Workshop on their personal experience with working the steps in Minneapolis, MN

Well, Peter recovered Alcoholic.

Had some neat questions. Don't a break come up explaining that the third third column in step four and another gentleman had a great question going through the work. When does the spiritual experience happen?

When am I going to get mine? You know, and what I shared with him was let's not be attached to when just knowing it will different times for different people because then our big book is a complete lie. Having had a spiritual experience as a result of these steps, spiritual awakening as a result of these steps, spiritual transformation as a result of these steps. Thank you. It's a promise. So it'll happen different times for different people, sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. When God shows up,

God shows up. And then when that moment happens that words really can't adequately describe, but the words will point to that which is truth anyway,

You look back and say in reflection saying, my God, that's been happening to me for a while.

I my whole life is different. I not even thinking about drinking. My personal relationships have improved.

I haven't stolen money. I'm showing up to work on time. I'm tended towards the ones I love. I'm I'm sponsoring people. I'm experiencing this abundance of God in gratitude and perhaps even weeping right now. And there were tears of joy. But I look back in the last three months, six months, a year has been incredible, indescribably wonderful. So we'll get it,

the third column in our 4th step where it talks about pride, personal relationship, self esteem, security, ambition,

pocketbook, sex relations, all areas that we take a look at with self and our books. As we considered it carefully, considering it carefully, we can see where fear is attached in all of those areas, which becomes really a precursor for our fear inventory. We get to pull fear right out of our third column,

Pride. What does that mean? How I think others value me,

What I think you think of me, How I open up. That is, no one should see me this way. No one should know this about me.

You know, get a divorce. Fix my pride. No one should know I got divorced.

No one should see me going through a divorce. No one should see me depressed over a divorce. How I think others value me. Because my thinking with that is if you, if I'm thinking you, you judging me? You thinking less of me?

That means you don't like me. If you don't like me, you're not going to hang around with me.

If you don't hang around with me, I won't have any friends. I'll be alone. I'll be abandoned. Oh my God, I'm going to die.

Person relationships. How I think this relationship should look. We should get along. We should be friendly. We should walk shoulder to shoulder. We ought to be on the same page, right?

And you're not doing that, so I'm incredibly angry with you. Great expectation.

Treat people like God and God like people

myself esteem how I value me, how I see you'll feel about myself. Now my sponsor showed me this one. I would always write myself esteem I'm lowered in a, you know, a curb. I I'm I'm I'm awful person. I deserve all these bad things is that's not why you're resentful. It's from this way over the top self-esteem. I'm a spiritual person. I'm a caring person. I'm a loving person. I'm tender with all who come into my life.

If I'm that way, then how could you damage treat me any less than that?

It's kind of another way of saying, don't you know who I am?

I'm this great guy and you offended me. How could you do that? It's really your fault, not mine.

We get to see that

my sex relations, not only sex, but

my ideas about men and women, the roles we play. Real men do this, women do that. And it wasn't until I wrote down a thorough inventory that I got to see the judgments I put on old belief systems with women and men had a great assignment given to me once

my idea of a real man and I got to see a play out inventory. Real men are tough. Real men are rich. Real men have possessions.

Real men always work. Real men of fearless John Wayne all the time.

Can we watch a John Wayne movie? He cracks about one guy per minute. I mean, it's unbelievable. I love him,

walks in, hits you, you know, next scene hits you. I, you know real men. John Wayne, right?

Well, what about the man who's who? Who is meek? Who can't fight? That may come less than a man.

What about the man who cries? You know, real men don't cry. What about the man who's emotional it's in less than a man. What about the man who just doesn't have money? Less than a man? What about the man who can't get work? Who can't find work? He less than a man.

Got to see these things in my third column. Real men do this,

and I got to see my belief systems about women.

Women do this. Women are supposed to do that. Women are supposed to behave that way. Women are supposed to do this,

my Lord.

Completely distorted.

I got to see that, and the first time through Rheumatoid, I just got to take a look at my sexual behavior,

you know, when it was all really about me. Control and power,

security, my emotional security, what I need to be OK. I need this from you to be OK. I need that to be OK. I need her to say I love being all the time to be OK.

I love watching some folks,

the girlfriend tells him. In one day, 52 times I love you more than anything in a world right? That's on Monday. Tuesday comes into mean. The relationships over. It's over. What happened? She only told me I love you 12 times today. You know,

I need this from you to be OK. And we get to see how our sense of self is wrapped up in who I be, is wrapped up in what you think of me. That's bondage. If you don't like me, I'm ruined. There is no me. Great. Great example. They always heard about Alcoholics Anonymous. You walk into a room, there's ten people there. Nine say, hey, Pat, you look great. One guy says, hey, Pat, what happened? You don't look so good today. Guess who Pat's going home with?

Got one opinion, right? I'd walk into room. They say. Pete. Love that jacket. Looks really good on you. Love it. Where'd you buy it? I'm feeling really good. Joe comes over and says jacket doesn't fit you. Guess who I'm going home with? I got to get a new jacket. Get rid of it. I listen to the one person because my dependence, my survival is on your opinion of me. In fact, I don't even need you to prove me. I need you to worship me. That's bondage. What I need to be OK. You'll see it in relationships all the time.

All the time.

Especially relationships that are untreated to untreated. People see it all the time. It's not love, it becomes obsessions trying to have a relationship, right?

My ambition, what I want, my goal, what I want. How's that? Hurt into fear or threatened? You know, if I have a fight with my boss, my job security is hurt into fear to threaten my ambition to go to work, to have a career at this place, my ambition to have a relationship with this guy has been hurt in the field of threat. In fact, I don't even want to go to work tomorrow.

Who wants to work for him anyway?

Then he gives you a promotion. I work for the greatest guy in the world. You know,

it's all about perceptions. You ever do this, you go to a meeting and you sit down and they say tonight. Speaker is Pete and you know, no, not Pete. God, I can't stand this guys and talk about the big book. I was. Hey, Joe, is there another meeting we can go to? I hate this guy, right. And about two minutes into the talk, I say, you know, I want to thank Joe so much for helping my recovery. Suddenly Joe goes and he's a great meeting and I love Pete.

I'm glad we came tonight, Right? Perceptions, right?

Pocketbook is money.

Money. How's that hurt? Into feud or threatened? You know, if I'm writing about my boss,

my money's threatened. You know, look back over my life. How was my pocketbook affected?

And I write that out.

Very simple stuff.

They get to see how I'm playing God in column three

in every area of my life. I demand, need, want, got to have so I feel OK and my dependence is really truly upon external conditions and people. Now back in how it works, it said no human power can relieve me on my alcoholism. And I'm looking at my third column, and it's about human power and things to relieve me of my condition,

to make me feel good. Remember I said about going out there to fill that hole in the soul, to fill that void? Well, here it is. I need all this from out there to feel good. And I get to see how it's never going to happen because of my distorted perceptions of everything about life.

Now I go over to the 4th column. Where was I? Selfish, dishonor, self seeking and frightened. We do. We do a fear inventory list of fear. Why do I have the fear?

Fear of dying? Why do I have this fear?

One of my teachers had me write out all my fears. Fear of dying, fear of no money, fear of health, a fear of heights. You know, had all these fears,

silly fears, obvious fears, right?

Fear of being alone,

fear of not being in a relationship, he says. Now write the opposite of every fear.

Fear of no money. Fear of having money. Let me think about well, yeah, that means everyone's gonna want it

comes responsibility,

fear of no relationship, fear of being in a relationship. That means I have a commitment to someone. I'm responsible and accountable to someone. I don't want that either.

And we got to see in a lot of areas where it was really just about my untreated condition and my perceptions of everything. No matter what I had, I was still not right. No matter what you gave me, I was still fear. Fear is the evil and corroding thread. The fabric of our existence was shot through with it.

Evil and corroding thread. One thread through this jacket. The whole jacket disintegrates. One thread through our life of fear. The whole life disintegrates because it's manifested in thought. Were indeed coming from a place of fear. Some of us go in when we're fearful and wall up. No one's getting in. Some of us strike out when we're in fear. And I'm going to get you before you get made.

Don't worry. Indeed. Fear to evil and corroding thread. We'll see. Every area of our life is affected by fear.

Fear has free room and board and this wonderful thing called the thinking mind that we actually worship from time to time. My mind said it must be true. Let's go. My mind said I'm in fear right now, so I guess I'm in fear. My mind said, let's pick up a double Jack. OK, great, let's get drunk. Let's It's good thinking. You know we've become worshippers of our mind,

this great problem making machine where fear has free room and board. It sits right next to the Ego

sex inventory.

Make a list of relationships I've had. One of the things I've done many times is little little brief story about why I got involved in this relationship. What what were the main points in this relationship? How did it end? You know, and then I go to the questions in our big book.

Whereas I self was decided and considerate. Who did I hurt?

Very often I would write down in the section inventory. Who did. I heard horror. Well, that's obvious.

And then I got to see while I didn't only heard her, I hurt. Maybe her parents, maybe her, some of her friends, if she had children, perhaps her children, maybe my parents, maybe my family over this one relationship because of my my my my selfish and inconsiderate habits. Look outside the relationship and we see how one untreated person effects many.

Did I unjustifiably arouse jealousy, suspicion or bitterness?

Where was I at fault? What should have I done instead? Not could, but should

we list all these things? One sentence it takes to do this. We're not looking for some long story. I'm really taking my inventory.

No matter what she did, no matter what she said, no matter what they did, no matter what they said, it's my inventory.

It's only way we're going to get free. Rubber hits the road, Uncover, discover and discard. And truly, if I've had a real experience with step one, this is a cakewalk. No matter how much I'm getting disturbed, it beats drinking it. Beasts being in the throes of addiction,

we list some principles and off we go. One of the things in sex inventory we create the spread of sex goal and ideal.

It usually looks like the opposite of where I harmed others.

How I would like to see my future sex life. The sane and sound ideal.

Pretty much in a nutshell. Carrying a vision of God's will into that activity too.

We go sit with someone in Step 5 and pass this on.

One of the biggest warnings in a big book. Come on page 72 where it says if we skip this vital step, step five, we may not overcome drinking. My book just warned me, don't do Step 5. There's a good possibility we're getting drunk again. See, we can do a searching, fearless and moral inventory and then tuck it away in a drawer and never discuss it with anyone.

But it's insufficient, incomplete. Part of the house cleaning process is pot, is Step 5, and it's really Step 5 is an extension, is Step 4. If inventory is done and tucked away and no Step 5, the four steps incomplete, it becomes completed in sharing with another person who happens to be on this path, who's objectionable and understands what we're doing and why we have to do it. Makes sense.

On page 75 it says when we decide who is to hear our story, we waste no time. We have a written inventory step four and are prepared for a long talk. We explain to our partner what we're about to do and why they have to do it. The sponsors know I read this to them.

It says he or she should realize we're engaged upon a life and death. Aaron, most people approach in this way. We'll be glad to help. They will be honored with our confidence. We pocket our pride and go to it. Illuminating every twist of character, every dark cranny of the past. Make her draw a little line right there on your page. That's the first half of this story here in step five. First half of the 5th step. Up until that point, it's about bringing us to go share.

Everything that follows is the effects produced by Step 5,

6789. The 5th step promises they may materialize for some of us soon. As we're done with step five, we may get them in 6789,

but they will happen.

Now, each time I go sit and I've gotten into sitting with more than one person hearing my fifth step, someone that my sponsor, someone, they're my sponsor, right? More people know about me or on this path, the freer I've. I've gotten more of a feeling of freedom with that.

What people know about me on this path, to hear this inventory, the freer I got.

And each time I go through, and I've done it many times, I get a little squirrelly still,

well, uneasy. Oh my God, how am I going to do this? You know,

tell them everything like a new person,

but God gives me enough to go sit down and share everything. And they always look a little bit bored about halfway through.

How many more pages you got there, you know?

Yeah. My first spots. I showed up to him with five spoon notebooks. He told me he was meditating. I think he was sleeping.

But each time everyone of these people have heard, they share their own experiences. They've given me insight. Yeah, this happened to me. And is it, you know, that's how I work through it. Is it possible it's really this and not that, You know, gave me direction, shared their own experiences. And I get through it. Now, when I hear a fifth step, there's a couple of things, a few things I do. First, I know the person coming to my house to share their 4th step with me is a little uneasy, a little uncomfortable about it,

right? Haven't met anyone come to Mouse and say I can't wait to give you my 4th step. They're always real kind of quiet, you know, close to the ground, walking in a door. I know that

and I greet them and give them the same love and compassion that was given to me each and every time I share with someone

with no judgments in my preparation for that is, I go into sacred silence and I ask God, make me an instrument.

Allow me to carry a vision of your will to this activity right now. I know why this person is here. I know the importance of this

and they'll get to my house and we'll do some reading.

We'll make prayer together. We'll get still. And then off we go. And they start reading to me.

And what I do is I keep a notepad in a pen next to me because while they're reading to me, I'm going to listen to what they're saying. I'm going to listen to what they're not saying. I'm going to watch their body language too, when they're talking. Usually when it gets down to sex inventory, people are giving you like, you know, sex inventory did this. They don't look at the page. They're all wrapped up in a ball. They're still full of shame, a lot of guilt. I can see that. I can see what they're talking about. Resentment with someone how their body postures suddenly gets really aggressive.

This one, they're serious with them. They're really angry with this person.

I watch, I look for that. What I do with a notepad and pen is I take notes. A lot of things keep showing up. Different people, same thing over and over and over again. So when we get to page 20, I can say, hey, Joe, remember you talked about this back on the 1st resentment. You see how it's been showing up. Is it possible consideration? Is it possible consideration? Is it possible consideration? Have it all in front of me and I start to see these same defects showing up over and over and over again.

And not only helps me hear them better, but it helps them

for defects of character in six and seven

because they get that list to go home and sit within that hour. Just for some consideration.

Now my time in a fifth step, I, I'm not one of these marathoners. I go Max 4 hours. If we're not done, we need to make another appointment. My job is to be of maximum service to you. And if I'm just listening with a dead ear, I'm not of service to you. And I start to wear out around three hours and I'll hang in there for four hours. If you're not done, we'll visit again, you know,

and we'll do the whole process. We'll finish it.

I had a gentleman come to my house. Always love to share this story. We get these guys that come to our house, you know, they're just still full of self. And the ego really hasn't been broken yet.

And this gentleman will call him Joe as comes to my house. And with sitting down and he's writing, reading me his fourth step and inventory after inventory after inventory, he goes all over and he's given me. Yeah, but let me explain.

Know that you know resentment, you know them. They did this to me. Let me explain really what happened.

I let them know on the front end. I'm going to stop you during inventory. When you're reading to me, I'm going to ask you some questions.

If I don't stop you, then just read exactly what's on paper. I don't need you editing. We don't need ego coming into this. Read exactly what you put on paper. That's what God gave you. That's what I want to hear. I don't want to hear drama

if I ask you answer. Other than that your job is to read today. You know Alcoholics, we love drama, right?

You got any drama? I'm looking for drama. Let's invent trauma. Let's make up drama. But I need drama, you know?

So we eliminate that.

Well, this guy comes to my house, and he's. Yeah, budding. Yeah, budding all over the place. And we had to take a break. I was really. I was running low on energy and going to the bathroom, cold water on my face. And I'm like, just sweating bullets. And what am I going to do with this guy? God, what do I do?

I have no clue but he's killing me.

I'm here in a fifth step sponsor. I think I need a drink,

so I make prayer and get on my knees. God, just please tell me what to do with this guy. I'm just, I don't know what you're doing. I go back into the dining room. I sit down at the table. I still don't know what what I'm going to do with this guy. And out of my mouth comes Joe. All I want you to do is read your 4th column to me. I haven't done this since, never did it before. Couldn't even believe those words came out. But it was Joe. Just read your 4th column to me. Nothing else.

Can't do that. What do you mean? He was just you know, I just read your 4th column to me and

and I saw what God gave me and why. So with some reluctance, he began to read

selfish societal self seeking fright and turn the page selfless of seeking frightened turn the page over and over and over. And then something happened that I could try to explain, but it's going to be inadequate. This guy at my dining room table split right down the middle. His ego split right in half. Something came over. This guy is like when when Bill talks about Ebby his

the boy was on fire. Something to that effect. This guy just lit up in front of me.

I remember getting like goosebumps on my arms. Oh my God. I don't know what this is, but this is incredible.

He got it

and it was by hearing his part over and over. And what we did was we crushed his ego. We didn't just have to ego to dissolve. We crushed it. It couldn't breathe. It died right in front of me and suddenly emerged this person

that was there all along, like we are what? We just have to get the stuff out of the way, get removed, sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. God gave me some words to kill this guy's ego on the spot. This guy, I used to tease him 'cause he was always looking for loopholes in any part of the book. Final loophole. Find a loophole.

This guy goes through 56789 at the 1011 and 12 and he would go to meetings. Every meeting he walked to with a big book under his arm. Any meeting, big book under his arm, passionate about giving it away, looking to sponsor people. I sat in a meeting. Go down to this Monday night meeting a handful of years ago in Staten Island, NY and he had the meeting

and I knew he was on fire. And I sat there and I listened to this guy give a talk.

I was blown away by what was coming out of him.

You know, I remember just saying thank you, God. Another one, another one is going to go do your work.

It happened by hearing this fifth step, the power that goes on, the power of God, the power we get right here in Alcoholics Anonymous. I shared last night at a meeting and and I've shared this many times that the greatest spiritual teachers God has put my path. I've been members of Alcoholics Anonymous and I've sought out many

and we go through our entire life what's written on paper and we share with someone else.

Some of us can share with just one person that just the sponsor. That's OK to do.

Some of us may want to share with personal persons, plural, more than one person. That that's what I've been on a path with lately

and it works for me. It's I experienced more freedom with that.

It also opens up the door to me sharing my daily inventory more than just one person.

In fact, I have for the last few years a couple of immediately folks. Step 10 says we discussed with someone immediately about a resentment. We have an immediately crew.

I have three guys a sponsor. I sponsor a spot, a guy. A sponsor has three guys. Another guy sponsor. He has his three guys.

It goes like this. Joe, how you doing? Listen, I haven't immediately. Do you have time?

Immediately is the buzzword. Yeah, go. Resentment, horror. She did this. Can't get past it. Tried praying. I'm stuck with this. They'll hear it. They know it's immediately. It's not like, hey, what's going on? How are you going to a meeting? That's a social call. This is an immediately. And they only call on those immediate leads.

A new guy I'm working with calls me up and

did this text thing. I hate text messages. I just

how much more anonymous, anonymous do you want to get? Now you can't even call me. What? I can't see you. But you can call me. We can talk now you can even text me, you know, anyway, And then you got to you got to see me trying to text back.

Can't even hit the button the right way. And I just call people back. Like what do you want? You know, So this guy texts me a message. Please call me urgent. So I have some accountability response by response. This guy, I call him up. I'm wondering if it's urgent, why is he texting me? Took a long time to text. I call him up and he's he's talking to me about drama,

about a girl. She don't love me anymore.

And I said then we'll call him Joe. Joe, are you about to drink? Are you thinking about drinking? No, not at all. Is anyone you know close to you thinking about drinking? No, not at all. Anyone need to go to the hospital right now? No. Do you need to go to the hospital? No. So this is not call you urgent. This is to dump on me. Have a nice day. Click.

He called me back.

You know what he called me back with?

I have some inventory to read to you, I said. Now I'll listen.

He was angry at this woman because she didn't want to be in this relationship with him, and he loaned her money and all this other jazz, and he was just upset about that and blessed. He's a great guy too. Super guy,

but I'm not going to listen to drama. I'm not going to do it. You know why? I let your illness breathe and it's not going to breathe in a phone call with me. I'm sorry. My sponsors to give guys 2 minutes got 2 minutes go

OK a few you like me till just about now. I know that

ask Chris. I'm very compassionate.

I hope

I will not entertain drama. I won't do it. You know, we have a tendency to say

my sponsor brought this to my attention because I did it.

Are you married?

It's a yes or no answer. Are you married? Yes, I am. Are you married? No. Right,

simple question requires a simple answer, but an ask an alcoholic that are you married? Well, let me

right

she know what I'm talking about.

My sponsor called me up one time and he asked me a simple question. We'll call him Joe, he says. Have you seen Joe lately? Well,

I gave him my

review of the group Joe belonged to. I gave him a review with Joe's friends and then I gave him a review about Joe before he answered. If I saw Joe lately

and he said Pete all I wanted to know if you've seen Joe. That was it.

You hear what you just did. And we're we're just great at that. That's why when someone calls me up, if it's a social call, that's different. Hey, you want to go to a ball game and, you know, just want to see how you were doing. But if you're calling me up for drama and I sponsor you, you know better.

I'm not going to endorse your realness. You know better when you signed up for me to sponsor you

now after you give me some inventory or you can call me up and be really upset, but you have inventory in front of you. I will listen to you till tomorrow morning because I know you're sincere about this phone call. You really want to get well. Your, your, your willingness is, is manifested in your actions and your actions tell me you want to get well because you're showing up with inventory. You're looking to get past this. You're not just looking for someone to dump on and then have a nice day. Trust me, when you're at this on the firing line and you're sponsoring lots of people, you can't let people dump on you. You endorse their illness.

We Alcoholics undisciplined, so we let God discipline us in a simple way we've just outlined

as a sponsor, that's a huge responsibility, and I get to do that. I'm going to help you recover, and it's not gone by entertaining your realness on this phone or when we go for coffee or when you come to my house for step work. Go talk to your therapist about that

and again I will listen when it needs to be listened to.

I had a gentleman show up to my house. Another example of this.

I have this guy write out some first step answer, some first step considerations. I just write it out. Page or two Max comes to my house has a briefcase. I was already concerned

that a new guy coming to my house with a briefcase. I'm concerned most guys come to my house who are new with the clothes on their back, right? Comes to us with a briefcase, opens up this after Shea Case. But after Shea Case, what are you doing here? I mean, you know, so he opens a book.

God's my witness.

100 pages, handwritten first step considerations.

It started from the day he was basically born. The question one of the questions were just write out briefly your your your unmanageability and consequences of your drinking. That was one of the questions. Had about 30 pages for that

I says I'll call him Joy. Still, do me a favor, go to the last page. Let me hear what's on the last page in one paragraph. He had the whole assignment done.

The rest, the other 99 1/2 pages was drama.

What service am I giving him if I listen to 99 prior pages before I got to what I needed to help him with? All right,

that guy hasn't called me since

because I told that just to told him just that.

That was the last they've seen of them.

We get done with this and we move into step six and seven and a couple of things on step 6:00 and 7:00.

Before we get there, our big book asks us some questions.

Bottom of page 75. Middle of page 75. When we get done with the 5th step, we have some 5th step promises. It says once in having taken this step. Step 5. Withholding nothing. We are delighted. Promise we can look the world in the eye. Promise we can be alone at perfect peace and ease another. Promise our fears fall from us. Promise. I begin to feel the nearness of my Creator.

Another promise. We may have had certain spiritual beliefs, but now I begin to have a spiritual experience.

Although it may be the infancy of the spiritual experience, it's happening. The gentleman and wherever he is who asked me about that. When is this spiritual experience? How? Here's what they're telling us. We begin to have this spiritual experience.

We begin to feel the nearness of our Creator.

The feeling that the drink problem has disappeared will often come strongly that that that contradicts the contemporary a a belief system, which is it's you'll. It's normal to think about a drink because you're an alcoholic. You're always going to think about a drink because you're not called, my book says. It's going to begin to disappear,

not present anymore, not thinking about it.

We will often we will feel that we're on the broad highway walking hand in hand with this spirit of universe. Those promises, promises may happen for us right after 5-6 and seven, eight and nine. I start to experience this one night up at a meeting when I was just did my seven step prayer, something boom just happened. I was kind of like electrified. I knew it. Something was different. I couldn't explain it.

Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. Tells me, tells us to go home

and we retire. When we get home, we get quiet for an hour after the fifth step

and it gives us some things to do. We thank God from the bottom of our heart that we know Him better. That's a prayer. Thank you God

for allowing me to finish. This fifth step was one of the prayers.

Thank you God, for the courage, strength and direction to go to my sponsor's house and share every intimate detail of my life with Him.

We take this book down from the shelf and return to the page which contains the 12 steps, carefully reading the 1st 5 proposals. First five steps.

We ask if we have omitted anything

for building an archway to which we're going to walk through free at last. This archway God's creating for us, we're going to go through. This archway is a squeezing that goes on. When we go through the archway we're going to go through, we're going to get free at last. When we get to the other side, many things we thought were getting us free. Our books is finally free at last. We're still in Step 5, by the way. The power that we're going to get,

it says as our work solid so far. Are the stones in the archway properly in place? If I skipped on the cement put into the foundation? Have I tried to make water without sand? Another way of saying this, our book is asking us, have I tried to sneak anything through the archway? Am I really clear on all of the work I've done?

I did some work and what I came up with is another way it says when it says we consider that we looked at the 1st 5 proposals.

Am I clear on all of those proposals

and I give this to men I sponsor with

step one. Do I believe on palace over alcohol my life's unmanageable? Do I believe I have no power, choice of control before the 1st drink in my mind and the body after I drink?

Do I believe I cannot manage my own own life? Do I believe my mind will take me back to a drink?

Do I believe that my body's quite as abnormal as my mind and my body will experience the phenomenon of craving if I pick up a drink?

Just done my fifth step. Am I still convinced of this stuff?

Do I believe I will experience a strange mental blank spot without a spiritual experience?

Am I still clear on that? I look at step 2:00. AM I still willing to accept spiritual help? And if not, no, I will experience the bitter end.

Am I still willing to have God restore me to sanity? Is everything going through God or is it going through me

in my turn of my will and life over care of me? O God,

do I believe God can and will relieve him my alcoholism? Am I willing to believe in or I do now still believe in a power greater than myself? The Step 3 considerations Am I still convinced that my life went on self will can hardly be a success finish my fifth step. Am I still convinced of that?

Am I willing to quit playing God in every area of my life and am I clear in turning my will and life over the care of God as I currently understanding my life is no longer any of my business? Am I still clear with that in Step 5?

And lastly in Step 4, have I tried to sneak anything through the archway? Lied. God won't find out.

I answer these questions. Page 76 says answer these questions to my own satisfaction, not the sponsors anymore. My book has given me a tip off. I've had a shift in consciousness. I can answer these questions honestly to my own satisfaction. Have I been thorough? Yes. Move on to six and seven. An assignment I give some folks is this.

They make a list of defects of character that were revealed to them in five and then write down the opposite of every defective character

and Ioffer this stuff to God. He's going to do what he wants anyway. Father, this is what revealed to me I've been dishonest. Thank you for honesty.

I've been hateful. Thank you for love. I've been intolerant. Thank you for tolerance. Get it?

And then I'm going to affirm that willingness with the seven step prayer. And then God's going to mold me the way He needs. I just show up to the altar as a humble student and offer this stuff to God. This is what was revealed to me. I'm willing to cut every one of these defects of character loose. Every one of them,

all my dishonesty, all my vengefulness, all my spitefulness, all my jealousy, all myself seeking all of it. And I thank you for this.

Now here's the thing about 6:00 and 7:00.

It becomes, as one of my teachers showed me, a first step for life.

Because when all is said and done, we're left with these these defects of character that are going to kill us.

And if they don't go, we'll go back to a drink. We'll go back to an untreated life. We'll go back to a drink. Six and seven becomes a first step for life. It actually takes us back home to pure in spirit again.

It takes us home six and seven to the way we were put here, free from defect.

Many times in meetings, in step six and seven meetings, you'll hear people say, well, I will never be perfect.

I'm human. I'll always have defects of character, perhaps.

Sure, I'll go along with that. But to make a bold statement as I will always be imperfect. We will always be imperfect. We will always have defects of character. That's narrow minded when it comes to the power of God. Because here's the consideration. If God, your God was loving, all loving and all powerful as you say he it or she is,

and he came down, walked into this meeting today and tapped one of us on the head and say from here on out you will be perfect without defect. Is that possible?

I have to. If my God is all love and all powerful, I have to say that's possible. I have to say that's possible because soon as I say that's impossible, my God got really small and I put him it or she in a box and I'm using me now for God. I'm using me for my outlook upon life. I'm using me as God. I'm using my thinking mind to figure out God