Q & A session at the CPH12 v9 convention in Copenhagen, Denmark

What about money? That's great. What about money? Can't seem to be getting out of debt after 3 years in the program, using too much of it. Well, you're talking to a man who owns a very large credit company.

So let me tell you a little bit about money over in America. We are so far in debt. I still think we're renting out America from the English. I haven't figured that one out yet. Do y'all have bad credit card debt here?

We're like $1,000,000,000,000. Trillions. Are you do y'all have credit cards here? Yeah. Credit cards?

Credit cards? Okay. This is what I want you to do. In prayer and meditation, this is what I do. Number 1, if you ask me whoever wrote this question, I want you to email me and I will send you my Excel spreadsheet.

That's a money calculator. It'll show you exactly your expenses, exactly your income after taxes, and then what you need to do to make that right and you need to stand by it. Financial inventory. It's a financial inventory. A daily financial inventory.

Okay? I will give you that sheet for free. I will just email that to you. Alright? The second thing I want you to do is start thinking differently.

Let's think that we have unlimited amounts of energy, unlimited amounts of wealth in the world and that you deserve it. Don't say I want money because the universe will give you the wanting. I've tested it. That's what happens. So believe in yourself.

Keep your expenses down. I will show you through doing daily inventory. When I go into wrestling season, with the high school that I'm a coach at, and I still wrestle in competition, I take a daily inventory of all my calorie intake, and I drop weight just like this. It's just a daily inventory. I do a daily inventory of my life.

Do you know that you people plan vacations more than you can, your financial future? That's why my company is so large because of lovely people like you. Right? There's 100 of millions of people out there that have no idea. I know to the penny to the penny of what I'm doing.

Am I cheap? I don't know. Frugal? Yes. But do I share a lot?

A lot. I share a lot, which gives me more money back. So what do you do about money? Please email me. I will send you that.

I want you to take a daily inventory of your, whoever wrote this, I want you to take a daily inventory starting right away, and I want you to start doing this. I want you to start paying I really don't know how much your money is, but I want you to start paying the equivalent of $5 a month to all your debt that you harm somebody else. I want you to start paying $5 a month. That's it. I'll tell you my story and how I started.

It took me 7 years, but I paid a lot more than just 5. I paid a lot, and then it all just came in. K? I've got a buddy, and, and Doug Doug knows him, who came to me, and started working with me in the mid nineties. And he was, he was in trouble with a lot of different things, and he was certainly seriously alcoholic.

He'd been in and around AA for almost 20 years and never been able to really stay sober. So they they sent him my way. And we got to the, to the 9th step, and he had he had a 120 amends that he had to do. Alright? Now a lot of it was paying the money back because he was a thief.

He was a cheating thief, and and he would just he'd had no he didn't care anything about your stuff. He would, like, borrow your car and drive it through the front window of the high school and then, you know, laugh about it. I mean, he was just a nut. Now he came to me and I said, okay. We're gonna start, we're gonna start paying this money back.

He's like, what? I'm like, we're make make a list of all these people, we're gonna start paying the money back. Now, his business was kinda he was having a hard time with his business at this time. Now he started to, started to pay the money back, and he paid this one person back. It was, he had stolen a lawnmower from a church.

And he paid the money back, and he wrote a letter, and, the the, priest of the church wanted him wanted the letter read to the congregation. It was really a nice little thing. And all of a sudden, his business got a shot in the arm. He landed a big deal. He made another amends.

He landed another deal. He did another amends. He landed. When he was done with all of his amends, within about a year, his business was doing over $1,000,000,000 in sales every single year. Multi gazillionaire.

And the money has nothing to do with it because he just lost it. Yes. He's lost it. He he made all the newspapers. It was a bad situation.

I called him up, said, how you doing? He goes, life is great. It doesn't matter. Billionaire. Just lost it all.

He life is great. He's still just helping others. And, you know, he's gonna get he's gonna get back what he needs. Probably, he knows it. You know, he's gonna get back what he needs.

But the fact of the matter is is there is a there is a correlation between your willingness to make financial amends and your financial security and health. There really is. Doug has picked out a question for me. What if you were working with someone and it is obvious to you that they don't have the allergy? Do you try and take them through the steps or tell them that they are not a real alcoholic?

You have to be very, very careful with this. What it says to do in the book, Alcoholics Anonymous, if someone has an allergy if someone's not sure about the allergies, it it tells you to tell them to step up to the barstool and try a little controlled drinking. Now, again, I'm not telling anybody who's an alcoholic to go drink, but if you can't use your personal experience, if your personal experience doesn't tell you that when you take one drink there's a craving for another drink and there's a craving for another, If your experience is if you go out to have 2, you have 2. If you go out to have 7, you have 7. If you decide not to get drunk, you don't get drunk once you start drinking, then you probably don't have the allergy.

You're probably not an alcoholic. When I've worked through the steps, I've found 3 non alcoholics, after taking, I think, about over a 100 people personally through the steps. When I when we take people through the steps in formats like this, I don't get close enough to them to really understand the first step. But 1 on 1, I've taken well over a 100 people through the steps and there's been 3 of them. 2 have been crack addicts and one of them was just a nut looking for a place to land.

And, and I've basically explained to them that they don't need to be an Alcohol But I will tell them that, look, you you know, you don't need to be here. But I will tell them that, look. You you know, you don't need to be here. It's hard enough to work this program when you know you need to work it to save your life, let alone to work it when you when you don't think you need to work it. Why don't, you know, why don't you try some other other places, some churches or, you know, become a Buddhist or, you know, a mummer, or, you know, whatever whatever you think would would help, you know.

And God bless you. Because I'll tell you what, it's better to find out that you're not an alcoholic than to find out you're an alcoholic. Because I'll I'll tell you what, when you find out you're an alcoholic, you have 2 choices. 1 is to live life along spiritual lines and the other is to die an alcoholic death. You know, there's no no door number c.

It says here, if you can't find your higher power, what are you doing? Okay. So I come in here an atheist, and I'm gonna tell you tonight at 8 o'clock, which will not be taped on my story. I'm just teasing. It will be taped.

But, I was an atheist, and so I'm gonna make this promise to you. And this might be going out on the limb. But if you work the steps to your full ability, make every amends become unbelievably free, I believe there is no way that you cannot find a higher power. I I believe I just I believe that with all my heart because that's my experience. So what did I do?

I worked these steps. I did this 9 step non stop. I paid back every restitution, and the and the 100 of 1,000 of dollars while going through a divorce, getting my total ass kicked financially. But, I always had a $20, a $50, $500, a $1,000 a month. Whatever it was, I always had something in the mail.

Always. Always, always, always, every month. Never missed. For 7 years, I paid off ungodly amounts of money. Okay?

When I actually did all this and I helped others to achieve sobriety, and watch these people come in totally beat up and then just beam with love, then go to meetings. By doing that circle in the triangle, if you don't believe that there's a god or if you don't believe that there's a higher power and you don't feel it on the inside, then there's something seriously wrong, maybe chemically, that you may need to go look at. But my experience is everyone that has truly rarely ever seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed the path. The person who has thoroughly followed the path, rarely have I not seen them get a spiritual awakening. I had one guy.

I used to bet $1,000 in the beginning that if you did not get a spiritual awakening by the 12th step, I'd give you a $1,000. One guy, Henry T. He was an attorney out of Charlottesville, Virginia, and Henry T was an atheist just like me. Bringing him through, bringing him through, bringing him through, doing the work, making the amends, comes up to the 12th step, he still doesn't have it. I'm like, oh my god.

I'm looking at my checkbook. How am I gonna give him a $1,000? So I I get on a 4 day trip and I fly. Within the 3rd day of that trip, I get a phone call. It's from it's from Henry Tay, and the pain got so great he dropped to his knees and got a humongous spiritual awakening because he went out and made his last amends and it was to this company that he was a, a lawyer for and totally hosed them.

And when he came back to the house, the whole life has changed. His whole life changed. He was one man I thought was not gonna get it, and he got it. So the answer to your question is work the steps diligently, make total 100% amends including financial amends, restitution, help others to achieve sobriety and spirituality, and you cannot not fail. You cannot not fail.

You just can't. I I haven't seen it happen yet. Here's one, and it says, do you work the steps with sponsees that have mental disorders like manic depressors, and if you do, in what way? Now the the first the 2 things I wanna make very very clear that Doug and I do not speak for Alcoholics Anonymous. We we, we set we come off with a bit of an authority because we've got a lot of experience, and and we might we might think that we speak from from, for Bill Wilson and doctor Bob from the grave.

You know, we're channeling their knowledge. We might think that, but the fact of the matter is is we really don't, speak for Alcoholics Anonymous as a whole. And I'll also state, when it gets into situations with, with medication, that we're not doctors either. So, if someone is giving you specific advice, and they're not a doctor, that may or may not be a really good thing. Now, here's my personal experience with it.

Do I do I sponsor people, that are manic depressive? I do. I I have I have several that I am sponsoring. Do I sponsor people that are on medication? Yes.

I do. I have I have several people that are on more than several, that are on one type of medication or another. I sponsor an individual who's, severely bipolar, and he's just doing a really, really great job. It says in the beginning, you know, there are those 2 that have, grave emotional and mental disorders, but they too can, can get sober if they have the capacity to be honest. I believe that, I I believe that, you you can if you work a hard enough program.

Now on the flip side of this, I do wanna state that if you're brand new and you walk through the doors of AA and your life has just gone down like the Hindenburg in a huge explosion, you're you're you you've just screwed up everything in your life. And if you were put in front of a psychiatrist, you would have every single symptom of every single disorder there is. You would be depressed. You would be you would have high high anxiety. I'll tell you what, a 100% of the alcoholics with less than 30 days have have have depression and anxiety, because you're supposed to.

You've just trashed your life. You know what I mean? So you gotta be very, very careful not to be misdiagnosed because if you go to a professional and you say, I'm really depressed, you know, I've got this, I've got this, I've got this, and they don't understand that there's a situational element to all this, like you're supposed to be depressed when you completely ruin your life, They can say, oh, you're depressed from your family. Here. Here.

Here. Here. You know? And you can get caught up in a in a in a medication cycle that you may or may not need. What I recommend is to, if you're if you're going to get advice from, from a psychiatrist or a clinic a clinical psychologist, find one that has some experience in addictive illness.

Because if they if they have experienced an addictive illness, they'll be able to spot much easier whether it's situational or clinical. Alright. You don't wanna be misdiagnosed because the fact of the matter is is it can make it a little more difficult if you're on, on a lot of different kinds of medication to, to work a spiritual program of recovery. So So I would I would just I would just be very, very cautious in being misdiagnosed. Go to somebody who really knows.

Says in this book that there are many good doctors, out there, good professionals. We need to make use of what they have to offer. But it says good doctors. Okay? I would I would say that what what what I would need to put how I would describe a good doctor is somebody that understands the addictive illness that we have, whatever that might be.

I'm really lucky. In my area, I know I know a number of, a number of really good doctors, and, and many of us do need, do need, medication maintenance. We just, you know, it's it's not unusual, and they're and they're coming up with more and more, types of medications that really do, do help a lot of the things that that, that we have. So, I wouldn't I wouldn't just say you're on medication. I'm not touching you.

I don't do that. No. And I don't do that either. And, you know, I was sitting at a table once and, doctors in America are giving out Prozac like Tic Tacs. And and I was me and one other person out of 10 were the only people not on Prozac.

So I started researching it, and this is page 52. On page 52 of the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous, they define a dry drunk. Somebody who has not worked the steps and just stopped drinking. Okay? Check this out.

If I walk into a doctor and I say this, doctor, I am having trouble with my personal relationships. I can't control my emotional nature. I'm afraid of misery and depression. I can't make a living. I had a feeling of uselessness.

I am full of fear. I am unhappy. I can't seem to be of real help to other people. If he doesn't put me on Prozac, he's committing malpractice. That's just being a dry drunk.

Work the steps, find God, help others. You won't have that anymore. Okay? I believe 2 thirds of the medication would go away. Having said that, I have truly met 3 people in my time that that had chemical imbalances.

I'm I'm dealing with one now. She's an absolute wonderful, wonderful gem of a person, and I'm learning a lot about the manics. They were all had manic, depression, and I hear it's just black and it's really, really, really black. The first thing I've told these three people is get the medication first until you get that under control, which takes months. Until you get that under control, everything else is kinda just like gray.

Am I right? And they're like, yeah. Yeah. I'm glad you understand. I'm like, well, it's just what I observed.

I I I really don't understand. I can't tell you I understand how you feel, but get the medication first. Get that get that solid. Don't start tweaking it yourself. Don't just stop.

Don't do that stuff. Okay? Get the medication first. You gotta see these people. When the medication clicks, it's like, oh, my god.

This light goes on. This this clarity comes off. Then when I bring them through the steps, it's all over. They're like this huge god, one big god consciousness. Not this pink cloud.

You know, it's forever. I've been on a a pink cloud for 13 years. You know what I mean? I just call it a god consciousness. So I'm a firm believer in that.

It talks about in the big book, you're dry drunk, you know? Find spirituality. It says, what can a person do when he is hooked on sex websites? It's destroying my spirituality. That does destroy a lot of men.

I haven't heard that, many from from women in their in their 5th step, but the the the guilt that comes from that, the the absolute, destruction of their in self, and I'm not charge judging whether it's good or bad or indifferent. I I just don't believe I don't believe that there's this fulcrum point of this is good, this is bad. I believe it's just it's all what it is in the spiritual world. It's just all what it is. I believe God has given us everything and, you know, and I truly mean that when I say he's given us everything and free will.

You know, I don't believe in this free will, but then you got these 10 things, and if you don't do this, you're going to hell. I I mean, come on. My my guy just doesn't believe him. I don't believe like that. That's just not my experience with my guy.

So if the sexual thing is really, really harming you, let's look at it. Go to the videotape, as they used to say. It's the big book. Right? So it says here it talks about in the big book about the sex.

It says, to some extent, we earnestly pray for the right ideal, for guidance in each questionable situation for sanity, and for the strength to do the right thing. If sex is troublesome, we throw ourselves the harder into helping others. We think of their needs and work with them. This takes us out of ourselves. It quiets the imperial urge when to yield, which means heartache.

And as you start doing that and helping others and watch people change, the whole sex dynamic thing will change. I don't know if you're new or not, but you'll watch it because sometimes we take our addiction and we'll act out in other ways. There's another fellowship that's very good at that, and and they show you how, you know, you'll get rid of the drugs, but it will act out another way. Same thing with alcoholism. You'll get rid of the alcoholism, but if you're truly not working the triangle in the spiritual part, you're gonna act out in other ways.

So by helping others, it talks about in the big book, that imperial urge of going on the web and looking at it. Okay? Feel uncomfortable for a while. Just feel it. Feel the uncom Don't judge yourself.

Don't say, I'm just such a scumbag. I'm blah blah. Don't do that. Start helping others because what I say to these people that are on the 3 medications and and they have the bipolar and stuff, you are here to help other bipolar people, because there's many, many, many bipolar people that are hiding here in AA, afraid to talk about it. So get out there and talk to them.

Say, get the medication. Work the steps steps. Help other bipolar people. That's why I believe you're on this earth. So that's how I would do it.

If you have hurt someone very much and done the 9th step on that person, but she won't forgive you and don't feel free until she does, what can I do? I feel that she has to forgive me. It's the mother of my child. You know, there's a couple of things in the big book that says, we may get thrown out of the office. If we do, we've made our demonstration.

It's water under the bridge. We get the freedom from the willingness to do the immense. Another thing another part here that says, there may be some wrongs that we can never fully right. We don't worry about them if we can honestly say to ourselves that we would would would write them if we could. Some people cannot be seen.

We send them an honest letter, but we don't delay. Basically, you know, I I had a situation with a boss and I went to make direct demands and he threw me out of the office. Then I went back again about 6 months to a year later, figuring he might have cooled off. He threw me out of the office again. And finally, and listen, in the last 2 years of my drinking, my active drinking, I worked for this guy.

And I was I was an I was an electrician and not a real good one at that point in time. And he he, you know, he wasn't real happy with me, on a number of levels. But threatening to bring an automatic weapon into his office and shoot everybody, you know, after after I had quit was not a good move either. He was pretty upset with that. I don't remember much of of that threat, but I was like that.

I'd get drunk and call you up and threaten you. But, and irregardless, he wouldn't see me. And this one time I went up to get my haircut and, I walked into the, the the salon and there he was over in the corner waiting to get his haircut. So I I moved over and I kinda, like, handed him in. He would he would have pretty much had to get up and knock me aside, to get get away from me.

And, you know, very respectfully, very courteously, I I kinda went into my deal and and and told him, you know, my last the last 2 years of my drinking were with you, and, you know, I know I caused you a bunch of harm and I didn't give you a full day's work and, you know and I did my deal and and I got through it. And you know, at the end of that, he he goes he he gets up and he goes, Chris, you're a young man. I mean, that's what he says to me. My alcoholism made me look 10 years older than I actually was. And when I got sober, he hadn't seen he hadn't seen me in a while.

When I when I got sober, I actually looked younger. And he and he goes, you know, every time it's right, And, you know, he he was like that. And, I'll tell you what, later on later on, I, you know, I kept, I kept moving forward with my job. He ended up becoming, somebody that that did work for me. I would hire him as a as a contractor, in some of the places that I worked, and we and we're tight.

And he's, you know, if if he's mad at me all at all, it's because I don't stop by enough and say hi. And this is somebody that threw me out. Now with, with sexual relationships, there's sometimes a lot of hurt. A lot of hurt. I know that my there's there's there's some things that my ex wife still does not forgive me for.

I've made amends. I've, you know, I've I've tried to make right everything. All the old child support's been paid and, you know, I'm actually I'm actually still paying. My my daughter is about 27 years old, but she's back living with her mother. That's what happens, by the way, in the United States.

You go out and you have a family and then you move back home with mom. You know, it happens all the time back there. And so so I'm I'm I'm trying to help support her a little bit. So some money and some, you know, things are are heading, heading out to to where she's staying. And and, you know, so I mean, I I haven't completely stopped trying to help.

But, but my ex wife is really an unrecovered, codependent, unrecovered Al Anon. She's never dealt with the things that she needed to deal with and she's still very, very angry with the world. Now I've done my part. I've done everything that I believe I can do. I can't keep going over there and begging for forgiveness.

Alright? That's not what we're supposed to do. We're this is about a demonstration. We're living a different life. We've we've made our demonstration.

It's water under the bridge, and we need to continue to keep doing the right thing. I'll tell you what happened though. I was not allowed to see my daughter after I'd gotten sober and I made my first I wasn't allowed to see my daughter. They didn't trust me. Well, slowly, the trust came back to the point where there was actually a time when my ex wife, called me up and said, would you take would you take our daughter and would she live with you?

I think I think you can actually offer her a better life if she lives with you. So I mean, it went 180 degrees to the other side where I was I was tragically alcoholic and dangerous. I mean, I burned down houses by accident. I mean, I I'd carry around handguns in a blackout. I mean, it was just really dangerous.

And I, you know, I went from there to, quite possibly offering the best, the best environment for my daughter to grow up in. And my ex wife recognized that and said, okay. She's gonna she's gonna go and live with you for a while, if that's alright. Now, time can heal most wounds. Is there gonna be a situation where someone is not gonna forgive you?

That's certainly possible. It's not probable. It's certainly possible. And I'll tell you what, it's water under the bridge. I mean, we need to learn to live with it.

We can't, we can't say our sobriety is contingent on someone forgiving us. We we we just can't do that because our sobriety is contingent on our relationship with God and how we, how we help others. You know, that same thing happened to me, after 5 years. I've been a perfect ex husband and and father and, to my 2 children. But after 5 years, for some reason, my my ex wife and I had a discussion.

She's and I said, don't you trust me? She goes, I don't trust you as far as I could throw you. 5 years. 5 years. And then that hurt.

I'm like, don't you know who I think I am? I'm like this spiritual guru. And, she I still don't trust you as far as I can throw you. And so, what happened was about another 5 years later, she still wants to play flight attendant, which is fine, but she's away from the children for about 24 days a month. And I said, listen.

There's not gonna be any more nannies. They're about ready to start high school, and there's no more nannies. So I'm gonna move to where you are. I'm gonna gonna buy Alice, and I'll take care of the kids for the next 4 years and bring them to high school. The first day that I was back, she had thrown out her back.

So I was in her bedroom, making sure she was okay. And she says, you know, I I just can't get over how much you change, and I'm so glad that you are here. Thank you for everything you have done for us. Now that's 10 years. I'm pretty patient, I guess.

I don't know. But you know what? It never bothered me what she thought. It never bothered me what she thought. That was her gig.

Nothing. Yes. I destroyed her. There's no doubt about it. But I was always perfect on the money.

I was always there when I said I was gonna be there. I took care of the children. I took care of everything. I was there emotionally, physically, mentally, and, and so whatever she wanted to think, she wanted to think, and and and that's that. I think we have time for one more.

Well, what I'd what I'd, oh, is there another one here? Do you have one? Do the steps with a sponsor. Here, this one. As a sponsor, how do you make sure that the has surrendered and is willing to do the work?

Invite him over to your house. Hey. Listen. I'm gonna be at my house from 10 to 2. Come on.

Bring your big book. Bring a highlighter and a pen. When I start working when I start working with somebody, somebody will come up and say, hey. Would you sponsor me? I really try to follow the book.

And in the book it says, on the first first visit, leave this book with them and ask them to read it. So the first thing I'll ask you to do is read the big book. I won't say yes or no. I'll say, read the big book. They're like, I've read the big book.

What's this all about? Well, the book says to leave the book with them. I don't care if you've been around 10 years. I want you to read the big book and I'm gonna ask you to highlight certain things. And then when I ask you when you when the next time I see you after you've read this, when I ask you, are you willing to go to any lengths, I'm gonna make sure you know what any lengths looks like.

I mean, has has anybody ever come up to you and say, are you willing to go to any lengths? And you don't know really what that means? And then you say, yeah. Well well, maybe. I, you know, I want them to know what any lengths is is and I ask why are you willing to do what it says to do in this book to recover from alcoholism?

And if they say yes, you know, then I'll I'll I'll start I'll start working with them. Now every once in a while, I'll get somebody that's so sick they can't even read the book. And that's another thing. We're adaptable. I don't believe in the cookie cutter approach for for for sponsese.

You know, I I listen to my you know, it says that we'll intuitively know how to handle situations that used to baffle us. I intuitively know how to handle newcomers that baffle me. Okay? I just do. And, and I'll be helpful as long as there's a willingness and a participation in the recovery process.

I'll tell you this, when you're putting in more work than they are, it's not working. You should not be in that relationship when you're putting in more work than they are. When you walk away exhausted when you've been working with somebody, it's not working. You should walk away elated. You should walk away going, wow, that's really great.

When you walk away exhausted, it's usually because you're putting more you're you're feeding too much and there's nothing coming back. You know, so it does say in this book that if someone is not willing to work with you, that you should drop them for a while. Maybe they'll change their mind. And I do that a lot too. I don't fire anybody.

I don't I don't like shaming anybody or making you feel small. Alcohol does enough of that itself. But I'll just kinda disappear off to the side, and you'll kinda get the hint that I'm not I'm not willing to spend a lot of time with you. Because I need to spend the time with my time is is finite these days. I need to spend it with the the people that are are really, really willing.

Now I'm gonna I'm gonna leave you with this. I want you to consider something. Consider that a life with with, with unfinished amends in other words, the difference between a life with all of the amends that you're consciously aware of being taken care of and addressed versus the life where you still have unfinished amends that you know about is like the difference between night and day. Mhmm. It's like the difference between black and white.

And for some of us real alcoholics, it can be the difference between life life and death. So I want you to consider something. I'm not gonna make you raise your hand, but I'm I'm gonna ask you this question. Are there unfinished amends in your life? Are there things that are there amends that you know you should do that you just haven't done?

Then I want you to consider something. Is it possible that not making that amends can lead you back to a drink? I just want you to consider it. Don't give it a yes or no answer. Just ask if that's possible and consider that.

And I want you to consider this. At 8 o'clock, I'm gonna tell you my story. So consider Don't miss this. Basketball, hockey, soccer thing you got going on, whatever it is, you can tell I'm not very much into sports. If it's not wrestling, I'm not into it.

Would you rather come hear that crazy story that I got going on here, which is 8 hours, bottle to throttle. Kate, I'll wait till you hear this. It's great. Okay. So, tonight, we're gonna come back here at, at 8 o'clock.

It's it's gonna be a speaker meeting, a normal speaker meeting. We're very excited about to have you all here. There's a lot of people that are coming. I'm really excited about that. Tomorrow morning's meditation and then I'm gonna bring you through steps 10, 11, and 12.

That's the me. That is the continued that you all are gonna do. So, we're gonna email you these packages. I'd like you all to print them out tonight and bring them in. I'm gonna show you how to do daily inventory.

I'll even bring in mine, which I I it's gonna be blank because life is phenomenal. And, one more thing, my my wonderful wife, Marybeth, is the warm up speaker for Doug. And big Al Anon girl. So for the Al Anon girls that are here She's Al Anon. She's AA, she's lived with she's lived with me for 13 years.

Check that out. There's something to be said about that. And if you can do that successfully Forget about it. Thanks, guys. Let's give them a hand.