'm just, I'm just really, really impressed at all. It all worked out beautifully. It's, it's great.

My sobriety date is May the 3rd, 2001, it was a Thursday. The 1st Thursday in May happens to be the National Day of Prayer. And in 2001 it was the 50th anniversary of the National Day of Prayer. I think that's real important,

the cell center in this part because he

it took the whole United States

Bran at the same time

to get me to go to a meeting and I if you were one of them, I want to say thank you because it it has made a difference. I picked up that ship and haven't looked back.

I, I've met so many people out here and after talking to you guys and hearing from some of y'all, I almost wonder why I'm even here.

You know, other places I've been and even where I'm from, there's a lot of different things going on and Alcoholics Anonymous these days, there's a lot of different understandings and misunderstandings and behaviors of, of what, what the program is and what it's not and how we do it and how we do it wrong

or how we do it right. And, and here it's just everybody's so like minded. So we're going to spend about an hour, we're going to talk about a bunch of things we all agree about and, and, and that's about it. Somebody who wasn't mentioned I have to call on is Rick Wilson right here. And Rick called me up about, I don't know, six months ago and said, what are you doing in September? And I said, well, I'm, he said, I don't care. Good. I need you to come, come see us. Can you come? And

I've got a new best friend here in Ventura County. And if you don't know Rick, you should. You should get to know him,

and I don't mean at a meeting where everybody's watching because he'll have to put on that thing, but you get it. Pull him aside, pull him aside somewhere and, and, and do that one alcoholic with another thing and, and you'll, you'll have a new friend too.

My story is tragic and fun and exciting and, and miserable and there's laughing and crying and all kinds of things and injuries and, and explosions and

really there are

burn units and hospitals and, and that stuff is really interesting. And it takes a long time. And I usually start talking really, really fast, about 5 minutes till time to start because I gotta hurry up and get sober. And, and, and So what I started doing a while back is I kind of said, well, you know, we, we've kind of already gotten there. My sponsor reminds me that that my job is to be at the place

it's not to be helpful. Page 102 of the book. My job is to be at the place where I can be a maximum helpfulness to others.

And so I'm here and you know, at this point I prayed earlier that I'll leave now and my higher power come down and and you'll hear what whatever you're supposed to hear.

That Thursday back in in May

was an interesting time. I had just been out of the state mental hospital for about two weeks.

A little bit before that. I was 36 years old. I didn't have what I wanted in my life. Everything I'd ever had, I'd ruined. Everybody I ever loved I had seen in their face, heard from them in in in mail, e-mail or or from a lawyer that they didn't like me and didn't ever want to see me again. And

and had seen disappointment on everyone I cared about,

especially after I swore to myself that I wouldn't ever do it to him again. And I did it to him again.

I didn't really want to do this anymore. So many people I've heard at meetings will say things like, I mean, we'll hear all kinds of things at meetings. Just say, you know, if you drink, you'll die, you know? And if I had been told that in the beginning, I would have asked, where do I go? Where do I get, get that ticket? Because I'm ready, I'm done. I don't measure up to what I would like to measure up to. I can't do this life

in any way, form or fashion. And I'm done.

And right before in April, I, I, I decided that with the help of a large bottle of gin and

put a garden hose in the exhaust pipe of my, my truck and fired it up and, and started drinking and, and was later revived by the, by the Sheriff's Department. And these guys, even though I did what drums do, you know, leave me alone and, and kind of woke up and started fighting and kicking and, and the girls fighting

wake up. I don't know. We do guys, we fight. It doesn't matter who it's with. And they didn't take me to jail. They took me to the to the health department where I spent the whole night. And the next morning a doctor came in and, and said, well, you know, whether it was attention or or whatever, it doesn't matter. You know, if somebody does something like that for attention, guess what, They win. And

in in the state of North Carolina, a second Doctor has to decide if you actually get the prize.

And so they put me in a Paddy wagon. Well, of course, I was still mad and angry. They put me in this cage like this big dog kennel is what it was. It's got it's a chain link. And they put me in this big dog kennel overnight. And I tried to rip it off the ceiling because I don't know why that would have made a difference somehow. And so, well, it was a good idea that you had to be there. And so

they put me into this, these, these, these handcuffs and these shackles, which are bigger handcuffs. If you haven't had any, they're just like then then they put a chain between them with a padlock and put me, loaded me like that suitcase into a, into a Paddy wagon where there were three other guys that weren't chained or handcuffs. And we rode for two hours down the state mental hospital ended up there. They were, it was a crazy place. It was 4 crazy people. I mean, I didn't, it wasn't, you know, there's some people say, well, there's a treatment, said no, this is

crazy war. This is psych ward, whatever you want to call it. That's where I was and I couldn't get out. They, I went in, I did the little interview. They asked me one day. It was, you know, asked me my name and I answered all the questions correctly. And somehow they made a mistake and I failed the test and I, I got to stay. And anyway, I got out of that place And, but while I was in there, all the airs that I had held up, you know, I mean, because when I was, when I was drinking like this and, and, and, and

all these other things, you know, all the drugs and stuff like that. And I'm going to bounce around a lot. That happens. There's only a few brain cells left. There's like three or four. They don't like each other and they don't get along. So, you know, I mentioned the drug thing and I didn't see anybody leave yet, but they're about to. And so, you know, I, I, I study the, the, the, the program of Alcoholics.

And

to me it is a, it's a copyrighted work.

Umm, it's a, it's a program owned by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services Incorporated. It's not a word of mouth program. It's not something somebody said today. I was talking where it was a Rhonda, is she here? You hear Rhonda? No, she didn't make it. We were, we were talking and she says, yeah, I heard, heard out there. They said. And I said, oh, well, that's just it Ron. It's not an out there program. It's a, it's a. It's a bug

and

we heard a minute ago you know the description of the alcoholic chapter of the agnostic and our personal adventures before and after May Claire Freeford and ideas a that we were alcoholic and could not manage right now. Then first sentence was the description of the alcoholic and on page 21 and 22 it talks about the description of the alcoholic. And I know you all already know this, but that's

you should have called somebody else.

This is what I do. I don't have something new. It's the same same program and there's a citizen there and it says

it's just on page 22. It says this is by number means a comprehensive picture of the true alcoholic because as our behavior patterns vary. But this description should identify him roughly. Well, what description it Well, it goes before that on page 21 it starts and says, here's the fellow who's been puzzling you, right? You remember that. It goes on and on, says all kinds of things about him. And then it gets to this point and it says as matters grow worse, he begins to use a combination of high-powered sedatives

and liquor to quiet his nerves so he can go to work. And it goes on and on. And, you know, then, then, then he gets drunk all over again and, and can't take it. Maybe he goes to a Doctor Who gives him morphine or some other sedatives. Anyway,

our behavior patterns may vary. Mine varied a little bit and

sometimes I thought that, you know, the drugs were better. Sometimes I thought the alcohol was better. And the best thing is whenever I go into the doctor and I got a prescription and it said, you know,

alcohol may intensify effect,

My first thought was like so many great cooks I know that say, do we have baking soda?

Do we have gin? Do we have gin? I need to stop at the get some gin on the way home. So there's drugs in my story. I don't apologize for it. It's, you know, it, it's in, it's in Bill's story, it's in Bob's story. And according to the description of the alcoholic, it's, it's a typical symptom

of a real alcoholic.

I was on all that stuff and, and I got out of this, this, this mental hospital while I was there, my whole family and all my friends, even though I dressed up in suits, you know, and went out to the bars and tried to look all together. You know, they, they didn't know that there was trash on at the floor of every room of my house

knee deep. They didn't know that that I was living in one little room or a portion of a room where the boxes, you know, the hallways were boxes stacked on either side. And you had to kind of turn sideways to get through this place. And it was nasty and dirty. And the ashtrays had never been emptied except for when I knocked them over and, and then I just picked them up. And so, I mean, we're cigarette butts and beer cans and trash all over the floor and it's nasty. And that's where I live.

And people went there to go try to take care of things while I was locked up. And they saw that and the cat was out of the bag.

So when I got back home, it didn't matter anymore. And I could drink like I really wanted to and I could do everything because it didn't matter. Everybody knew there was nothing to hide anymore. So I did. And I, I went out this one night.

I had previously driven my car out and we had this little outfit called designated driver. A, a company, a company called designated driver. And, and what they would do is if you got to the bar and you drank too much, you handed your keys to the bartender, you got a free drink. And they called these people and for 20 bucks they came and they got you and they brought a driver who drove your car home. They drove you and your right knee. Neat tricks

and but that was getting expensive. So I said, you know, I should just call the cab now, you know, And so I take a cab out, go to a bar and this and that and get hammered. I get the bartender's number, put it in my phone. You need to be back here at 2:00 AM. When the bar's closed, they close back then back east. They don't stay open around the clock. And, and because then when all the liquor's gone and the liquor stores closed, we're going to have to get some other things to make it till morning. We'll have to head

downtown. And so we did that. And along the way, I encounter this, this, this young lady and I, she had like a third shift job. Can we say that here? And so, and she, she was, she knew how, where to go find these things and, and get them and get, and we exchange information. She was kind of, I, I don't know, she's like a Hostess, if you will,

very friendly. And she said we're riding this cab to go to this place because they won't take anyway. They need to see somebody they know or they won't open the door. And she's like, so what's your story? She says,

and I said, well, I just got out of a state mental hospital for trying to kill myself, and I had a pocket full of money and I'm going to turn it into a pocket full of everything I can find. And I'm going to do every bit of it by myself until I pass out or my heart stops. What's your story?

And we became instant friends.

Later she called me and a parent who was in transition

from living places and needed a room and I had a lots of rooms and I sweat some user pushed room shut the crap out of the way and she used one of the rooms in the house and had folks that would deliver everything. They'd go by the liquor store, the beer store in Carlos''s house and all at once and it all come and I didn't have to drive anywhere. So this was great. And so we woke up after about seven days of being awake one day and it was May the 3rd 2001. We went to his doctor's office and she had this,

it wouldn't go away. And I said an infection, you know, the stuff you're doing, the antibiotics won't work. You need something a little stronger. And she said, well, you tell the doctor, we get in there and do all this and I, I somehow told the doctor the wrong thing. I'm not real good. Sometimes it can communicating mislight him or something. I said Doc would kind of got a little substance abuse issue where they was like, that's fantastic. My name's Phil. I'm alcoholic.

How long have you been

sober? And I told him he'd been almost two hours. And and so he sits down. He tells us about alcohol stones. He tells U.S. history. He didn't ask any questions. He told us about himself and he wasn't in a hurry to get into the next room. He told us about himself and he told us what happened and what he got. And he said these people are just like you and they're happy and they don't they're they're doing really well. You ought to, you ought to meet them. You ought to go find them. And I said, well, where do we find these people?

So that's the easiest part. You dial 411 and ask for Alcoholics Anonymous. And he made it sound very attractive. He wouldn't give up the goods. You know, he didn't say, oh, wow, I'll take you or here, let me write out a map for you. He just said, well, if you really want to know,

do it yourself basically is what I said.

And that made me want to know even more because see this girl, she was sick. She was, she needed help. This girl needed a lot of help. So we, we left. I, I call my cell phone, it's 625. I'm listening to the voice that the recording. There's a meeting that starts at in 5 minutes at the next stop light as I was driving and we pulled in there as a small meeting and and folks were talking for a while and, and I don't remember much.

I don't remember much and I really don't remember about much about the whole first year for that matter.

But one thing that sticks out, this lady, I guess they probably knowing some things now, they went around the room. They recognized, hey, there's some, there's some dope themes and drunks in here. Let's let's tell them what this life can be like. And they went around the room one at a time

in a circle, and this lady said

she hadn't missed a day of work in six years. She said her lights hadn't been cut off in six years

and that that was really the one that got me because I had money in the bank still. I had worked in commercial real estate for many years and was doing pretty well and was getting fat checks every so often for doing nothing. Sorry about that recession folks,

wasn't all my fault. It was just a small and

but my ice got cut off about every sixty days because I didn't I didn't go out to the mailbox and check the mail and and they would cut it off and I call and turn it on with credit carpet, but they said things, whatever they said in about 10 minutes. I just started crying in there

because I knew right away, wow, that this might be the problem, this could be the solution. There might be a way for me to get better. We go home, we get the white chef. We, we go home and we have white ships there surrendered chips and dumped out everything I had and, and I and I, I think this part is important too. I have this old farmhouse that came free with a piece of land that I, I bought, I invested in back to the real estate days. And

so I'm in this whole, this whole house and I've dumped everything out, every bottle and everything. And I'm sitting there and I'm like, wow, this is

here we go. This is this. I'm starting something here. This is

and lined on both sides of the sink of these shelves and they're just they're just packed as height as they can be with all these prescription bottles and medicines and all these things for all the doctors I've been to a medical this mental medical history, this thing. And you know, I said to myself that

even if I quit drinking and any of this other mess I've been doing, I'm still not normal.

I people still don't like to be around me. People still don't like me because there's still things wrong with me

and Alcoholics can be impulsive and so I said. But those people said I could wait anything and I dumped them all out.

That's not recommended.

I didn't sleep for 11 days, but I did dump them all out and I'm glad that I did because I could not have made it to day 12. I could not have made it, the shaking and the sweating.

Somewhere in the middle of their day, three or four, that young lady didn't try anymore and she left. And Marianne, if you're out there in the world, I hope you're OK.

But I went back

and I kept going back and they said keep coming back and I did that and and you know that helping one alcoholic, helping another thing, you know, there was guys with years and years and whatever months and I, I was, they swore me after meetings because that's the way they did things back then. I'm sure you all do that here. And

and what guy would come up? He'd say I've got four years or I've got eight years, I've got 10. I'm like, yeah, yeah. And this kid comes up and says I got 14 days. I said I need to talk to you.

What day did you fall asleep?

So,

and he said it was about day 10

and, and that's really about how it worked out, but I just, it was the withdrawals and the sweating and I felt, my bones felt like they were in a microwave. And, and that was the worst experience I've ever had. And I've had some bad ones. The, the stuff that I don't want to waste a lot of time on the part about the plane crash when I was 12 years old and woke up in the wreckage and crawled forward to, to watch my dad take his last breaths. And, and

you know, and,

and many others, I've been hit and beat up and knocked down a bunch of times. And but that was a painful experience that, that quitting thing,

I kept going to meetings on my 8th day,

going to meetings and

that sponsorship thing, I would go and there would be guys standing around after the meeting. I walk up to him after the meeting. I'd say, you know, because I was picking up some lingo and I said, you know, they're kind of hanging out. So I'd go hang out because that's what I thought the program was. That's what I was starting to think it was. And I, I, they might be talking about sponsors. And I said, you know,

I think I need to sponsor. And they would say you sure do.

And they walk away

and finally some guy came and told me the secret. He said you have to ask someone.

And so we're doing that and I'm thinking about this. I'm going to a meeting every single minute of the day,

every single minute of the day. I can't make it though the one day at a time was not made for me and and and the parts of every bit of my story is not made for anybody else but me. This was this is what I went through. This is what I saw along the way. Skipping around again, I don't really do the general way what I was like what happened and what I'm like now. Page 27 that tells me that they got one hope when they wrote that and this is how I read it. OK, they said. Our hope is that

the alcoholic man or woman

desperate in need will read these stories and we believe it's only by fully disclosing our innermost selves and our problems that they'll be led to say, wow, I'm one of these people. I must have this thing.

This a, a convention people. So you're here, you probably already think you have this thing. So let's move on and get to what to do about it. You know, I mean, if we, if we, if we were one-on-one and 12 steps call, it tells me that, you know, a man properly armed with the facts about himself can gain the entire confidence of another in a in a few hours,

a few hours. OK, Claudia, so we don't have a few hours.

I'll just tell you what I saw

my best direction for what I do up here comes from a a comes of age. One of my favorite, favorite books by Bill Olsen, July 1955 and gets in front of like 30,000 people

to tell his story or to give a talk and he gets up there and I'm sure they wanted to hear about the brokerage and the drinking and the motorcycle. I want to hear about the motorcycle and, and

he, he got up there and he said it's traditional in a a that we do not make speeches.

We simply talk about our own experiences and Rick, about the experiences of those around us,

which means I'll talk about you too. If I saw you, you know the things that I've seen. So

this is how it went and I went to a meeting at 8:00 in the morning.

I got out of that. I didn't know what to do. I went at breakfast with these old guys because that's what they said. They said you want to come eat and I said I don't have any money. They said we didn't ask you if you have any money.

And so I went to eat with them and then I went to a meeting at 12:00 and then I hung out with those folks for a little while and went to lunch. I knew not to say anything up. The money thing,

that was a problem when the bill came. And then I went to the 5:30 meeting, which where I'm from, it's called happy hour, which I did still understand. It's like the status 60 minutes on the planet.

So and then I went to the 8:00 and then on the weekends there was a 10:00 and then the midnight. So I mean, I'm going to 345 meetings a day my first week. So I did my 90 in a week and well, I wanted to get better faster and so I wanted to move ahead quickly. And so day eight, I'm at this meeting and

I don't know what it was on. I think it was on gratitude. And so I, you know, I, I'm, I'm well versed, you know, I've done the accelerated

version of the program through self study and, you know, independent studies, so to speak. And, and so it's time for me to share and I've got some gratitude. And I, and so I tell these people about how I had been at some meeting where they closed the meeting with this little prayer, a little moment of silence for the alcoholic who might walk by outside tonight and not even know where here and I went. That is me

you always were were praying for me

because I was the guy who went his church was located on this little Rd. that goes down to a cemetery where my dad was buried when I was 12 years old in 1977. And I've been going there since my for 23 years and, and sitting there because when that happened and I lost him in the blink of an eye,

I didn't, it was tough. And it was just a short while later, because my mother developed cancer that same summer

that she ended up there when I was 19.

And then when I was about 28 and just barely about to come out of this thing, somebody kidnapped my sister and she was missing for a year. And then she was found murdered. And, and

at that point, we put a bench out there and I would go and sit on So for 23 years. I'm going down this road past this church where these people are that I don't know about.

And and I think I'm doing pretty good with my gratitude, right? I'm on topic. I'm not missing anything. And this dude across the room, he's, I don't feel upset and he's bald and he's got tattoos up to his neck. And he just cuts me off in the middle of a big meeting. He just starts talking. I'm John and hi, John. I'm like, I'm not done here. And,

and he looks over at me. He's got this big knife that he just, he's cleaning his fingernails with it because he had just eaten an apple with it. And I, it's a, it's, I think they call him a cutlass. It's a big pirate knife. It's curved, you know,

and this guy is huge and muscles and tattoos and he's got this knife in his hand and he says, listen here, dude, you cannot ever go back to that cemetery ever again and be the same person. I know you can't. You can't because now you've got something you've never had. You've got hope.

You didn't have that before and now you got it.

And he says, I know you got it because you tell us that you came here, which means you think you had a problem. You know that you couldn't do this. So there's step one. You came back, which means you think we could do it. Duh. Take a look at US versus you. And

so that's a power greater than you wants to start with one, he says. Now it's up to you to make a decision. Are you going to let us help you?

And one of the best ways you can let us help you is to stop talking and start listening.

And you know, not he really said that in in a very matter of fact way, not not a shut up way. I mean, I was terrified enough by the knife, but he I was just pretty amazed that somebody took an interest in me And, and I think we call it taking the whole meeting hostage and crosstalk and all that. Nobody said anything to him. Maybe I told you he had a knife and so,

but he took an interest in me and I was. I was, I was

part of the group now. I was welcomed, I was accepted. And and so I asked around. Everybody knew who he was. He was, to speak some divergent he he had tattoo shops and tattoo parlors and the biggest tattoo convention in the Southeast. And he'd been on Discovery Channel and he was a big deal and he'd been in prison and he didn't go anywhere without 2 little drunkards

and a new one every day. Two new ones dragging along and they're carrying stuff and he's pushed sit down and and he had new guys all the time

pulling them around and I thought he had on labor service or something.

So I call him up and ask him if he'll be my sponsor and he says yeah, I will meet me over at this a a club at 8:00 in the morning. I'll see you there. Bye.

And I can't wait because not only he said yes and he's a celebrity, he said he's a big time dude. I didn't get up. I didn't get a run-of-the-mill sponsor. This is the this is the guy. It's like having a Big Brother. It's like, I'm going to tell my brother what it's This is a really neat thing, So I get there.

He comes in late,

strolls in big room, leans against the wall, just head back like he's sleeping. And it's just embarrassing because I wanted to tell, I'm telling everybody my sponsors coming. You gotta check this guy out. So and so he's one of those guys. He leaned forward every once in a while and say something like, that's not what the book says.

Because people were, I don't know, they respected him or they were afraid of him that he would cut off the whole at the end of a meeting. Sometimes he would say, you know, the only thing you guys said about recovery was when you read the steps,

he was just really tough and mean and rude and vulgar. And he

had printed T-shirts that said he did things to your wife or girlfriend.

Can't say I'm up here.

And so for a little while, I had a resentment because I was like, uh-huh, I knew somebody was doing that. Anyway,

Anyway, my head won. So I run up to him after this meeting and I'm like, what? OK, I'm ready to do the same. I'm excited, I'm ready to go. I, I don't want to move this soon. You know, making this this week is, I hadn't slept. I've been up since 4 waiting for this damn meeting to start. So what do we do? How do we do to say anything? And he, he pointed at two other guys sitting on the wall who are looking at the floor. And he said, you're going to give those two guys a ride home. I brought them here.

You're taking them home.

And I said, OK, I thought you misunderstood my question, but

so

skimmer, right, honey? He's like, yeah, get their phone numbers, find out what meeting they want to go to tonight. If they can't get there, you go get them and you take them and tomorrow morning and call them, wake them up early. That's why I was like, so they'll you know, they won't get up. You need to call them a couple times and and bring them here. Get them here if they can't get here and I'll see you tomorrow. And, and you started walking out the door.

And so now I knew you didn't hear what I said. So but I didn't know what to do. I was scared. I'm shaking still. My bones are still in the microwave. It feels like he's got a knife. I don't know what to do. So I just do what the man says and and I do that. And Little John is was his name and some people know little Johnny. He traveled all over the world and

Little John would keep making me do things, keep making me help people For about that first 90 days, I, I drove guys to meetings. That's that was, I was like the, I was the a, a

transportation service. I drove people to meet every meeting, you know, morning, noon, night. They just come up to me in Fox after me. OK, 12:00 you got me at 12:00 in the 4th of 830. Hey, listen, Thursday. We need a couple people. Yeah, got it. I'm there. I have nothing else to do. I have nothing else to do. And, and and I, I couldn't be alone. I I couldn't make it a whole day

without drinking. I could not do that.

So I did that stuff and after a while Little John raises the bar. We,

we're at a meeting and he picks up this book right here or he goes over to the literature tables long time ago, 6 bucks at the dawn patrol and

he says you got 6 bucks. I'm like, well, of course I've got 6 bucks. And he says give me the give me the 6 bucks. And he says you're buying a boat. And we buy the book and, and he didn't really have me start reading it right away. He says you, you need to, but I know you're not going to

and, and, but he had me keep doing stuff. Every once in a while he would call and assign new people to pick up and say go pick up this guy taking this meeting. I'll meet you there. He wouldn't show up.

So now I got this guy

and what he was doing. I think most of y'all already know this. I mean, this guy was tricking me. He didn't tell me. Look, if you will, if you will spend your time trying to help somebody else, You'll you'll, it'll help take your mind off what's bugging you. It'll help take your mind off one to drink, want to do other things. And, and, and you're going to get, we're, we're going to keep you around long enough to get some sense into you.

He just said do it. And, and not just with me, but he, he was doing like 20 at a time. You know, I was just, I was a number, I think, I don't know. And he, he was really something else. And I did that after a while and my mind was starting to come together and we, we read through the book a little bit together and point out some stuff. He did pick meetings I was supposed to go to where they read out of the book. It got to be pretty regular. If it's not, if they don't have the book, then you're at the wrong meeting. And

Little John got sober in prison and that's all they have.

He was somewhere where they didn't even have meetings coming in. He had a book and some guys and

so we we did this stuff and

raise the bar at some point. I love this part of the story. I don't know when I saw we got to 11, right. Yeah. So

just tell me a quarter till

he he raised the bar a little bit. There's a treatment center by he's like, OK, so now you need to get a commitment. You need to get something to do. You know, they've got these vans you can drive once you've been sober six months, you can go up there and start this fight. I go sign up and I and I'm a volunteer driver and I had seen some other people doing that. That seemed pretty special.

I get out of the van and one day going to the very first meeting I'd ever driven him to, and I walk up to some other folks that I knew had been doing it, you know, And now I was as cool as them, if not better,

as I probably get it better. And I said, I drove the van and this one guy says, that's really nice, Reid. I did that every week for a for a year. And I said, well, that's, that's, that's all about 52 weeks. That's that's 10 people in advantage

520. You took 520 people to a meeting. Wow. That is, that is something else. He said, well, I, I missed a couple weeks. I went off see, you're not all that. And he said, yeah, one week got my, my, my father died and the other week I was in the hospital. But I was there every other time because it's, it's not worth doing unless you make a commitment. So you'll do it when you don't want to. That is what we have to do. We have to commit ourselves to to being somewhere for somebody else because our brain will take us somewhere else.

And I said, OK, I didn't really hear any of that. I just, I realized that took two weeks off. So now we're fifty weeks. That's times 10. That's 500 people. We took around 7 and this miracle obsession and and so 500 and 500 is pretty good. I took 10. He's did. I'll take 1000.

That's what I'll do. I'll show him. I'll take 1000 people to a meeting.

So I have a little piece of paper that they gave me with the names on it. Next week when I came back, I got the next piece of paper and I went eleven, 12/13/14 and not adding them up. And I went home every week. And I stuck that thing on the bulletin board and I kept it going and I'd be at 200 and then I'd be at 300 and I'd be at 400. And then after all, one day this this Sergeant Carter, anybody ever watched that show,

this fellow Sergeant Carter like a bus into an, a, a meeting in the morning? And he says, look,

that treatment center you've been driving for, we got this little halfway house where people after they go through treatment, we want to, we need a little help over there. Get these guys going and, and help them wash their clothes and show them how to put, put, put the dishes, dishwasher. Anyway, we, we, we need some help up there on the weekends. We think we were thinking about you

and I said, wow, OK. And so I go through this whole process and I meet the people up there and going through the final interview and stuff and it's not that big of a deal. Sure, you figure that out by now, but I was amazed that somebody wanted me to participate in something like that and that that somehow I was worthy of of being that kind of helpful.

And

at the very end the guy says, oh, by the way, you can't drive the vans anymore.

Like whoa dude, I got this thousand person goal, everybody knows about it and I'm at 930 cents.

It's time for you to change your goals button

and that's it. Change your goals and moved on. So but yeah, I did. I took 936 people to I mean, I took 935 of them back.

I only

lost one

maybe where the counting thing anyway, so I did this for a while

and and and what happened there is is I got tricked little John tricked me into helping us tricked me into doing the work that it talks about in the book and somewhere around.

Two years, I don't know, 18 months. I started to get real uncomfortable in meetings. I started to

I started to notice and not be comfortable anymore and my Home group is I have two home groups, one big book 2T OO because there's a big book hunger or a big book too false anyway.

And the other ones, the primary purpose group big book study,