Steps 10, 11 & 12 at the Spiritual Awakenings group in Bernardsville, NJ

And as most of you know, we've been doing a workshop with Peter M and Chris S over the last few weeks,

You were here 🕒 8 months ago

and they've been doing a rotation, doing a couple steps, then switching and doing a couple steps.
And tonight, I'd like to present Peter M.
You can clap.
My name is Peter. I'm a recovered alcoholic.
I'm grateful to be alive and sober and at a sacred place called Alcoholics Anonymous.
First things first, again, thank the group for inviting me back and allow me to be here the last few weeks and share.
My experience with this work, my experiences with a power grader myself called God,
my experience working with others, my experience being a recovered member of Alcoholics Anonymous.
Thank all of you for being here the last few weeks and giving me the permission to share what I'm inspired to share.
Thank Bill and Dave for being here each week and doing what they do.
God separated me from alcohol June 23rd, 1988.
I'm a recovered alcoholic, and anything less than that would be falsely humble in telling you if I wasn't.
A power grader myself took me in 1988, separated me from alcohol and put me on a path in Alcoholics Anonymous.
And then teachers were put in my path, put in my path, and I sought them out with the desperation when drowning manned away seek this work today.
And little by slowly, the dots were connected for me when I didn't have the power to connect them.
And then God gave me power to connect the dots.
And I'd get to a place called recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body.
Contrary to what we'll hear in contemporary AA,
where we're always recovering,
we'll always be thinking about a drink,
it's normal think about a drink because you're an alcoholic,
and I challenge that all the time,
because my book gives me different information
and my experience proves that.
And my experience, not only mine, but countless others,
that will get to a place called recovered.
We go through this work,
hopefully without any attachments, real attachments to what it's going to look like when we're on the other side,
what my spiritual awakening is going to look like, how I'm going to feel, how I'm going to be,
who I'm going to be when I get to the other side of the archway,
when I walk into the world of the spirit and experience all of God prior to that or when I get there.
And so we go through this work, the drastic and revolutionary proposals that will go through and get to experience.
And what I have found out for me, and I speak for myself, that the work will take me to experience in God.
And once I get to that place, entering the world of the spirit, my book tells me I've become recovered.
where the problem called alcohol has been removed,
and I get to a place where the isms can get removed also.
They dissolve.
They fall away.
The more God, the less self, the freer I am.
And so we get to experience God.
But what my experience has shown me over and over and over again,
if I'm experiencing God, I'm experiencing presence,
mindful of the moment, moment to moment.
What I'm really experiencing is silence.
And what my book has allowed me to do is take me to God,
which has really my book has taken me to a place of silence,
silence in meditation, and silence amid all the noise that goes on.
The traffic, the people talking, the supermarket, the children, the family,
there's silence that underlies all of this.
It's called God.
And if I can get to experience that, I get freer.
Even if I'm feeling free, I can get freer.
Can I listen to the silence between the words someone speaks?
Can I listen to the silence among all the noise?
Because the silence is what is always present.
The noise interrupts the silence, whether it be the mental noise or the external noises,
the internal dialogue or the external noises.
This book has taken me to a place of silence.
Silence when I'm speaking now.
deep down within here, that we can get inspiration that comes to us rather than from us.
I'm no longer plagued by voices of the past.
I can be present and be moved by this power, silence, mindfulness, breath.
Which brings me to a place of not being attached to before and how it should have looked
and what they should have done and what they should have said or later on,
what they should do, what they should say, how it ought to be.
I quit playing God.
I know this power I have found out by going to this work by not knowing, but not trying to interpret, by not trying to conceptualize.
It's beyond thought, beyond form, just like we are, just like I am, beyond thought, beyond form.
Beyond name, it is.
Can I experience that by just doing this work? Absolutely.
Can I read other inspirational books and be quick to see where religious people are right?
Absolutely.
That's six cents our Ten Step talks about.
Silence.
Hear it?
Yeah.
If I can take that into all my moments, I experience awful lot of freedom.
Contrary the way it was when I walked in here in 1988,
where I looked for noise, I looked for drama.
It gave me something.
It gave my thinking mind something to do.
My mind is constantly saying, give me something.
Make more drama.
Give me drama.
No drama.
I'll make some drama.
I'll create drama.
It gives me something to do, something for my mind to think about.
Just so I don't have to be present and deal with me.
And some of us in here are always looking for drama, attached to drama, controversy, problems, never accepting what is.
And what this book does take me to God, and I go past that.
And the more I'm in an experience with God, the more in the sunlight of the spirit I am, the less I'm in trouble because I'm out of the way.
Oh, I'm here. I'm present physically.
But all the manifestations of self, the thinking mind is removed.
Pride and ego is set aside. I'm present.
Right.
And I'm not trying to figure out what to tell you while you're asking me a question.
I can listen.
And it becomes so much easier to say, I don't know.
Rather than I got to come up with something because they may think less of me.
All that stuff's removed.
That's why I love to practice the silence in meditation.
That's why I love to write inventory when I have to.
I get to do this stuff.
I think I shared a couple of weeks ago.
Instead of having to, I got to, I need to, I get to, I get to come to this meeting.
I get to write inventory.
I get to pray, get to meditate, I get to recover, I get to experience God, I get to go to a doctor,
I get to play with the children, I get to take the wife here, I get to.
The alternative is no choice and do whatever drink tells me to do.
So I had to unlearn a whole lot of things while I was in here.
Some of those things were just removed, but there was a lot of unlearning,
finding out what God was not in order to experience what God is at that moment.
Presence.
So I came into Alcoholics Anonymous with all these belief systems
and a lot of contempt about anything to do with God.
Spirituality and religion to me was synonymous.
I found out that this spiritual path can take me to a religious place, a religious community,
but there's a little bit of a difference between the two for me.
So when you talk about a spiritual way of living, I heard you say a religious way of living,
and I had contempt right investigation.
And I would bristle at antagonism.
And I came in with belief systems and resentments and fear about God.
What that looked like for me.
What?
Main problem for the alcohol centers in the mind, not the body, right?
So the book tells us, how often do we approach God with a thinking mind
and use our thinking mind to figure out what God is
and make decisions based on a thinking mind?
Well, my mind says God is this, so that's God.
And so therefore I just limited God, put him or it or her in a box
because I'm using me to figure out God, to interpret God.
And I could be the most well-read man in the world.
I can be a scholar from university.
I could have the secrets of the universe.
And it amounts of a grain of sand on a beach when it comes to me figuring out what God is and its power.
It just is all love in the opposite.
So how often do we go through our day and figure out how God is?
I know God based on my thinking mind.
I've shared this a million times. I can see to the end of this room.
If I go out on the road, probably see a couple of blocks, and then I lose it.
Can't see any further.
Behind me, to the left of me, to the right of me, in front of me.
And I make all my decisions based on that limited sight distance.
I make all my decisions based on everything I can hear.
And God is way beyond that.
God is much greater than that.
I've learned the hard way.
When things don't work, the way I think they ought to, maybe, maybe it's God saying,
this is not good for you, I need to, I need you to be here.
I need to steer you in this direction.
I'm back to acceptance of what is.
And the difference between the happiness that we always shoot for and the internal peace
that we can get in here.
The happiness, got to get the money, got to get horror, got to get the right house, got to get all the external things.
So I feel happy for this long.
I bought the new car. I feel happy.
Then I get the first car payment. I'm angry again.
Then I'm really, it's bondage.
Where do I park? Don't hit me.
Pull into the driveway. Keep the kids away.
I'm standing outside with a shotgun.
You know, great way to live, right?
Then the car gets old and I start throwing cigarettes in cans and I don't care anymore. I stop washing it.
That kind of fizzled out and I'm looking for something else.
Internal happiness is a different place, a state of being, how I be, regardless of what I'm driving, what I'm making, who's in my life, who's not in my life.
Because the mind's not involved in that.
Mine always trying to interpret, good, bad, like this, like all of it, able to see me over the last 18 years how many times I fell into thinking mind and freedom with spirit.
And I share that with you because my book has pointed me to that place and pointed me to other directions in order to experience freedom.
And every time we show up to this work, we may be experiencing being free.
The question we sit with the do I want to get freer.
And if the experience of going through the work on the other side of the archway was so glorious, felt so good, I'm shouting it to everyone.
You know, I'm in the men's, I'm feeling good, I'm writing him into her, I'm feeling great.
Everything seems to be okay.
I have a different presence.
I feel in here.
Then why deny myself to go through that once more?
What happens is somewhere in 10 and 11, we start to kick back and use sound bites from the past in order to be, you know, to use for present stuff.
When I went through the work, when I had my spiritual experience, I was going to work,
All this leads me up to now, what are we doing currently?
What's my current prayer life look like?
What's my current life of meditation look like?
Where am I in amends?
Who am I working with?
Do I have any of those things going on?
And if we don't, don't listen to the mind who's going to start to judge and character
assassinate you and not allow you to be impeccable with your word towards yourself?
Just recognize it as, okay, I just woke up to something.
I need to do more.
I need to experience more.
Maybe I should experience more.
I just woke up to some walls that I've been hitting.
So we get to experience the death of self before the physical death when we go through this work.
I shared, I think, the first week, how many of us come to this work to die?
When I was given that question, I was annoyed.
I was insulted by a question like that.
What do you mean?
I came here to die.
I was not.
I turned into Pete from Brooklyn in about two minutes.
What do you mean?
But we show up to the sponsor's doorstep, right?
Can you help me?
Why? Because it's on us and we've got to get past what's on us.
I can't stop thinking about a drink.
My behavior is, it looks like a drunk without a drink in me.
Fear is on me.
I'm living on page 52.
Or we show up to the work after being in here a little while
and we seek these big book workshops or we seek out a teacher,
take me past where I am.
If we look at that, what we want to do is die.
We want to experience the depth of self because that's what's in the way.
When we work with meditation, we can experience a place.
My sponsor's teacher called it nothingness.
People call it pure consciousness, space.
There's nothing going on.
There's no mind going on.
It's pure.
It's freeing.
It's presence.
We can work with meditation and get there, unlike what it was for me when I got here.
We can get to that place and take that experience into all our affairs.
Now, my thinking mind will tell me you can't do that.
I have to go to work.
I need to think.
I need to setting the children off to school.
I need to think.
I need to go argue with my neighbor because he has the lawnmower going on
on a Sunday morning at 9 o'clock.
I need to think.
But can we take that place that we get to in meditation into those affairs?
Right.
So we practice meditation by silence and silence we meditate.
Meditate, we silence. We get silent and silence. We meditate.
Step 10 says on page 84, this thought, and the thought they're talking about is what precedes that is that these promises will always materialize if we work for them.
With that thought, it brings us to step 10, which suggests we continue to take personal inventory
and continue to set right in any new mistakes as we go along.
Inventory and amends is what step 10 involves.
As we cleaned up the past, and it uses the word this way of living.
And how it works, it says we develop the manner of living, which demands rigorous honesty,
way of living, developing a manner of living.
It's not something that I go to like, I'm in trouble, got to read my book.
And get free and wait till it's on me again.
I need to call the sponsor.
It's now who we be, a new place of consciousness or awareness.
It's who we be now.
This is what we do.
This is who we be.
Inventory, seek counsel, make amends, meditate, work with others,
give of myself without expecting anything to, in return,
a completely new set of ideas.
We're guided by now.
Were God-inspired rather than self-inspired?
It says I've entered the world of the spirit, but it doesn't mean I get free room and bought.
Like, okay, I had my spiritual awakening, so now I'm going to hang out for a while and see what happens.
Because alcoholism knows exactly what I'm doing, right?
As long as I'm in the sunlight of the spirit, the problem has been removed and will stay removed.
When I start to rest on my laurels, my accomplishments of an hour ago or last week or last month,
alcoholism says, hmm, maybe we do have a crack in the armor.
And the red flag is what I was alluding to earlier when I use my experience of yesterday, my spiritual awakenings of yesterday to use for today rather than going to work again.
I had a spiritual experience back in 1975 and it's 2006 and I'm still replaying that.
And is it possible? I've started to worship my mind and intellect and knowledge rather than God, which has been keeping me sober all along.
So every time we get to go to this work, we smash ego, we kill self a little bit more.
Less self, more God.
It says, my next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness.
My book uses words like vigorously next, now, launched.
Words that tell me, convey your thought that I need to do something, need to move.
It says this is not an overnight matter. It should continue for a lifetime, continue to watch.
And it gives me some things to look out for. Watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear.
When these crop up, I ask God at once to remove them. I discuss them with someone immediately and make amends if I've harmed anyone.
I've been working now for a while with this word called immediately. There's three guys I speak to.
When something comes up, I'll write inventory.
Make prayer, and if it's still with me, I'll discuss it with someone immediately.
I won't give it an opportunity to grow and carry into tonight,
carry into tomorrow, then we get the emotional hangover.
You know how it goes when you wake up first thing in the morning and you're in yesterday,
and you've got the internal dialogue going on,
we may be seeking counsel with, hey, I can't get past this.
This happened an hour ago.
I'm with it.
And so we see counsel, discuss with someone immediately.
And then I go see who I can be serviced to.
And I've shared this many times.
I was working for this day trading firm, and I was an HR person.
And I went from the waterfront to white collar, and that was just...
it was very strange for me.
I had to learn how to write emails and wear a shirt and tie to work,
and I mean, just that whole corporate thing that goes on, right?
And there was a gentleman there who reminded me every day that he went to a university,
and I didn't.
And he made it really clear that he was here and I was there,
and I was intimidated and feelful by the guy with the guy,
and I had lots of internal dialogue about ways I can more than just character assassinate him.
Right.
Are you with me?
And then he would talk to me and I would be fearful of coming up with a good idea to go recruit in Ivy League schools, which was part of my job.
And it got me.
And I had a lot of ugly language in my spirit about this guy.
And I called up my sponsor and he said, well, what's the inventory on it?
And I had to write some new inventory and discuss it with him right away.
And then I made some prayer.
Well, here's what happened.
The guy's in my path at work, and I'm looking for drama, and it wasn't there.
I was looking to get angry.
I was looking for something so I can now get him.
And it was all removed, and I was able to stand shoulder to shoulder with this guy, and here was the knee thing.
I was able to sit with this guy and figure out a game plan on the next business trips that we had to these different schools and get these these kids interested in our company
Without being gun shy without being intimidated without being better than just shoulder to shoulder and I was looking for drama and I couldn't get it
There was a gentleman I work with when I was on the waterfront and he did some really unkind things to my dad really unkind things
not with his hands, but with his mouth.
And my dad was about to experience some really severe consequences because of what this person did.
And so I was on a mission.
John Wayne, that character was in full, you know, flight.
And I was going to track this guy down and show him what I thought of him, right?
Right.
But my sponsor of every wise man had me write inventory on this guy.
And all the fear and all the anger, all of it.
And I'm working with inventory.
And I'm working with a lot of prayer and meditation.
Father fill my heart with a spirit of forgiveness.
They only know what they know.
Great words, the carpenter says, forgive them for they know not what they do.
Can I work with that?
Well, I'm going to pick up a dear friend of mine and we're on a way to a meeting and I get lost.
I'm in Staten Island.
I get lost.
And I turned down this block and I see someone jogging and I thought it was one of us.
I said, I know that guy. I think he's in the rooms.
And it wasn't. It was this guy will call him Bill.
And I looked at him, I swear nothing.
And I try to replay the old stuff so I can do John Wayne with this guy.
Jump out of the car, Tony Soprano, jump out of the car, you know.
Do all of that, right?
Which if you know me, I'm not a fighter anyway.
But my mind says, yeah, you can go fight.
I'm looking for something, replaying the stuff he did.
There was nothing.
Absolutely nothing.
And he just jog right past me.
For a moment, I was frustrated that I couldn't get angry.
And then I realized how free I was,
because that was something that was a thorn in my side for the longest time.
And I could not get angry.
I was free.
And I went to pick up my friend Tom.
We went over to the Way Out group and had a great meeting.
When I got home that night, I called up my sponsor.
He says, here's the experience I had a few hours ago.
And his question to me was, well, why did you doubt God in the first place?
See, we take this booze problem to God.
Take this from me because you're the only one who's going to take this from me.
But the rest of my life, I can probably manage.
And we treat us, one of my teachers says we treat God like a person and person like God.
Turn to my buddy and say, listen, you need to do this for me.
And I expect that he's going to do it absolutely perfect, divinely perfect without missing a beat.
And I put all the shovel expectations into this guy's lap.
And he or she fall short.
And I'm angry.
Didn't you listen to what I said?
Weren't you paying attention?
Right?
We do that to our spouse all the time, right?
But I go to God and, oh, he ain't going to pay attention to this.
I don't have expectation that God's going to fix this.
I got it backwards.
My perceptions were backwards.
And here was a perfect incident that I got past.
It says on the bottom of page 84, I've ceased fighting anything or anyone, even alcohol.
Am I currently, in my mind, my internal dialogue, am I fighting with anyone, even though they're not here?
What's that look like when I'm all alone?
How am I doing with that?
For this, by this time, sanity will have returned back in step two.
We return into this power to restore us to sanity.
And step 10, they deliver the contract.
Here it is.
You restore it to sanity now.
Wholeness of mind.
You're not thinking about drinking, are you?
You're free.
Just what we promise you.
Just what God said, I'm going to deliver, he delivers.
He delivers.
For some of us, we experience it before we even get to 10, before we get to enter the world of the spirit.
But by 10, we've got it, assuming we have followed directions.
Can I take my fear there?
Can I take my sex life there, my relationship life there, my diet and health to this power?
Can he take me past where I currently am to a better place?
Do I think that this is it, got free from alcohol, and the rest I'm stuck with?
Or do I think on my own power I'm going to get past that stuff?
Or am I willing to take everything to God?
My sex life, my relationships, my money, my job, my health, everything.
It says, for by this time, Sammy will have returned.
We will seldom be interested in liquor.
If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame.
We react sanely and normally, and we find that this has happened automatically.
I don't have to wheel myself into this.
It's done for me.
Can I say that about other areas of my life where I may be experiencing some trouble,
the sprees that we may get?
By following this work, can I say that about other areas
or am I trying to get me past, my be devilments if I'm experiencing any of them?
We will see that a new attitude towards look has been given us without any thought our effort on our part.
It just comes.
That is the miracle of it.
We're not fighting it, neither.
Are we avoiding temptation?
It says, we've been placed in a position of neutrality, safe, and protected.
The problem does not exist.
It's been removed.
We are now recovered.
At this place, we get recovered.
How's that looking for me?
Inventory...
There seems to be two schools of thought.
One is you don't write out inventory with regards to Step 10, others you do.
I was brought up with writing.
The only difference is I was passed something on, something was passed on to me.
I got attached to writing a lot, a lot.
It got me free, and I continue to write.
But what was presented to me was what our big book says,
that a business which takes no regular inventory usually goes broke.
But a business which is always taking inventory will go broke too because they're never open for business.
And I've seen people in here who claim to be on this path with their lips who are in the book.
Constantly got to go through new drama, more inventory, new drama, give me drama so I can write more inventory.
And never being open and the experience that they have go share and go work with others.
And also, okay, time to go through the work again, but they're always in there.
I attend the big book meeting.
somewhere. And there's a lot of people who are on this path, but three closet of the room is
attached to drama, is in drama, reworking, rework and more inventory and more, which is a
neat thing, but no one's getting free. They're attached to the methodology, they're attached to
the mechanics, they're attached to the writing, and they don't have time to get out there
and get free or experience the freedom. So this was a great lesson for me.
But the way I work, my 10th step is when something shows up with a resentment or a fear of something that my mind has me thinking about tomorrow next week, I'll write it.
Resentment shows up. I'll make prayer. Still there. I write. Discuss it with someone and then I work with immediately if it's not going.
What about the job interview next week, the wedding next week? You know.
The doctor's appointment tomorrow.
And I got that thing going on.
Job interview.
My sponsor said it best, need a job, got to get a job.
I need a job, got to get a job.
Oh no, they call me for a job.
You know, they want to hire me now?
It's constantly going on.
What the mind says is impossible, the spirit always proves to be possible, and I forget that.
So what about that stuff that I'm looking at?
Do I need to show up in a job interview, a wreck and full of self-reliance?
or the job interview next week, which is troubling me tonight, Tuesday, I can get home and write some fear inventory on what's going on with me, discuss it with someone, and go to that interview with God, and go to that doctor's appointment with God, go to that wedding where Uncle Joe is going to be drinking again with God.
And I can be there when I get there.
I can be present.
It says it's easy to leap on a spiritual program of action, rest on my accomplishments.
I'm headed for trouble if I do for alcohol is a subtle foe, subtle, sly, clever, devious and difficult to detect,
and a foe is my personal enemy.
That's what I'm up against.
I'm not cured of alcoholism. What I have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of my spiritual condition.
Every day I must carry a vision of God's will into all my activities.
How does that look for me? Am I carrying a vision? Am I willing to carry a vision of God's won't all my activities?
Even though the vision of God's will is contrary to my will, I was sharing with someone yesterday.
You know, how do you know the difference between my will and God's will?
Why, I know what God's will isn't, and that starts to clear up the picture a little bit, right?
But, you know, you're sitting down, you're looking through the meeting book,
and there's that fancy meeting in some nice town where everyone shows up on Saturday, looking good,
they smell great, everyone's going out after the meeting, not too much work, it's a social event.
We all have one of those meetings we've attended from time to time, right?
It's a nice place to go to.
I want to go there.
Yeah.
And suddenly, Spirit says, no, you need to go down to the Bowery,
where it doesn't look so nice.
It doesn't smell so nice.
But I need you to do service down there.
And suddenly, we're stuck as what's God's will for me tonight.
Carrying a vision of God's will into all my activities means taking some action.
I can go to that meeting any time.
But tonight, I'm being moved to go down there.
And contrary to what I want to do, God's got me going here, so I go.
And it's always great when I get there.
God's will for me, my experience has proven, is fulfilling.
I'm full.
When I'm done, when I'm done with my will, I have guilt, remorse, uncertainty, insecurity,
the wrestling, the internal dialogue, the woulda, could or shoulda, God's will I go, and I'm full.
How many meetings do we go to, and the topic is, experientially, tonight we're going to talk about
what it's like carrying a vision of God's want to all activities.
That's what you'll hear, and they won't invite you back.
What's that look like for us?
How can I best serve thee?
Thy will not mind be done?
These are thoughts which must go with me constantly.
Am I doing this?
It says my life of walking meditation.
We can exercise our willpower along this line,
or we wish it's the proper use of the will.
The bottom of the next paragraph it says,
we've begun to develop this vital sixth sense,
but we must go further.
And that means more action.
So again, my book is telling me to move
and we're developing this vital six cents,
one beyond what we came here with.
We don't need to acquire anything.
We don't need to get anything.
We get to do things.
I don't need to acquire anything.
Because all we've been given, all we need for this journey, we were given when we showed up.
Not an Alcoholics Anonymous when we showed up here.
Everything we need.
A great teacher in my life sat me down and says, this work takes you home.
We go home with this work.
Everything you need for this journey, you've been given.
You don't need to acquire stuff.
What you need to do is lose stuff.
The subtraction, not addition, and not to wake up.
The less self, the more God.
The removal of contempt, prejudices, pride, ego, all manifestations of self.
And what we get is home.
And that's where we have everything we need to go out.
If anything like me, when I first shut up, I talked about that hole in the soul, the void.
that a lot of us have.
And I thought I was empty.
I was full of me.
And all the stuff that I acquired,
the pomp, the calamity,
to worship of other things,
fill in the blank, I had it,
and it was not working.
It was not working for me.
And it all had to go.
removal. That's why the work for some of us is painful, uncomfortable, drastic and revolutionary
proposals. Who cares to commit complete defeat? Not only in one, but looking at cell phone and say,
this is what I've accomplished. I don't want to be this anymore. It's got to go. I don't need to
acquire anything. I just need to get rid of stuff and God will do it. So I show up to the work
willing and let the work take me.
So I work with inventory throughout the day.
I'll write four column inventory.
I'll discuss it.
Those are the mechanics, the resentment, the cause, what it affects me, my part, where I was at fault.
Write the fear inventory, and then I move.
Step 11.
It talks about evening and what to do during the day.
They ask us some question for an evening review.
My current practices, when I wake up, I'll work with prayer, I'll work with meditation.
In the afternoon, I work with the religious practice for the longest time now.
And that's just my thing.
I was moved to work with this religious practice and...
That's what I've been working with.
And after I get done with this prayer and this practice, I say I go silent.
And in the evening, I do the same, prayer meditation.
I got attached to reading a lot of these books that we have out there, all neat books.
But I had to read this book, and I had to read that.
Oh, no, I got to read this book.
If you ask me what I read, I don't know.
I couldn't wait to turn the page to get it out of the way.
That was a red flag.
No need to read.
That was becoming God rather than God.
So what I've learned is when I'm inspired to read, I read.
When I'm not, I don't.
I'm worshipping God, not the book, not even this big book.
In the evening, what I do, I mean, if I retire and it's 8 o'clock and I'm in for tonight, I'll write review.
If it's 11 o'clock, I'll write review.
If I missed anything during the day because I get the opportunity to write during the day, anything's lingering in the evening, I'll just put it on paper.
Rather than waking up on Tuesday, with Monday night stuff.
You know, like today's answers are tomorrow's problems.
We don't want that.
It's our right review.
In the day, it talks about...
We consider our plans for the day.
It says on awakening, let us think about the 24 hours ahead.
I consider my plans for the day.
Before I begin, I ask God, God to direct my thinking that it's divorced from self-pity, dishonest, and self-seeking motives.
There's the doing in the 11th step to work, shopping, pick up the kids, the doing we do, the tasks we do throughout the day.
But one of the things I need to consider is what kind of spirit am I taking into those affairs?
How do I be when I'm going to work?
Is God direct in my thinking?
Am I being moved by God or moved by me?
How does that look when I'm stuck in traffic on the Garden State?
And I've got to be there 7 o'clock and it's 10 to and I know I'm going to be late
when there's a big line at the shopping store.
And I need to get out in a hurry.
How do I be in all those affairs?
The first time I meditated, I sat with a non-AA member.
who showed me, she showed me some great techniques.
And she literally put me on this timer for two minutes.
Be still for two minutes.
It was about six months.
I was in, I was in, I was in, I was in, I was in, I was in,
I was in, I was in, I was in, I couldn't wait for it to get over.
My mind was all over the place.
Two minutes still, not doing anything, was unbearable.
But I was willing, and I worked with that.
And then it became three minutes, and then it became five minutes, and I'm working, I'm working.
And suddenly, the timer was removed, and I got to get silent.
I got to get still, at the very least still.
I heard a gentleman say, you know, we'll spend an hour and a half figuring out the suit, shirt, tie, the shoes match with the belt.
Everything's good, hair's good.
It takes two hours.
Five seconds.
Hi, God, got to go.
And we wonder why we're a collision with everything, because I'm running the show.
So I make the practice. I dedicate the time. I give that time the worship it deserves early in the morning and the evening in the middle of the day.
The meditation has evolved for me and I have been quick to see where religious people are right.
I make use of what they offer. And one of the things that really moved me there was 9-11.
I was forced almost to go seek out religious people and make use of what they had to offer
because my back was against the wall and I was doubting all over the place.
There was something underneath that, something way underneath that, that said everything's okay,
pray for all, but I need to be quick to see religious people right,
and the benefits for me were great, so I continued to do it, not resting on my laurels with that.
Reading inspirational books, not to gain knowledge, so my ego gets stroked.
And I come back to Home Group and throw out some pearls of wisdom, fix my collar, and walk out like I'm a guru.
That is the happiness, the quick fix.
I read to experience.
I read to be with the books.
So I wake up.
And I've read many books.
I've been working with something for, it's a few years now, by the guidance of my sponsor, this thing called intent, the power of intent.
Right.
and turning to this power to see things, materialism in my life, if they're according to God's will for me,
not petitioning God, just see it happening.
And for me, it started with physical health.
I was talking about God, talking about prayer meditation, and go out to the parking lot and be out of breath.
I couldn't button my pants.
I was feeling sluggish.
I was out of shape.
But claiming God.
And that got painful.
I bottomed out.
And I wanted to go take care of myself.
I just lacked the power.
And I started working with this and see it happening.
See it manifesting.
From the unmanifested to the manifest.
See it happening.
Turn into this power.
Meditating with it.
As I did say with the sacraments of penance, work with that.
And then I found myself on a treadmill.
And then I found myself careful of what I was eating.
And then joining a health club.
And that's been a few years.
And I take care of this gift God gave me.
Practice of no name in meditation.
Tremendous practice scared the hell out of me when I first did it.
The dramas I was talking about earlier, my name, Peter Marinelli, means something to me.
All the things that have made me where I am.
All the drama, all the challenges, all the disappointments,
and the ringleader is my thinking mind that tells Peter Marinelli can do this.
Cannot do a lot.
Attachments. You say Peter Marinelli, I get a vision of what I cannot do.
And the judge in my mind tells me you can't do this.
And that's how I go about my business.
I need something to make me who I think I am.
There's someone who calls a false sense of self.
This is who makes me, Peter Marinelli.
And just let's keep adding to that so I can feel like me.
Sure, nothing ever works out for me.
I'll never get that job because I'm Peter Marinelli.
I'll never be rich because I'm Peter Marnelli.
You know, think bad thing that because I'm Peter Marinelli, you know.
Can't do what those people do because I'm Peter Marinelli.
I mean, what's in a name?
Aren't we beyond name?
We literally can be called numbers.
Does it make a difference?
What is it for?
Identification.
When I yell out, Joe, Joe turns around.
That's how I know Joe.
Unless you're in Brooklyn, you yell out Anthony,
55 guys turn around the same room,
but that's a whole other thing all the other.
It's about 20 Anthony's in my family.
I think they would change a little bit, right?
So I was told to sit in this meditation and remove the name.
Spirit, just spirit, no name. It was uncomfortable, no name, just spirit. It gave depth and weight to what I've heard for years in here that where spiritual beings have a human experience.
I don't have to say, okay, God, whenever you're ready for me, I'm going.
God's saying, let's go, and I go with God.
That practice showed up in my life by me getting to do things and having the power and the courage to do things that would never have been possible for me.
And more importantly, being freer.
The work we get to do in here with the disciplines in 10 and 11 are way beyond this meeting, way beyond the book, way beyond Alcoholics Anonymous,
way beyond any religious community we may belong to because the point is to experiencing the glory of God.
Tremendous stuff.
And yet we'll go to contemporary AA meetings
and we'll hear, all I have to do today is not drink
and I'm a winner, just put the plug in a jug.
You didn't drink today, you're a winner.
Great.
Let me bring love there, even if there's no love in that room.
Let me bring love, I'll experience love.
Let me bring love to those people too
rather than character assassinate them.
I'll challenge what they do, but I won't character assassinate them.
But that information sure changes what we can get to do in here.
I don't think I talked about drinking
more than a couple of times tonight.
And when we're awake, we're not talking about drinking.
We'll use it to talk to a new person or to remember our experiences,
but we're talking about growing up spiritually.
Step 12.
Page 89 says practical experience shows that nothing will so much ensure immunity from drinking
as intensive work with alcoholics.
Other alcoholics.
Tremendous promises a promise.
Immunity from drinking with intensive work with other drunks.
Not like, here's my number, give me a call.
Sitting down with somebody and moving them through the book.
However, God inspires move the book, whether it's line by line, paragraph,
bullet the book, we sit down and work with another drunk intensely
and watch them wake up.
We carry this message to our alcoholics.
We can help when no one else can.
We can secure their confidence when others fail.
I remember to myself they are very ill.
Has my life taken on new meaning?
Have I watched other people recover and watch them help others?
Have I seen lowliness vanish?
Have I seen a fellowship group around them and me?
Is it one of the bright spots in my life working with other people?
Even the prospect who's really challenged you, where you've got to really work with.
One of the neatest things I've experienced in here is you get that person where the light in the eyes is out.
they're at the bitter end, and they show whether it's after treatment or coming back to AA.
And even the person's been around here for a long time, and it just got untreated.
And thinking about drinking or taking their life, right?
And you begin to work with them.
This is the great power we get that we're no longer powerless and Alcoholics Anonymous.
We get to work with those people, and they start to wake up.
And then you walk into Home Group 20 minutes early, and they're up on the stage or in the corner or in the car,
and they're sitting with a prospect.
Call me when you want to drink.
Yeah.
they're working with others.
And then that prospect is working with others.
I belong to a group called The Way Out Group for a few years in Staten Island.
It was a bright spot, one of the bright spots in my life.
It was just such a neat place to be.
And one of the neatest things about the group was I would get there always about an hour early.
I just like being around the place.
And out in the park benches that we had there, there'll be two people here, two people there, a couple of people there sitting in the car, walk into the meeting room, a couple of people in a chair, up in a library, a couple of people sitting there.
There are people working all over the place with each other.
And then we go in for the meeting and to share our experiences on recovering.
What a place to be.
How often we walk into our home group and, you know, we have the mindless chatter that goes on, did you watch the game, how's the weather, but that's all we discuss.
Never, how's it going for you?
How's practice going?
How's meditation?
How you doing with the men's?
You know, where are you right now in the work?
I walk into some groups.
We'll gossip about the whole planet.
Let's be spiritual now.
I only have a few minutes.
The part of Step 12 is about, you know, carrying this message throughout alcoholics.
And in that is what a home group is doing, is my home group carrying the great fact or not?
What am I doing as a sponsor?
Am I endorsing someone's delusional mind or am I, you know, pulling the covers when I need to?
Am I passing on the message in this book, my experience from this book or not?
Because for me, and my experience has shown me over and over again, if I look at a group that's getting sick, I go to the eldest statesman, if they have any, if someone is in a meeting and is around here for a while and they're untreated, I don't go to them, I go to the sponsor, sick prospect, probably a sick sponsor, certainly a sick prospect. We can't transmit something we haven't got up, books us. And we will what we do, and sometimes that's untreated alcoholism.
tremendous responsibility we have been passing this message on.
How am I doing? How's my group doing?
And am I taking this message to the choir all the time?
Or am I taking this message to the meeting on the Bowery,
where I may experience a lot of resistance in those contemporary A.A.
Meetings will go down to the Bowery where it's rough going,
but pass the message on and maybe, maybe plant the seed and someone will get free and live.
The 12-step calls, I've done a lot of them.
They got ugly. They were easy. But it's where God moved me and gave me the power to move through.
But I always share about what I feel is the perfect 12-step call.
Out of a vision for you, and then it talks again about it in Bill Dotson's story.
Lots of times in Alcoholics Anonymous, we're worried about offending the new drunk.
Don't talk about God. You may scare him out.
Be careful. He's new. Watch his feelings or her feelings. Don't, you know, give them the truth, and we'll lie to we're drunk.
Let's talk about your issues today, Joe.
Let's talk about your feelings and your dysfunctional family.
You know what?
Let's talk about all your enablers.
And we get more angry then than before we showed up, right?
Here's what Bill and Bob do.
Bill Dotson's laying in the hospital.
And they go up there.
It says on page 156...
Very bottom. Here was a prospect all right, Bill Dotson. By the description, not too promising, the use of spiritual principles in such cases was not so well understood as it is now. One of the friends said, put him in a private room will be down. And he says, when they walk in, who are you fellows? Why this private room, I was always in a ward before? And the way this was explained to me when you went from the ward to a private room, it usually meant you were in serious trouble.
So he's laying in this prior room saying, I did it this time.
I probably going to die.
And I got these two strangers walk into my room, right?
Said one of the visitors, we're giving you treatment for alcoholism.
They didn't say we want to know about your dysfunctional family and your childhood.
We're going to treat you for alcoholism.
That's why they're there.
And in doing so, they'll save themselves, right?
Right.
It says hopelessness was written large on a man's face as he replied,
that's no use.
Nothing's going to fix me.
I'm a garner.
The last three times it got drunk on the way home.
It says in the next paragraph, for an hour, the two friends, the two AA guys, told them of their drinking experiences.
They anted up for identification.
They baited them.
This is our drinking story.
They didn't go in with a holy than thou.
They got down to where the guy used spoke his language.
What happens? Over and over, Bill Dotson, the alcoholic number three says,
that's me, that's me, I drink like that, identification, one drunk with another.
He understood their stories. He understood where they had been.
The man on the bed was told of the acute poisoning from which he suffered and how it deteriorates the body.
They talked about the body and how it warps his mind.
There was much talk about the mental state preceding the first drink.
They ante up. They tell the guy about the physical part.
They tell the guy about the mental part.
They don't hold back.
They give him what he's up against.
He said, that's me.
The very image.
He says, you fellows know your stuff are right, but I don't see what good it'll do.
At this, a couple of sentences out, this, both the visitors burst into a laugh.
It says the two friends spoke of their spiritual experience and told him about the course of action they carried out.
They give him, they ante up for the guy, they tell their story.
They give him the body stuff.
They give him the mind stuff.
Then they talk about the spiritual and talk about God.
And what's even better than that, the course of action they took to get there.
They laid out what they did.
You know what happened to this guy?
After about three days, he considered some things that God be able to help him.
He never drank again.
Bang, bang.
Next, let's go get someone else.
Rather than wasting time on the stuff we hear in a lot of contemporary AA, middle of the road stuff, problem, solution.
Do you want it? We can help. Here's what we did. Let's pull you ashore. Just hold on.
What we get to do in AA, resurrected, reborn, and God gives the power to do this.
My greatest spiritual teachers have been members, recovered members of Alcoholics Anonymous.
That's all I got. Thanks.
Okay.
Okay.
Open up questions, comments.
Alan Alcoholic.
Thanks for sharing, Peter.
I want to ask you,
the last paragraph on page 159,
going into the next paragraph from 160,
I wanted to get your take on that,
because it talks about the beginning members
and how there was three of them,
and they worked diligently for a year and a half,
and after a year and a half, there was another seven,
so there was 10.
And then it talks about...
what type of meetings they had.
And it said that they had, they met every night in a casual, you know, get together.
And then they set aside one meeting a week where the beginner or the newcomer could bring their problems.
I just wanted to get, what was your, what's your take on that?
I mean, I don't, you know, like, what are they talking about?
My take on what?
On what are they talking about in there?
Like, you know, in...
where the beginner can, or the newcomer can bring his problems.
I mean, you speak about, you know, about how contemporary AA,
about how it's, you know, you go there and it's group therapy or whatever.
I'm just, I'm not sure exactly what they meant in there.
Is it when they say to bring their problems, are they talking about the alcoholic problem?
Or, I mean, I don't know the history of AA as much as you guys do.
Are they talking about you can actually...
the beginners actually go there and talk about what's going on in their life, their problems.
You know what I'm saying?
I mean, because it took them a year and a half to get ten people,
so obviously they weren't getting many people to follow them around.
And there wasn't much group therapy going on,
because otherwise they would have had a ton of people.
But, you know what I'm saying?
A lot of what was going on was going to work with others.
They were doing work.
having an experience and immediately going to work with others.
And they couldn't make 90 meetings in 90 days because it says they went to a meeting a week.
And what the neat part was, the family was welcome to those places.
And they brought everything there and they would meet.
After the meeting, the families would get together.
Back home in Brooklyn, we have coffee breaks in the middle of the meeting.
Well, we get up now and go for coffee.
That stuff was set aside after the meeting was over.
So it was about what we can do to help others.
And a friend who's passed on shared a lot of that stuff with me as to what they did in those places.
When I talk about the contemporary AA, I'm talking about sitting down at a meeting and hearing someone say,
just put the plug in a jug, make 90 meetings in 90 days, don't drink and go to meetings, play sober softball,
the steps will get you, do a step a year.
They weren't talking about that stuff.
I can come to you and say, hey, Al, this is my drama right now.
And you were not going to tell me back then, double up on your meetings, Pete.
Okay, we're going to work you through this.
God's the solution.
We're going to help you get past this.
But what we're going to be doing all the time is working with other drunks.
See the difference between the two?
How many meetings do we go into?
And, okay, anyone want to start off with a topic tonight?
My cat died.
Thirty people take an hour on their pets dying,
and the new person sitting in the back,
the first meeting is wondering, this is AA.
Rather than, let's take that cat stuff,
and it's painful, we'll go to the diner with that later.
Let's talk about how we recovered from alcoholism.
You're having financial troubles, you're having a relationship troubles.
We'll share our experience on how we got past that.
God being a solution.
Make a little clearer?
Mm-hmm.
Right here?
No.
Okay.
Hey, P.U. Thanks for coming down this past couple weeks.
Could you give some little more specifics on the meditation, you know, maybe just some things you do or maybe some other things here, other people do?
As far as, you know, like, you know, sitting down, how do you sit down? You sit on a couch. You lie down. Do you stand up?
You know, like, practically, you know, what do you do? You know, when you wake up an hour early, I mean, you know, like, you know, I pray and, you know, I'm not a very good meditator. I'd never been.
Yeah.
I could use it, so, you know, you could maybe expand a little more on, you know, like, practically.
I mean, what do you do?
First things first, what I was talking about earlier, the no-name stuff, if you heard what you just said, gave you a meditation tape?
Okay.
That answers that question.
Okay.
You said something that's really neat, though.
I have never been able to meditate.
I have never been a meditator.
That go back to the no-name stuff.
Your name, you can't do that.
That's what you're saying.
I've never been able to do it, therefore I can't do it.
So I'm probably never going to grow in this area, right?
There are lots of books out there, lots of CDs out there,
on how to do this, from trying it for the first time to as we evolved with this.
But to answer part of your question, because we don't have enough time, and we can talk about this afterwards.
Posture and breath.
Some of us sit.
Some of us sit in a chair or get in a posture on a meditation mat, posture and breath.
The two things that I was told from the very beginning.
You'll see a meeting.
Okay, we're going to have three minutes of meditation before the meeting.
We can't.
Or lean over posture and breath.
Okay.
And it isn't because God's saying, hey, Joe, your posture is wrong, so therefore you're not going to experience me.
It's for us, posture and breath.
And we can, the breathing, every book I've studied with meditation talked about breath.
Now, maybe there's books out there that don't talk about breath.
But I haven't gotten to one yet.
Every book I've read talks about breath.
I saw a gentleman who has a Jillian books out.
One of my heroes, and I got to see him in person.
And he had all his students out on stage.
And about 500 people did this, like, 40-minute meditation and this chanting.
And he begins to speak.
And I'm waiting for these glorious words about he's going to give me the secret to meditation that no one else knows.
You know what he talked about?
Over and over and over.
Breath.
I was flawed breath.
Breath.
I was just wondering, your spiritual experience, was it incremental or was it a sudden?
Great question. A book says sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly, to build W experience or the educational variety over time.
Here's what I found out. That best answers that question. When God shows up, God shows up, and it's profound. It's sudden. It's revolutionizing.
We may get it, spoon-fed to us.
But when we finally wake up that something's different, it feels profound.
So there were people looking at me saying, you've changed, you're changing.
You don't see it, and I didn't.
And then one day it blasts upon me, that my whole life was different,
my whole thinking was different, and it was completely uplifting.
When God shows up, God shows up.
I'd have to say from an intellectual place that it was probably over time.
But I don't like to say that because I just woke up to it and that's how my mind reflects upon it.
If I think back to things that happened to me, they were all profound moments.
For example, I was in a halfway house in Hastings, Minnesota.
Town population was me and a cow, basically.
I was in.
And I'm in serious trouble.
And they told me to pray.
And I'm praying like the desperate for Johnny Man.
And I'm just, God, please.
I don't want to go back to where I just left off.
I'm just squeezing hands together, please.
I have one pair of pants and a shirt to my life
and an old pair of sneakers that were given to me.
And I'm living in this halfway house.
And it was a Saturday, not yet noon.
I can't find out.
I've shared this maybe three times in my life.
There was some guys outside playing basketball.
And I finished praying.
And I'm telling desperate prayer.
Please don't take me back to what I just left off.
I'll do anything.
Pray.
Keep me clean and sober.
And I sat on the edge of the bed and then something happened.
I didn't know it until it was over.
But there was something that went on within me that I can't describe.
But it was the most comfort or bliss.
I don't know if it lasted for a minute or an hour.
I have no idea.
What I do remember is two things.
I looked around the room and it looked different,
like as if I wasn't in the same room for a brief moment.
The guys who were playing basketball, they were really loud.
They were right below my window.
When I was done with that experience, I realized I didn't hear them.
When I got out of that place, they were going again.
I heard them, and I said, I didn't hear them.
It was an incredible thing that went on within me.
And it was one of the first...
tastes of, I think I'm going to be okay.
I couldn't describe it at the time.
I know what it is now.
But I could not say, well, I just had a God experience.
Let me go to Home Group and share.
It was too great to even share.
It was too pure to take away inner sharing.
Maybe that's why I've only shared this a couple of times in my whole sober life.
So we can say little by slowly, but when we get that stuff, something happens.
Yeah.
And what came out of that was that first little thing of, I think I'm going to be okay.
And I couldn't describe that suit.
Until I get, I have this bad tendency of waiting, I'm Susan, I'm an alcoholic,
this bad tendency of waiting until my life gets chaotic of getting back to doing the right things
and getting back into order.
I get real lazy in between.
It's a pattern.
Right.
I've been sober, a few 24s, but I don't want to drink, and God's been really good to me.
But a lot of difficult things have been going on financially with work and the contract crashed,
and I don't have a job.
A lot of the things you just said, I was like, oh, man, God equals silence and, you know,
get out of my own brain.
But I guess my question is, how do you stay?
I repeatedly, Peter, I've known you since Staten Island when I got sober,
and I repeatedly hear that you stay on the path.
And I want to know how you stay so diligent.
In the times when it's easy, you know, you get caught up in the job,
and everything seems to be going good, and I'm starting to pay the bills off.
And, you know, I recently made a huge move from the West Coast,
and I just, I'm starting to go, whoa, you know,
and it all kind of crashed through last week.
And I'm back to the basics, but that's where I seem to go.
And God always seems to be there.
And I'm sure he's there in between, but, you know, I'm probably not giving back.
And I guess I want to know what, how do you stay so diligent, you know, and level and balanced?
I have a problem with balance.
First things first, I've taken no credit for anything good in my life.
I'll take full responsibility or anything I screw up and fall short.
I got real clear, real clear.
Of myself, I am nothing to Father do with the works.
I got real clear on that.
I got real clear on what happens to me when I move away from this.
I got really clear on that.
And I got really clear on praying for willingness to do this work.
You've heard me shared a million times from doing these type of deals.
I pray for willingness as I did at the very beginning 18 years later.
I turned to my Heavenly Father.
Thank you for the willingness to continue doing this work.
Because based on me, I'm resting on my laurels and a prey to my external conditions.
I feel good.
My life is manageable.
I'm good.
Don't need to continually seek this.
Thank you.
23 to 43, those pages got me real clear on, I need to be a seeker of God, or I'll experience the or else they talk about.
And I only got clear on that, not because it's a, you know, the special club that some of us get to visit.
I got real clear on that because my life was so much in the toilet when I got here and my first six months in Alcoholics Anonymous.
And my bottoming out from time to time, I've argued with God.
I bargained with God over the last 18 years.
I try to manipulate God like I was a God stronger than God.
But I got real clear on those three things.
Of myself, I am nothing the father do with the works.
I show up to the altar like a willing student.
You point me.
I'm real clear on what happens to me when I point me.
I'm working with, I started to get into my current practice, I got away from it.
One of the things I'm praying for, not only to do this work, but I'm working with four words,
purity, honesty, unselfishness, and love.
Tall order. I'm working with that. I see little things manifesting from time to time.
That is not of me.
We're out of time. Okay, we're out of time. Thank you.