The Greeley Stampede in Greely, CO

my name's Frank I'm an alcoholic

please stay alive through credible they got to spot lights up here our

and I hate to be in a position where I can't see the wrong size

get out your grammar rigorous honesty and I know you're all saying trusted

where your friend

I know better

joy Johnny's page

Bridget it's more when I see with this but she was working with I think it's just a rumor

that's somebody hearing really called Abbas is water weight the money to fires fluids for other patients

I sobered up March twelfth nineteen sixty six

I haven't had a drink since that date

I have recovered from the disease of alcoholism recovered

you know that most people would say the recovering aren't

and I recovered by working on a regular basis the twelve steps of Alcoholics Anonymous

why would people say they're recovering the big Bucks talks about a hundred people who in a relatively short period of time we covered

well if I say I am recovering I have no responsibility for my life

if I lie to you

who can blame them thank

I'm just recovering let me tell you today if I lie to you it's because I'm a dishonest son of a ****

if I run roughshod over you is through your life it is because I had too much to drink

this program work

this program is about getting and obtaining a large

conscious contact with god

and it works and it always work

I believe there's one mistake in the big book it talks about people who are constitutionally incapable of being on

I do not believe that's true

that hasn't met in any of the years of my experience

if you're sick

you're willfully say

if you're slipping you're welcome leaflet

it is not all right for an alcoholic to drink

and the group in which I belong it is not acceptable behavior

every human being is acceptable

but some sort of a veteran are groups left we don't say keep coming back sweetheart

we say Saddam let's see what mistake you made what you didn't do

and it becomes very obvious very fast

it's not a mystery

most people who come into Alcoholics Anonymous do not get solved

most people who come into alcoholics do not stay so

we come to these conventions where these regionals and everybody's all dressed up with a deal that wonderful time that's as it should be

and it would be all right it's the same people would be in this room next year

but they won't be

I'll be the same number of people

and I'll be all basin Perfil

very

enjoying the fellowship

but it won't be the same people

they'll be a terrible deficiency here and you won't miss

you missed one

corrupt ranking they were here last year

I can only care about you if you care

it is a spiritual law

if you don't care I can't hear

I wish I could I have tried

the spiritual life of Alcoholics Anonymous sometime is a heartbreaking son of a ****

I want someone that you have been close to and who have love and who has grown up with you go out and drink and go out drinking back

this great community has had a large dose of this is the immediate past wonderful men and women

and such tragedies do not need to happen

I purchased through hard drive

bullshit it's a mother's gift compared to what would be that

you know when I came in

the twelve steps were pretty well hit

I sobered up in Denver sobered up York Street there's a lot of talk about worshipping doorknob

what have you

but the one advantage we have coming in during that period of time the people didn't die out of the treatment centers away from major died in front of us they died out of our groups

now the death is still going on

but we're aware that the former more more more narcotics anonymous

the awful truth is still going on the drink is too tough

if you're an alcoholic

when I came in March twelfth nineteen sixty six I assume that that that came in my sobriety date was given to

hello George Strait the viewers over from this paid off I don't know when I came in the York Street whether I will drive for smoked

however some guy in Texas give a bit because well he says if you can't remember your last thank you haven't had it yet

I don't remember the last month

let me one of those big book I get nervous with our manager but but

I don't think you're ever going to use

this is a book that is

often discussed the study but seldom read

they

when I came in

I was physically very ill

I couldn't remember my own phone number

however was shot

during the past

I am I've been puking and

testing blood and all the little nice staff

they drank a lot

yeah we I don't spend much time talking about drinking

what are the new liberal fought

about Alcoholics Anonymous is you don't need to drink to get it

thank you the

it does there's more bullshit if you can believe

and why why why should they let you know that

where valuable people

economically incredibly valuable to fake it in favor of raising a kid with a lot

there is an incredible massive industry that's built up around us now

thank

it's wonderful sources of income get out of these

friends of AA

well your run out of stock

we're not a rock star the material for that then that

get up you have a damn nasty way if that

so you've got to encourage more and more people into the alcoholism and what happens within a

it's not that they heard it they don't make them

that's what happens to the individual the non Alfie who has been hustled and

Dr Wallich the nine

they are quite detection with the disease of alcoholism

boil down your **** with the disease of alcoholism

all nervous orders melodies of any kind

Hey oriented three

they have

but what does that do to the four individual that is so awful

is that he moves into a spiritual

why

I'm alive the demands rigorous honesty

on the basis of a fundamental life

and he gets sicker and there's no exceptions to that

he doesn't pop rock pop

well it's not over based on the foundation of one drunk talking to another girl

my father when I came I was incredibly fortunate unbelievably fortune almost immediately I ran into a sponsor

by the way I ran into a man doesn't believe in five

any distinguish these things for

I was right democratically minded

you know liberal thinker

this issue came up

after a have been getting to work for me and I asked him about it he said let me tell you

it has a different

between an addict junkie and an alcoholic is the

if they give up here in the mountains you get a check

I did take a normal ma'am I did hit him with heroin

four five six times you got a letter

anyway or woman

but you take that same man up there on the mountain

thank you for what you've done

really like the box

they love all animals put intravenously board on a family right

the year two years five

he says when you get done all you don't want to do is get away from

so you take it out

thank

and if I college of equity addicts in the LC

this incredibly different

did you ever see an Alfie trying to hook another Alfie

that's life but after you get your

yeah

your hands off of that

well it's just semantics

this is a medical if you're a new outfield ain't get pinched by a junkie

the foundation of our program is identification with alcohol is

if you'd like medical authority for all of that was told to ask what does the forty some years of billing five got together

Hey

and there's ample evidence genetic evidence the United States department of health they can find themselves in a trial with an idea of the office with a twenty one

what tests that are normally given notices both weakening went through genetic

the study of the chromosome Taylor that's gonna be awfully

why is this public

those were valuable people to the industry

however talk about the big book

I work in the steps of Alcoholics Anonymous simply

right the first step

we admitted we were powerless over alcohol that our lives have become unmanageable this book

so the issue is control

if

when I'm sober I cannot stay away from the first rank or if when I start to drink I cannot

control the amount I take I'm probably alcoholic

well that's part of the first up was relatively easy for me

funny never again this is the end of

so help me god

and before dark on the bar

I drank a lot by the way I drank from eight to twenty hours a day every day

that's a lot I have a large and I have a lot but I did drink

great great

that's right

I didn't have two glasses of sherry I'm not

got a meeting last month as well

is that what it does does it ever have different parts I have never met enough you could drink two glasses with you

I have twelve step the guy

Charlie and I did he's here somewhere got no idea any life in here

that

Goodrick two glasses of sherry no more no less every night

I'm interested in L.

and we can do anything with it we left I got somebody else who is an alcoholic anonymous that

a drive

I don't know why

who in the hell would want to mess with these awful people

social occasion the family that what got Johnny Johnny Depp little brain damage at all you must have been dropped she didn't write about what

all charming LP's are Jesus Christ

awful bunch of people

portion of our budget here the right you know because they're going to do and I started talking

they're gonna ship go away evil one go away

and then when I finished in the elbows

charming but

we start a quarter after the hour

Raffel is the most corrupt thing I've ever seen and I've called

did you notice fifty dollars wider than just gave that charming the lab we make the rules up as we go yeah honey I'd like to see your inventory

that number now yeah my real out there a long time since I've had a great

now maybe when I came in

I was an erotic that happens at the right price then you could have diagnosed with anything

like a path the narrow system manic depressive depending on which second kickoff man

well that's all for all

I am emotionally stable by anybody's

I can be very difficult for patients

I have the respect to the fellow members of that profession and I am emotionally stable

now I can drink again

normal

but perhaps I was a situational drink

because at that time I was facing jail

disbarment as a minimum

money Jesus Christ I have a lot of I had a lot of enemies I was not a quiet drink

my amends or about a third of its I we don't ever want to see you you son of a **** again

well the one that would talk to me I was not a sweetheart

I remember one guy that fired me

I've only been within two months I came in my stuff a little problem with that

then I asked him I said the

okay why

bad mistake every drug knows better than that but I got

oh god he told me I don't you know you don't do what I want to never flying J. alive just two months I've only been there too much what a dump truck I went to Catholic

later when I make demands that looked at how did you pick it up the court because of my brother's a drunk

another interesting aspect to that some seven or eight years we have a system a rating of attorneys call Martin Dylan how

an attorney returning

and he sent me a letter that he is with the reading officer for this company to make the three

and that he had given me an AV rating which is the highest possible

and that I had earned it to the same guy that I really screwed up

I have a cat

our lives have become unmanageable

let me

Hey it's questions are questions that are to be answered

eight questions don't seek answers

that would be possible to have a big book study group right

you can't study the big book why

because the spiritual life is not a fair

you must live in

this is a book a swing for construction

take part a you put it on part B. and take X. Y. Z. or not but the other I think it done you get a place that I work

and that's all it is is that in the fall off of the

not a theology if not dogma did you do certain things it'll work

by the way you're feeling

we have an expression of our group I went to the pardon of all dirty

what you're feeling

why

one

because they don't tell you anything they like to

if the idiocy of if it feels good it's fun for you if it feels bad it's better for you

I damn near died on that one here's how

your feelings don't tell you anything

the end up

that's a pop up different things at different times Dr

I've been thrown feelings right

if not then and then provided hot what do you think about this how do you feel about

how do you feel about the election

well let me

really like getting that faster I think now it's low self esteem

my problem is low self esteem I was when I came in

you see I knew I was thought I could live up to their own selfish please

so I have low self esteem

I thought that I was a golden prince that is until about five to put it up for my birthday

my self esteem was low

because the world would not accept the golden prince

I live very manageable can I do what I intend to do

the definition a lot of support

I'll do what I say I will do and I will say what I will do

I will do what I say I will do it I will say what I will do what I can do that I'm a free man

I'll get your work done for you how do an honest day's work for you I love you I'll forsake all others

well

of course somebody's button there out there that I

my life is a manageable how is it my wife said no they're not

he by the way is going to going to join the chances

a good woman I was sickened to death I mean I made six of them or got careless with the way the more like

seven

have you done your meditation this one I don't mean a little bit but I'm not talking about the Sniffles I haven't but I have been submitted to the obscenities of the medical profession all in

all openings so forthright

I am

you know I'm probably a little bit bigger but

get your feet off the floor

how to get it boy

you've heard my image

how is it with money can I manage money this is what I intend to

what about the IRS

phone bill public service

HM wait

the product that

however briefly you don't answer this question look at July

although it's personal relations

the family house with my wife however this morning last night

this is what they

admission to be feel the tension has

this call confession to your inner most self

the product knowledge but it is not a generality is made in the first five to seven of the situation the reality here in

and it's only in that reality

but you will find that

am I afraid of misery and depression

can I control my emotional life

however this afternoon today so forth I thought of the raffle off two more Bucks I'd wet my pants

well

he said he

I came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity you better know what

I have defined it as true

anything that is other than through that reality is not

does not say

by the way the big book does not talk about that

then take effect

because you're a liar and a thief but I figure

the disease of alcoholism of appetite last silent but the rope with

what can you do about that

I fell upon me right I have no responsibility at the

if I'm alive

I got the responsibility transaction

I came to believe that a power greater than myself coverage for me two seventy

I'm a senior so

order that means come to true how do I work the steps that

never going back eighteen years working I work from here and now

do I believe I'm willing to believe that there is a power greater than myself for

good work on the first up like that will leave you

one second who is personal to me

I don't know if this is not necessarily Amanda believes there's no god

make this is one of the ways of there's no doubt that has any relevance to him

I brought this is far as god's going to take you know for

this is the end of it all went out the rest of my day is the best way I can

or perhaps

past here

there's a whole new level of consciousness a whole New World

a whole new dimension

all aspects of love and affection I can only dream about

all new aspects of pop that

work that helps a lot in Grandview

or perhaps this is all over it

who am I to say the footballer at

bookmark the phases of this

either got his arm or his nothing which is going to be

god help me god at all

hi you begin to assume responsibility for what happened to the rest your trip to the staff

I'm assuming that you have accepted you're going to work the staff on a regular basis year by year by year

twelve you were given a group you know the trip mines during the match with revenues so we very cheesy have a better life

the line

the best over six months would be to put that ball

well he's a beloved old clothes

there

more god damn drug you know used to run she

at a cheap rate for ten years before a war with the law

also by the way was my cure for alcohol

but anyway rounded shape we had thought we put two percent of the box and

what a number of years to be surprised

well amongst those

shrink it up box

they were able to perform AS

but they never threw anyone

what the hell is the son of a threat

worse than that they cut off little boys who we use to fight off the bug could have something going for

watch the fact we replace with an alcoholic

we're a little short

fortunately the Georgian style

but unfortunately

they take a lot of simple minds with

the awful fact about all the

very unsentimental thing I'm calling because what makes the content amount of alcohol if you're an alcoholic

later the safety of the turn our life and our will over to the care god as we understood that

but first requirement of the third

before you can do anything else

the big book says you must be convinced that any live based on self will

cannot be processed

any life based on self will cannot be a success

one of the leading by that you must understand this well you cannot understand them

it simply means that any life life based on my belief that

an update

yeah I know all about

I know how hard that is

what's right what's wrong what's up and what's down what's good what's bad

it was my righteousness by right fielder

I was a dirty being thought of as you drop back

that is what destroyed me it was my goodness the field

by knowing how the world should be

the world not matching

and the anger the frustration the viciousness came out of my frustration with the way the world not behaving as I knew it should

hello world not treating me as I know I should be treated and you're not playing your role with the work

read a newspaper and I would rate

right right down the street there raining on my parade

yeah I have a right to an open highway

and through respect

Eddie live based on self will come at six three

then the second aspect I cannot relieve myself

of my own self worth

preferable to level

I want

it gives a single statement

that is the greatest statement of hope that we have an alcoholic or non

it says our troubles are of our own making

they arise out of ourselves

that's the greatest statement hope we have

all of my troubled by stuff myself I get a cold

but the problem is

because of my own making arises out of myself why is that

the greatest big medical

because it also says that with

in the last analysis work out as we found

and I have the solution

and the root of my problem thanks for

you're free of my troubles are caused by you and by her and buy them and buy gifts and by bad luck and lack of education I always look for a place

Dr healthcare do I think about that

but it isn't true

all of my troubles are my own making what a wonderful thing

what a wonderful for

thank

am I ready to go out of control

am I ready to utterly abandon myself the guy

each time I faced with life each time I go for the for the

police

in a sense it was a lot easier when I came in

I don't have much hope that first third step with

god if there is a guy that has anything to do with the like the main

I had a real problem

I know what I've done with the son of a **** like me if I didn't go

there was a god

I would like my imagination of god I was a problem

so we're like this god if there is a god of one thirty lonely nine eleven it is the view of the life of me

all right

I was certain I was going to turn into some kind of a castrated farm singer

when

everything that I buy one

but from where I was the one that

I was moving up

whether much hope the math

but I've never done it any better

for more sophisticated and now know more about it have far more experience but I've never taken before sure the third step that I did that thirty five

that a third step for god I'm willing that you have all of the

there were three of the bill with me as I will

related via the father just stuff that I may better do that I will

take away my difficulties that victory over them can bear witness to those I would help provide powers I love my way of life

may I do that I will always

credible threat credible

and then from that decision in that part all my god in the program here's how you're right in the door

there put the pages name of the first pop

you put me in the first

you take his inventory in detail and the fact

indeed killed on the job

is that Britney well isn't right

on Tuesday she said I was a bomb

then in the third quarter in the prior year the map third call

threatens our affect myself the state right

hello works of reality virtual girlfriend here and every time I say something of no

but the bar what you're looking

later an hour off leave a valid

Lisa

we have alot

that's perfect number two

he does not accept what I thought

how does this work

in the book shows just like things in the third call the fact of the fact I think the first which is an ally it affects my self esteem

South Korea I believe I am

well in this case

I'm an alcoholic

I am very

everybody knows everybody

ordentlich

as exhilarating

eight men are placed right

personal relations

Marty man was the greatest mistake a ever made

thanks relation

a woman should yield and believe what a man's that

you ever notice level one place the LP's of another

personal relations

my body will not

Hey my pitch if you double a

pocketbook

doesn't affect my pocketbook

now that third phone is great

except for the last

it just simply isn't true

and making decisions based on that block

have failed

I left law that does not exist in pro

the flood crossover which are was crucified

and that's out of the driveway

all the skills you know pick up overnight you need help with help from somebody that's got it

right separately

everybody knows where simply lock

but the spiritual skills are passed on we share our spring open experience

and that is a constant struggle up front a lot this is precisely how you recover

and you gain these skills

but we're going to watch hundred just make it a perfect

with a closed mouth understanding friend

Amerigroup mostly we take our first steps with each other

I understand what the hell we're trying to do

and a friendship that gap

must be crossed with love the fact

this is not a mechanistic

I couple my power with your pop

but again we come to this mystical world were called admit

the confectioner most self and you move to that place within yourself that is closest to the well although you yourself cannot act directly on your wheels you must move to the states

before god the scanner will work with

Hey go through

all of this stuff

however a lighting a candle but this is absurd

yeah

a friend of mine David another David got watch amending the

their beloved by god but not by man okay

somebody at

the the noises I'm a close buddy of Frank but I'm not in my R.

and then your return home

after you

paired with another man the exact nature of your raw

when you step through

and relinquish your right to defend yourself

twenty point your phone's going very good stuff

are you face the truth about yourself

and god is true

in your current home

and if you're fifty seven of them proper you will have a an experience

I've got I guarantee if it is it does take a look at somebody's walking from you have locked yourself

it's about a spiritual experience and don't get wishy washy about

stock markets around god is far you experience it in the questionable thing it is like a little butterfly if you've got the bike I threw in it stopped them white ball and put your pharmacy now that's experiencing problems that's what the hell I'm talking about

and it's here it's available to everybody yes if you're missing that begin again because you're gonna have it and don't settle for a damn thing to play

the pier forty

and now you stand up I think one of the most difficult step

because you are really aware

the chain for much

I've been doing this for eighteen years

there is a damper seven here I am

yeah I'd like to come face god

wide row

clean hands

there's your

there's about

but each time after coming face got a got my **** jam on my face

and again I have to face the proposition that I am forgiven

and forgivable

I need debate

yeah I'd love

earn and deserve my position with the

what

then I wouldn't be beholden what I but the grace of the love of god a caliber North Carolina for

my faith that all the victims seven staff

right creator I'm willing that you have all of me the good and the bad

and I pray that you removed from me every single defect of character that stands in the way of my useful to steal my fellow

they grant me strength as I go out from here to do your bidding

that magnificent seven step correct

early on the work I'm doing I'm trying to learn about forgiveness

I live in a perfect world

and I've discovered within myself in the flat for I guess this tendency to hold people to judge

how do you do that

you overlook that effect

yeah I'm a racial slur

but look at that second policy if it's true

thank god he is a son of a ****

it really is

I bet

I forget the world again with that same state

Victorian when you order less taking forget

and then in your man

we were like for sure right

yeah the whole yeah

rubble is who's Holden who

and I found myself right fit in the budget by

and I don't know who's letting loose but it sure felt for

there except

L. L. approval with car

Daystar there fella in a in a bill Hector door I am very loose that son of a **** and then

I didn't get to leave it he's got my name from all over Texas and every place

yeah their bill and I when we were drinking

got a bar fight

but the Johnnies are

I commend David welcome today right

I prefer to seven years to keep saying when you go to make amends to

what the hell you're talking about

by the world

I think that the delegate or should have been put out there that

you feel view full grown enough for what a double bill with

until one day after that I'm part of a

right

is that right

but I was a little insensitive to harm wouldn't just

a little insensitive to the fact that I have on people

when I snap via

when I made a tape with yeah but that one sometime sure about

hedge my bet get some better comes along

I'll tell you what I failed or not failed all the remember that when we spoke with at the beginning

two years

I've done all the work for work to commence when I was eight years old

I have a very difficult time I work with on a

the fact that I did I committed to all do it I failed or not say what I'll do I had to rearrange my entire life

the first officer that found out of them crooked I what

I found out how much of my life is just about

about eleven per minute much difficulty

if you don't know what your right hand still

if you're right and you're left in a park you know you're going to have funny things happen

yeah

and then the paths that

you're beginning to work with a line of the will

through these little steps you will help develop a line of the will

you will have a lined up with the will of god

and with the temp stuff you may keep that one that's a common at one month

one responsibility the ability to respond whole new ideas and function

and when they crop up probably a minute the guy that you're wrong talk to somebody keeps elusive not a time for an hour

in the middle of street

you don't stop and analyze you get your **** out

good evening evening meditation your leverage that

then you begin to learn how to pray

with a downward facing east

comments this holy act right

they briefly with her walk through a glass out

that's where it begins

we're gonna set out again begin to pray for god by yourself with the

come back again again

I have talked to raising your prices

Hey go move into these various religions where they have the skill