3rd Buckeye Roundup in Cincinnati, OH

3rd Buckeye Roundup in Cincinnati, OH

▶️ Play 🗣️ Pat R. ⏱️ 1h 1m 📅 11 Nov 1994
the grace of god
twenty seven
this is my first time
in the beginning
the New York
in
yeah
I don't
for
and a lot of great people
and I have learned in my
so when you see a person who has
number and their willingness
right
I don't
more than
and
well it was really
my
so you really never know when you
going very well my mother wanted
before it was
in nineteen forty two
and then
the thirty nine year
more
they learned a lot
really
many other
and
it was
and you know
the only thing is
my father when he was on call and I would
during
well it was really
they were really nice people
everything I wanted
okay
or something like
I was never anything to you
I would look
you know
I would look
no he's getting ready
we learned that a couple weeks ago
working with one
thank you
I
yeah
early years
one
you know
and I was quite young
ready to drink
the representative
the problem with somebody else's
he was very very very well
yeah
regulation
great
I had
feeling of watching you
in what you want
all right really
the beginning
it was
I hope you get it when I use it
what
because
but in the
you never want anything
failing your
fifteen years all right taking up
from the people that I because I learn all
think about
you know
more than
when I was in I really don't
look back and remember the people
but I I really can't remember
I was in school
in
I
when I worked in the
I got
a little later in the morning
we got
he was
we had a great great great wonderful communication
I don't think
come across
because there's no central heating and I wouldn't want
and I was
it was one of the only
and that was another
and three children
and I'm only a little weakness
I was drinking only
one
which is not only
I mean
in the morning
a couple of
the lady
right
all the duties and responsibilities
right
the way I want to
because
when I walked
I was very
only like
so that was the way it was
it was really a lot of rain
a lot of great together
the place
hold
we really
are there any
because the nineteen
program
he was very
they were very
when we come to our
it was planted in the back of my mind that if you have a
I mean there was there was there was
I am in the middle of
in order
three
thank
my
or I would
six years
thank you
and remember everything the next day there was no controlling
only certain
every morning I needed your current
I would think of
and the only because there was nothing going on
the only thing that everyone else in my life
I didn't
exactly what I wanted to
I didn't
I didn't know how much money my husband
and
and that would be wonderful
because then I can help but I was coming
I didn't want predictable feeling
great
where I would end up
what I would feel
during rate
and we're now awaiting
I think we
maybe
like
you never
this is a
a look at
I remember working in the background
people in my life
thanks for
I would take
one day I was
in my family
in the morning
in the morning
right right and it was about
more
and I suddenly realized in the research
somebody every day
my mother
thank you for
we got
the card
during
even if it was in the middle of
I would not
thank you morning drink in the morning
I went to the refrigerator and I remember putting my hand on the door of the refrigerator
yeah
even a little bit
blackout
my husband and I have deliberately going to my brother's in the middle of the week
because he was on vacation and I agree
in the middle of the week
not
the way they
you need to do something about
I really don't
don't worry about it
I want
yeah
what
you can
the lady was sitting at the table second
really
and the reservation kind of
one
two days later
I don't know when it started
going
cars cars and we don't
take me everywhere everyone
okay
the lady across the road
looking for a couple weeks
another thing
Schering
that was like nothing had ever
working in the program
you know
because
everything is
during the program and everything
do something and they never
thank
when I didn't want to go to meetings and go
the program
I don't think that I think
every
in my
the reason I was feeling that I got
I went to the in that room
okay
this meeting
Leo
but
and everything was
when you're
and you want
you know you
I need
your
I am
his record
we always go to the doctor
the only
you know
you could
you know
the whole feeling like you know
even
the only thing here
here are you getting your problem
well you know
right
yes
what
but we got
what's the meaning of
thank
okay
we have
and I would probably
thank
we're going to learn
what I
the
the group
every year
because
and then you can I mean
and all of that
because many
and I mean everything else
what
you can look anywhere in the
I was talking about moving
we
in the morning at the corner
when I can't
currently in the northwest corner
the area
one
and you could never mind
you're right
there were no
right
no more
no more
the report card
it will be all
in nineteen seventy one
thank you very
when one
one three four
because
but you have to go away
you're
we need to
your life
currently
we were
the only one
well
earlier in recent
finally tonight
here's
right
every one of those things that I could be
when I was drinking
right
you can get
great great what happened
or not
are you talking the same language
they were working
they would talk about the news
these people in in
we're using
only
people that are you
and I would open the
twenty one
we would look at
the girl at the door open
I don't
you don't worry in the world
I do not
are you
how are you
I used to try to put the liability
everything in the program
anybody
I cried I guess I would only be able to do what these people are asking you to do things like
and I would try to write you need to know what the word I didn't know
I think that I don't like about myself along with
I really am morning
right in my
right right right okay
people can be with my husband
on the cover you
you
really great
my experience with
try to get into that
for
because I have a lot of
right
the only
don't think that
to make
everything was making her
in the wake
whether we're
and he is a director of operations
place one night with a bunch of people in the long
somebody playing to this day I never heard
it's a combination to start to start
this guy was a white guy and he was an alcoholic and he wanted me to school shopping
in the wake of plain
the only electric
shop
I thought to myself nobody on the
I didn't even order
I think you came into my mind
what
I want to start
she told me to make a point in my
go up to a meeting
can you tell them what happened in the
start to work the program the way the people of Sussex county wanted me to work
I know that I had to move
I think we all have a
at some point along the way where happens in treatment whether it happens the day we walk into the program
come face to face in the big
the only difference is the first
thanks for having me in the
I had developed
from coming to these rooms
one
for
the license we can at least to sweep the floor really
one
the floor in the room before we left we picked up the check
commitments
is
and those
in the
in the afternoon that
in Sussex county
because the foundation
I had
away here
there are times when my my thing with the blues I don't
I came back to this program and I started to understand what the key words
I would
I think people want to do god's will
I want to understand everything one
a meeting
I probably wouldn't even to any place
for me
so you know you're doing god's will when you have
where all of this
the meeting one night and I was facing
works on the
long
during this meeting with an open speakers meaning I was reading that
thanks for bringing by honesty
the only started a local
it was it was like a
I can understand
things about myself
somebody
right
right
when I started when I called
I started to get down to the core might be
forgive myself
for everyone else drinking because I don't do some
the way I was I should be living
one for the
I really want to live with my
twenty years dictated my one
my focus was on the phone
I didn't have anything else in my head I didn't learn anything from
in my room from my experience and I really know today the nation
is not integrated into knowledge until I have a feeling
in my life today everything that you see in my person whatever you're saying
it's a direct result of Alcoholics Anonymous
you were acting like the world one is
thank you for the work in this
this person and then
my greatest education's online
it's not out of a college degree
I have gotten my education you know
I have gone to school
since I'm an Alcoholics Anonymous I can graduate from high school I never graduated I never have seen your
I didn't have a big wedding
I'm married I'm riding on
in the fall
you know which symbol
three beautiful
so that was what it was
kids are great kids
great
so there was a reason to be together but we were not alone because I could not have done the things that I've done
in this program
there was no way
and I have to leave and that was very painful
you're not somebody for twenty one years and leave them and not
it was very painful but I was seven years old
and I have done a lot of things
I had gotten to the core of my being I have gone through the fourth
I was beginning to understand what it meant to turn my world my life over to the
our
I have gone into that marriage and I know they made amends to the best of my ability because they were not accepted but it really didn't matter
not not one of them not even the kids in those years except
they really couldn't they didn't understand what you know that and by the time I did that I knew it didn't matter it was important that I did
that was what was important but I was willing
we are willing to such an important part of our program
and anything
I really don't well I have to do is they will
such an important thing
so simple
I have a friend
we were really good people
I was on the ballot
in my life
thank you
the world
from somebody have a lot of attention to in the program
you want to put out of your life things that are that are you
instead of going to make you happy I want to
I mean I you know
this week you know
today is the product of what can you
I'm
a crazy I really I was
everything was
your issues today I absolutely hate that word
so many
the world
the only other issue about every
it was really so my negativity kicked in right away when I met him I was going to pop up this guy
right
different ideas
I had graduated from school from nursing school
you gave me
through the eleven staff
and putting some work into my meditation and prayer
I decided that I should investigate nursing school now I really like because all my life going to be a dancer so I couldn't understand why
there is telling me to go see somebody cut out
really not my
I think one of the things I forgot to tell you which is really important
but a lot of time trying to get the world
to get in touch with with how I could be in the world without
only
one of the ways I did was I started to do some real
meditation
I used to have to go off by myself
I don't mean physically by myself in a mostly by myself and get answers to some reading and I'm going through all the steps that are used to read
quiet because I couldn't stand alone employ a lot of stress
I just couldn't handle it I would get out there in the world
you know
so I would have to come back
and today they're probably put me on some
they really want to come in today I don't know if I would be you know I got sober and I'm
from the
okay
the people getting things together so I get really upset because I was really a mess when I started
when the rain started open up
I was in bad shape
so I would have to go by myself emotionally kind of eliminate everybody in
I have power unless you give me some
and I I believe
the words in the book
it says that we will be granted
a glimpse
the road because reality
and I have experience that might surprise
that is anytime
if I make myself quite enough
that's why I'm so definite about the program because I have
kind of one of his realities with
investigating the doors open right away
I'm a nursing school in the nurse's
from there things going on
I couldn't take the house anymore it was it was terrible
I had a lock on my phone number is seven years old
I have no access to it I mean this man
that was a great control of your life with money
probably a little bit you know
you should get out of there
along
but anyway
I got a job
I got some more money for school and I went back to school almost school
and I was in a room
come with me
sorry about that that's an interesting story
anymore if you just moved three weeks later was wanted to move into
maybe he'll be on this from your current inventory only only last night
the government money for school
France and I went to school
the great
and I got a professional certificate
what I needed another door opened the door open there and before you know what I
waited from nursing school
yes
graduated
because in a lot of
one of the biggest story in my life is working down
the pump and circumstance walking down the
well the Korean mile
at my current
I got a job
finally
there was
what is the name of the evidence yeah I know
for coercing husband and
we
our relationship because there are certain lines you don't cross
and
I got another degree
in my profession
we decided
what
and I want to thank your father married I mean I wonder what the second one at the high school friends you know I would like
you know
the thing I mean
what do you
you know if you could please put
I'm not going to go to school and
I'm living with my father
so I do think he said yes and I think
president
when the winning
yeah do you think maybe you could
we have a
we had a real
a lot of
the family
and it was like a border
it was incredible
another your
another thing that I didn't do
another thing I didn't like
so it won't go away
I probably have half of the things
these are one of the things
you can somebody like me who looks okay on the outside
kind of all of that stuff going on the world is important
right well that's
but there's nothing going on and he
no guilt for a living
no ability to reason or make decisions or even they come in and look for
you know I thought about getting married but it was just as important
Mike
it wasn't a marriage
but it was an emotional my ability to reach out by myself
I hope you
because with all of that giving away all of that and then some of the people I couldn't
about anybody but myself
my world is wrapped up in the
social media
I know that you're here today
they want some girls from all three of these
right
this is a miracle
it is not in their program
everything I need here to grow and change
in the morning you this is the growth
I made up my mind this morning when I got out
Hey
one thing
my heart's desire
my son
it gets in the way of my telling people what the programs
the name
so we're in a
again
speaking
in many many
anywhere else in
something
I don't understand the answer to a problem
somebody
and bring solutions
hello I'm
the simplicity of
because
right but each one of
or I couldn't be leading in
so we all have a different world
we all have a different perspective
my perspective from the time I was a little girl
I just had more respect
thank you
your call here trying to think I can add anything more
since
the last two years I have really been reading W. or something it was
all right
or
annals of our experience whatever it is
I have found something
something else that I would like to read
because of the
I really believe in unity service and recovery
I really do I feel that they
so the problem is an ongoing thing I go back when I when I'm afraid I
when I feel powerless the first
I have to realize how
in my life
with my sanity is more important
I don't think about picking up a three
you know
one
the most precious
and there is only one way that I can restore my
because when I say there's no
so I just want to read you something that I found
in a letter in nineteen fifty
all the happiness the goal and that was what I spend my life looking for something outside
I don't think that's going to happen this is the point
how do we meet the problems we face
learn from them and transmit what we are going to want to
they would receive
in my view we have this for all the peoples of the grade school of life
is intended that we try to grow and we try to help our fellow travelers to grow in the kind of long but makes no demand
we tried to move towards the image and likeness of god as we understand
we
spectacular well
and help others to learn
we thank god for