Clancy I. at Eureka, CA 1976

Clancy I. at Eureka, CA 1976

▶️ Play 🗣️ Clancy I. ⏱️ 1h 39m 📅 01 Jan 1970
In getting the spiritual side of the program
just now, and I don't know, I think you have a very spiritual group here. Anybody that reads chapter 5 and then has a raffle is very church like.
Uh,
certainly glad you didn't have that raffle before Chapter 5 or you couldn't have been part of the tape for the meeting.
The I also would like to comment on the confidence that the committee has in me. It always gives a speaker a wonderful feeling when they take the, when they pass the baskets before he talks, just in case they all get up in the middle of the house. Screw that son of a bitch. I'm cutting out. Yeah,
I hope you didn't get much.
I I'm glad to be here tonight. I want to
thank my host, Wally. We've been very gracious. He and Hal came out to the airport. Hal is part and part of his campaign to recognize a as when they get off the plane, when you don't know who they are.
And
I guess he recognized me because I was the only one who didn't look serene when I stumbled off the plane. That's him. That's him.
I
want to thank Wally and his wife for picking me up and taking me to their home and having a nice dinner and
I have AI have a bed to sleep in tonight with a canopy over it. I feel like Louis the 14th
and my own bathroom. And I thought, isn't this touching in my own bathroom? There can't be any cruelty in such people. But I just now I was coming to the meeting, I was going in there to rinse out a few things
and right on the counter, Nick in my bathroom is a hair dryer, which is a cruel joke. It's a cruel joke.
Just about 10 years late. With that, Wally. Want to thanks a lot. If you're really doing a nice job to fight a wig like that, I'd wear it too.
I saw drying in the bathroom. That's how I know,
next to my hair dryer.
But I'm glad to be here tonight, safe and sane and sober,
because I didn't used to be. And as I like to say, with the nature of the illness that I seem to have it, it's possible that someday in the future I will not be safe and sane and sober again.
Because there's an awful lot of guys on the street and women who used to be good, sober members of Alcoholics Anonymous
and who, for one purpose or one reason or one rationalization or another, little by little
discontinued their activities until one day they were struck drunk. And some of them are, Some of them were people who felt they were indispensable to their groups and to a A.
And it's kind of a sad thing, because it's sad to remember that if you or I get drunk next week,
be very short time before the chair is filled and relatively short time before we're forgotten. That's one of the reasons I keep coming back, just so the fools won't forget me.
I
I used to drink alcohol and I did not. I do not. I am not in that school of thought
that says alcohol was my enemy. I'll tell you what I think. To me, alcohol was the best friend I ever had.
It was the best friend I ever had. I notice in my lifetime that,
for instance, women came and went
and wives came and went and children and families and houses and jobs and States and cities,
but a drink was always the same. Whether it's in Vancouver or Miami or Maine or whoever it was, a drink stuck with me. And to me, I did not drink because I had a problem with alcohol and I did not drink because I felt I had a problem with alcohol. Just the opposite. I drank because alcohol did something for me that I needed to have done for me if I was going to go out in those streets
and compete with those people who had it all together.
I
I had my first drink when I was 15 years old.
I had it in the South Pacific
and I was sitting on top a load of torpedo warheads and I was the little skinny puke with pimples all over his face. And
I took that drink and I
it made me sick is actually what happened.
But how I happened to be there? I
I grew up in a little town called Eau Claire, WI.
None of you ever heard of that, I'm sure. But it's a little town up in northern Wisconsin. And it's the kind of town that like you see an old Andy Hardy movies. It's two-story houses and comfortable and two little rivers come together there and make another Little River which winds down to the Mississippi. And when we were kids, we had little rafts and we went out there and went on the river.
In the summertime, it's all green and the just tunnels of trees you get on the street, any St. they're just trees making a green tunnel.
In the autumn, all these leaves turn to Crimson and gold and it's beautiful and you get that smell of burning leaves in the air. There's no smell quite as poignant as the smell of burning leaves in the autumn in the north and the east. In the summertime, the snow falls and it looks just like a picture or a Christmas card, you know,
beautiful snow and little buildings and smoke coming up and little white Spires of the churches. In the springtime, the snow melts and the flowers come back. And I, I always equate spring with the first smell of lilacs and just know that this year I'm going to fall in love again. And I just hope it's with somebody I like. You know, when spring comes, you got to fall in love
and it's just a gentle town in a sweet town and people are nice. And I grew up there and I just couldn't wait to get out of that God damn town. I didn't.
I don't know what there was. I wanted to be out in the big world where those lights were going.
I wanted to be in Minneapolis or Chicago or New York or someplace. Well, I was. I was having a little difficult in high school too, actually.
And when I was 15, as early 1943, I
been reading and I, I didn't know much about the world. I thought I did. I was raised in a very, very strict religious ethic, the Norwegian Lutheran Church. And I'll tell you there's very few things more strict than the Norwegian Lutheran Church. I hear a lot of times people in a a talk about how the rigors of the Catholic Church drove them to drink.
Where the Catholic Church that did it in Eau Claire, WI. If you could not make it as a Norwegian Lutheran,
and if you were looking for an easier, softer way, you could always become a Catholic.
That's the way it is when you're paranoid. You just have to
No, but we're sure sober
anyway.
The time to test this really is before the meeting,
but I I don't find it necessary to judge.
I now do it by choice. The
But I was racing and somehow or other I wanted to be out in the world and what I knew about the world I knew from
all like movies I went to in the night late 1930s. I learned about life from going to the movies. Some of you, now you just turned it off again. Jack, you dummy,
I maybe some of you in my age bracket might remember those late movies.
By the early 1940s, I thought I knew all about life. By watching Warner Brothers movies. I had learned how to walk the last mile without flinching.
I had learned how to bang my cup down during a prison revolt.
I had learned how to duel Basil Rathbone on the steps of Nottingham Castle. I had learned how to die of cancer.
The only thing I haven't learned much was how to live in the world. But I thought I knew all about it. And in 1943 but I little I knew about the world again was from Life magazine. I knew there was a war on and looked romantic in Guadalcanal in North Africa and I wanted to get out there in the world and also have this terrible
lust for life. And so on the Easter vacation of 1943, I was a junior in high school and I was having some difficulty because of my attitudes and I didn't like this crappy town in this crappy restrictions.
And
so I told my mother I was going to go to Superior, WI and see my aunt. And instead I hitchhiked to San Francisco.
And I got to San Francisco and I found a guy who showed me how to get some pony ID that same day. And the next morning I joined the National Maritime Union. And that afternoon I shipped out on the Liberty ship called the S S Lewis Pasteur and a load of torpedo DO warheads going to the South Pacific.
And about six hours out of port I suddenly realized, oh Jesus, this isn't it either. This is not it.
And I told the captain that I had changed my mind
and I thought I'd like to go home and visit with my mother.
And he told me to dummy up.
And that day I was in a that night I was in a focal is a room on a ship where people sleep. And I was really kind of afraid and scared and I was way over my head. I thought I was too slick for Eau Claire, WI, but I wasn't slick enough for this, I'll tell you.
And I was in there with three of the worst types of people. When you're 15 and got pimples on your face, these are the worst type of people. They're called men
men and they're all talking about things and easy For me, they seem to just be like all grown-ups always seem to be. Remember this one guy reaching his sea bag and he took out a bottle of whiskey
and he offered it to one of his friends while I cowered my bunk? He said, you want a little snark? And I said, yeah,
you want a little snort? And I said yeah. So how about you, Junior? Do you think you're men enough for a little snort? And I looked up at him with my steely blue eyes.
And I thought to myself, You big fool,
I don't drink whiskey. Lutherans don't drink whiskey. You're obviously Catholics. Lutherans don't do anything like that. And if I did, I still wouldn't because my I promised both my mother and my grandmother that I would not ever drink whiskey. And besides that, bad guys drink whiskey. Good guys don't. That's another thing you get from the movies. In the 1930s.
Errol Flynn never drank whiskey. I thought
Basil Rathbone drinks whiskey.
Buck Jones never drank any whiskey. Rustlers named Slade drink whiskey.
And he shoved that bottle in my face and he said, you think you're mad enough? And I looked right up at him and I said God damn right.
I've always been a little weak under peer pressure, actually.
And I had my first drink of whiskey on that ship and it went, it burned my mouth and it burned my throat and it burned my stomach.
And then it turned around and burned my stomach and burned my throat and burned my mouth and my ears and,
and are just dreadful. And I just thought to myself, God,
and what I remember most about I could still almost hear it sometimes, is the sneering, scornful laughter that I recall of those guys going
too much for your punk.
And there wasn't anything. I wasn't big enough to do anything about it. I thought later what I might have done is get one to lean over and say, hey, lean over it. You say, yeah,
take that, you know, But that is not really a stopper.
I'm glad I didn't think of it,
but all the way across the central Pacific on that ship, I snuck into that guy's sea bag every day that tried to hold a drink down. I hated it. It stunk. It was rotten. But as in nearly every part of my life,
when I come up against the conflict,
there is going to be something or somebody or some action that's going to, when that occurs, everything is going to be all right at that moment. You know, you go get older in life. It's if I can have that woman or that car or that job. But then for me, it was if I can just hold a drink down, they'll think I'm a man. And I practiced on that and threw up and practiced the trip in a day out of Pearl Harbor.
I took this drink and went, yeah, burned my throat and burned my stomach and stayed down
and it just tasted terrible. And I thought, God, if I could only pick one of those drinks now or not make a face, they'll think I'm a man.
I said they'll like me. And I kept sitting there thinking that maybe they'll like me. And as that whiskey stayed in me and I was thinking what what they thought the 1st of a maybe 5000 miracles that alcohol did for me begin that moment. My stomach got warm. My fingers tingled.
I gained about 6 inches in height.
My pimples fell off.
I felt like a Viking
and I thought, who gives a God damn what they think?
And then I got sick and threw up and it all went away. Yeah,
but for a moment in time and space, it seemed to me that I felt the way other people looked.
And I, I drank from MENA and I didn't drink very much. And I for a while I drank a little. I, I got sick a lot, but I tried to learn to drink things that didn't make me sick. And I developed some degrees of tolerance over the years.
But I'll tell you that feeling drinking gave me, I always felt was enabled me to do whatever I could do in my life,
because without it, I didn't seem to be much. And later in the war, I went in the Navy
and I took some examinations from the Armed Forces Institute, the correspondence course, remember having a few drinks before I took the test. And that gave me that feeling of kind of omnipotence. And I answered them all. I did beautifully. So I didn't have to go back and be a junior in high school. I could go to college after the war. And I went to college. I got married in college. I had a couple kids. I found that I had some talented. No, I hadn't. I had excellent coaching over a period of time and I became
National Intercollegiate Championship team
without editor of the yearbook.
And I went out in the world and I became a sports writer on a newspaper. And then I got an advertising work and I became as successful as I wanted to be
and I had more kids and got nice homes and
I drank all this time. And as far as I was concerned, drinking is what made it possible.
Now, don't misunderstand me.
I had problems
and I had some severe problems, I felt, but they were not problems that I could really
identify other people as having, at least not to the degree I had.
I suppose in the early 1950s and thereafter, if I would have had a
a lie detector test and somebody said to me what are your problems? And I gave them what I consider to be my problems, the needle wouldn't move them an inch. If I would have said something like,
my problem seems to be that somehow or other I seem to be more sensitive
to things than other people seem to be.
Another problem that I have is
I seem to be too easily rejected. I can sense rejection when other people can't, and I feel rejected.
In fact, that's one of the great things drinking did for me. When I'm sober, I am so easily rejected. But when I got just the right amount of alcohol in me and I grew up, for instance, to a woman and say, hey, you want to go out and she says no, I feel sorry for her.
Too bad baby, you missed it. Yes,
but when I'm sober, I want to hang myself.
There's the difference.
I seem to,
I seem to sometimes, you know, there's a feeling there's a thing in athletics where they talk about when you're under pressure and you kind of come apart under pressure, that's called choking. Like the last of the ninth and two walking up to bed and you choke and they call 3 strikes on you. You know, they talk about the hand coming out of the shirt.
And I had a little, I had a lot of choke in me when I was sober. When the pressure was on, I choke a little bit. But when I had a few drinks, it eased the choke.
I Another problem that I always seem to have is I didn't quite seem to fit into groups the way other people did. I I was there with them, but I never seemed to be able to sustain that feeling of fitting in.
And when I drank, I fit in
and that's why I drank. I didn't drink because I had a drinking problem. I drank because I had emotional upsets and they bothered me a lot. And in order to live in a competitive world and be a success, you got to have self-confidence. And if you haven't got it, take a few drinks and by God you'll have it.
And some you know there
some bad things happen along the way. Because when you're sensitive
and
easily rejected
and intelligent,
sometimes
the pressures get too much for you and sometimes you misjudge and drink too much.
And sometimes I got drunk,
and sometimes I had to get drunk to unwind.
And sometimes I want to have some fun and sometimes I got to
mixed up with bad crowds
and sometimes I just had pressures on
and sometimes I drank too much. And over a period of time, a lot of people were saying things like, you seem to have a drinking problem.
And I thought about it and I examined it and I stopped drinking, but I didn't have a drinking problem. It became, I became rather aware of that my problem is that I'm sensitive. And that's something you can't really talk about. You can talk about it, but people laugh when people say, hey, what's wrong with you? You can say I'm too sensitive. You're crazy is what you are.
I used to used to laugh and think, what if you gave answers to people
just the way you felt here?
How you doing, kid? Oh, I have a secret sense of inadequacy.
How you doing? Oh, I'm afraid.
What are you afraid of? Beat the shit out of me. Just afraid. I don't know
you discover quick these are not the right answers.
When they say how you doing, you say fine.
And I because of my sensitivity and my emotion that I tried to keep level I, I went to analysis for a while. I was making pretty good money. I got into analysis
and I discovered a great many things that made me that way.
He told me things that I I barely remember telling him.
And there's only one thing really. I'm not putting down analysis. It's a very good thing for many people. But as I look back, I spent some several thousands of dollars
and a lot of time with an analyst. As far as I can recall, the major thrust of what we wound up with is that life has its ups and life has its downs. Yeah. Wow, That was good to know
and I knew a number of the reasons why I was the way I was. According to him, there's only one thing wrong about that in gaining self knowledge of what makes you this way. It doesn't change anything, it just helps you describe it better.
It keeps on going, except now when people say what the hell is wrong with you, you can tell them
it's like being on the it's like being on the deck of the Titanic and you hit your iceberg and everybody else jumps into a boat and you go around looking to see exactly what happened.
And by the time you find out you're going down. You know, it does seem to make you whole lot of differences matter how much you know. It doesn't help,
and this discouraged me because I figured this analyst could do it. And then I got into some I start getting a little Moody once in a while because of the injustices I found in the world. That's one of the marks of the young dynamic man.
You cry out to the world. Justice.
Give me justice,
Justice for all mankind, but especially me.
As you get older and wiser, you begin to realize that's the last God damn thing you want. You know? The cry becomes mercy. Mercy for God's sakes. Maybe I have a relative working there, you know,
But when you're young and you think justice is going to make it
and there's a lot of injustice in the world, that can't be changed. It can't be changed when you want it to change.
And I got Moody sometimes, and sometimes I got Moody. And when my moodiness and my upsets and drinking too much all came together at once, strange things happen from time to time. Not the fall of the drinking fall of being surrounded by idiots.
Like, for instance, in the summer of 1954, I was working in a big advertising agency in the Midwest, and I had just won an award from the Junior Chamber of Commerce as being one of their Men of the Year.
And I had won a plaque for my writing.
And I had a home and a couple kids. And this was in July of 1954. Unfortunately, one of my moods was just overtaken me, plus one of my drinking bouts, plus one of my sensitivities,
and by December of 1954 I was playing piano in a whore house in San Francisco. Well
I'm not putting this down
but I'll tell you this, it's hard to work into your resume later.
That's why a lot of people like me have big areas in their resume that say self-employed
consultant.
Well, I wasn't there too long, couple months and I I wanted to do better. That was the other thing I was going to mention. That's always been one of the great problems in my life.
I was raised to be a good guy and that's all I've ever really wanted to be. If I could ever be anything, I'd be a straight arrow. Just Sam, straight arrow boy. Good guy, nice guy, easy going, dynamic, but primarily good
because good is good. And in my life I've noticed, and it always was. It's been a terrible thing for me, especially in those years. The longer I see when I stay good, the longer I stay good. There's a growing need to be bad
and you work on it and the more you stay the better you get the worse you want to be
till one day.
Now that isn't so bad either because I've been some pretty bad my day and I don't mind being bad. I wasn't trained for it by adjusted. Well,
now I don't mind being bad, but the damnedest thing is the longer I'm bad, there's a growing part of me that wants to be good.
So you and you're good, you want to be bad. And when you're bad, you want to be good. And there's nothing, there's no word. There's no place to rest. There's a, you know, I, I think of this, no one puts it any better that I know of than Chuck C from Laguna B, who talks about the prodigal son, how it applies to AAS and Alcoholics, about this man living with the husks and the swine and he's broken. And his father, the Lord says, come home and be the son of the Lord. And the man is sore afraid.
But they bathed him, and anointest him with oil,
and clothe him in shining arraignment. We Lutherans know those phrases.
And he came home and they killed the fatted calf, and he was still afraid, but by the time he got done eating, his brothers were there and everybody was happy ever after. Now I know that happens because that's happened to me several times.
And the curse of my life is not that. The curse of my life is when we get done with a fatted calf,
I hear them hog saying we got a new ship and husks in, come on over,
it's just back in.
So I wanted to get out of San Francisco and I'd stuck my wife and I guess then my wife and kids were up on a farm up in her parents farm in Wisconsin. And I,
I ran across a guide in the Navy with and he's going to go to El Paso.
And I have never been to El Paso. And I thought it would be a good time to get a start in. So he and I hitchhiked El Paso
and a few days after I was there I got a job in the El Paso Times as reporter and Sharkey. Thereafter I got a job in a local advertising agency and I got my family and brought him to town. And that was I got there in January of 1954. By May of 1956, a year and a half later, I just hitchhiked into my shirt sleeves. I was working day times and advertising agency at the night. I was on the faculty of the University of Texas at El Paso, and I was writing a weekly column for the El Paso
Times. Now, that isn't bad for a guy hitchhiking into town.
Unfortunately, however,
about this time one of my moods seemed to take me
and I had some bad breaks
and there's a great deal of pressure.
And the next month I happen to be put into the Texas Insane Asylum at Big Spring, TX.
That's another resume Buster, baby. I'll tell you.
And I, I was put in there, I'm happy to say, not as an alcoholic, because I never was an alcoholic. I was put in there as a suicidal schizoid depressive
because I tried to commit suicide. Well, when you're sensitive, you do these things
and I, I really was feeling kind of punk, except after I got there I was feeling kind of punk and I said you better not try to escape because this is an escape proof institution. And that's all I need to hear. I had a challenge at last and it took me two weeks to get out of that nut house, to find a way to get through a door, down a corridor, through another door, across the yard
and over the fence. And the fox was loose.
And
the trouble is you don't, you don't realize to go over that last fence that what they say is true. It's an escape proof institution. But you don't know until you get out. I don't know if you've ever been to West, TX, but you suddenly realize they can see you're running for three days in any direction
and you feel like such a dummy in your white bathrobe. Just
it's just a matter of time to lose. Field glasses pick you up
while there goes that little Yankee son of a bitch now.
And they snatched me back and they gave me 3 months of electric shock treatments for that
and I never tried to run anymore.
Fact after three months of electric shock you just has 48 electric shock speed. The bridge is the maximum you get in the state of Texas. Took me 3 weeks to get my name you know,
and by Christmas I'd come to some degree of. I think about that recently.
You know, they had seen on my record in May of 1956, I'd been on the faculty at the University of Texas to El Paso at night doing the dramatic direction and staging for the grand opera Mephistopoli.
That was my job.
And so the following Christmas they allowed, as part of my therapy, they allowed me to direct the Christmas pageant in that house.
I was a little groggy from everything, but
it was about a second grade level, so the entire student body could get each nuance of the performance.
The director's main job, as I recall, was trying to keep the three wise men off the Virgin Mary. Who got the curtain open? You know,
I just want a worshipper
get back. Lamar, Jean and I,
I started the hospital newspaper in the spring and I had a hell of a time getting out of there because I, I was in there. I was supposed to stay in there till I got well
and man, I if I hadn't found a way around that, I might have had to call in my talk tonight
because there was number getting well. And I I finally beat my way out of there because they started an alcoholic ward and I laid some story that I was thought I was an alcoholic and I had been going to a a I had been going to a, a meetings off and on for six years. By that time, six or seven years, because when people thought I had a drinking problem, I went to a a meeting because there's no sense trying to explain to him I don't have a drinking problem because all they can see and smell is what's on the outside. They can't see the inside so they think it's a drinking problem.
So I wasn't getting all the a, a crap I'd ever heard. And I finally got that nun house
and I was ready to reform again. Boy, I'll tell you. And some people thought I'd reformed and really changed my act and I thought I had. And a few months later, I was in Dallas working for Tracy Locke, the largest advertising agency in the southern United States, writing ads that you have to be old to remember them. Young people won't remember them, but they were famous in their day. All these cows talking to one another about the board and products. There was Elsie and Elmer and the Twins and Beaure.
Hideous goddamn group. And I had a home in Highland Park, which is the nice suburb north of Dallas. And I drove every morning. And my Buick convertible that I just bought on time down to this down Turtle Creek Park into Dallas. And I won an award after I'd been there just three months
and everything was fine. Had our fourth child born, another daughter born,
had four little girls and
I really had it going. Unfortunately, however,
one of my moods combined with one of my drinking bouts
and shortly thereafter I woke up one morning and I wasn't in Dallas. I was in the Phoenix Drunk tank,
and the guy had just taken his boots and kicked my front teeth on my truck.
And fortunately for me, I'd been in psychoanalysis some years before and I was able to identify his problem.
Yeah, I thought I was going to say, but I forgot. You're overreacting.
And as I laid there, I happened to think that the reason I was there is because my wife. I got fired off my job. I got fired off my job for
drunken moodiness and abuse of my employer and my wife finally got discouraged after all these years and took four kids and moved to a post office box. I don't know how they got in there, but that's what their address was. Of course, most of the kids were small, like, you know,
and
somewhere between Dallas and Phoenix, I'd lost my clothes
and I had to stay out of Texas. I couldn't go back and look because I was out on the nut house on probation to my wife
and I knew she must have blown the whistle on me because she always was vicious
and I really just didn't feel good.
Is about August in
August in Phoenix, is not comfortable. Is about 115 on the street and there's 135 on the third story, the jail there.
And I didn't know I was going to get out of jail. I only knew one guy in Phoenix, the vice president in charge of public relations for the Valley National Banks of Arizona, because he and I had spoken together in a a convention on concepts of advertising. And I just didn't feel like calling him, really.
They had no front teeth and I had a T-shirt with vomit on it and some pants
and some tennis. I don't know where the hell I got them.
So they kicked me out the next morning
and I, I didn't know what to do. I, I knew if I stood in the street corner I'd get bagged with you being arrested for vagrancy. I'd been in jail
32 times by then, and I knew how to go to jail. I mean mostly for bizarre sensitivity.
So I took AI, looked up AA in the phone book, and there was a place called the Arid Club on N 3rd St. and I sashayed over there, tried to look like an eccentric millionaire.
And I went in there and sat around and thought I could hustle some money off these boob Alcoholics. And I hit some old lady for a few bucks
and if you're going to help the nice young man. And
I got her for what she had in her purse. She was so easy. I almost sent her home for more. I almost did. But I I thought she'll talk to somebody will be my butt. So I, I got out of there. My next move now is going to go to Seattle. I've never been in Seattle. I was going to reform, start over, get back to the Lutheran Church, shape up, send money to my children
if I could get it to them somehow that my wife seeing it
take right to my father and mother. Wisconsin someday, come back to Eau Claire, WI to success. If I could just get to Seattle
and I got as far as Los Angeles and I got screwed, I couldn't get out of that stinking town as the first time I've ever been in that you can't walk to the city limits. You got to get a score to get to the city limits.
And I went out to the AA club, said something called the 6300 club,
even though I wasn't an alcoholic
because
looking the way I did, I couldn't go to the Junior Chamber of Commerce and say I used to be man of the year. You know, you can't really go to the Masonic Temple and say here I am baby, you can always go to an A A club because them boobs think your problem is drinking. And I can talk about drinking, but what they didn't have never understood is my problem was much deeper than drinking.
And I hung around the A club for a while. I was really quite desperate. I got banned out of the a A club sober
for stealing the coffee Kitty money.
Well, when you're sensitive, you've got to live.
And I, I went down the beach and hung around there and I went back down town and I wound up remember going on Skid Row and thinking someday I must write a book about this. This is an interesting thing. And one day I really, I'm not going to write a book. I'm living in an all night theater. I'm peddling handbills. I'm selling blood for $4.00 a pint on E 4th Street. I'm stealing. I'm banned from the A a club even if I was an alcoholic, which I'm not,
and all I have ever wanted to be was a good guy
and I don't even know what the Hell's wrong with me.
Maybe that curse of that Lutheran God has gotten me. Maybe that's exactly what happened. Remember 1 morning I learned to sell a pint of blood for $4.00 and they took that drop out of my ear and they decided the iron content and my blood was no longer high enough for Skid Row blood selling.
And it suddenly struck me. I'm dying and there's not a damn thing I can do about it. If I had only got to Seattle
and that morning I figured I knew I had to get off the street so I better go out to the I went to the a a club again, even though I was banned. That's called the 6300 club because there's 6300 W and I started 500 E and I walked 68 blocks. Sick and desperate and
just crazy.
Wanted in one state to go to the nut house. 32 arrests, voluntary commitment, the VA after the war for my sensitivities and nervousness, just knowing there's no help for me.
And I got up at a a club and the guy says you can't come in, your name's on the list. And I says, for Christ's sake, I'm going to die on the street.
And he says I can't help, but you can't come in. I said I guess I had a slip
and he said you can't come in and I just stood there, you got to let me hear but cried. That weighed 108 lbs less than I weighed and I went away to see no teeth.
Dying, Dying and punishes, you know, he says. You are the phoniest little son of a bitch I've ever seen.
He's But I don't want you hanging around our door. Go in the backroom and shut the door and don't let anybody know I let you in.
So I went back there and threw up on their sofa and thought,
if I can just get to Seattle,
I'll get us some one of these dumb sponsors and I'll take his money. Or if necessary I'll hit somebody over the head or I'll stay. I'll hide myself in this club and knock over there till at night. I don't want to be like this. I want to be a good man. But I got I'm going to die. And I lay on that sofa and that vomit
and I, I have no intuition or no insight or no idea, not the slightest idea that that would be my sobriety date.
But it was much to my surprise, and now it's been something over 17 years since that morning
I had my 10th birthday. When you had your entrance to a A in October of 1958, that was
and I here I am now. Tonight I've come here kind of an old timer
come here. Tremendous expense and no little inconvenience
to talk to you. Newer people
can ask you this question.
Why can't you accept this program sincerely the way we did in the old days?
That's a long time to go without a drink. 17 years and some
and I haven't had any medications, any pills for my emotions,
some areas that just seems terrible.
I haven't little groups of a round a A. From time to time
three or four boobs get together. They say hey baby
Book doesn't mention pot.
Haven't had any of that. I by the time I think about it, those guys are gone.
But the answer to that book doesn't mention pie. I guess you could say no the book, but the book mentions jerks like you. Why don't you screw off?
I haven't had anything stronger in my body than an aspirin, except once briefly other medical thing on my teeth
since 1958.
And the best psychiatrist I ever had told me that sooner or later I must always have some degree of tranquilizing or sedating
drugs because of the intensities of my emotions. He told me that in the early 1950s,
and I haven't had anything any of it for 17 years.
And what's even more amazing, I have had no therapy except that which is found in Alcoholics Anonymous since October of 1958. I haven't even been privileged. I got an A A too early before I realized it needed special help to stay sober
and I makes a nice story and you can see now I don't weigh 108 lbs.
I have a wonderful smile. Should be It cost me a lot.
I I'm well dressed, I got a couple bucks in my pocket and I could spend the rest of the meeting telling you how wonderful it's all been.
But, you know, that's one of the sad things sometimes about a A
is that we talk about how bad it was
and then we talk about how good it is.
And sometimes we forget to give one another the benefit of our experience, of how you get from one to the other.
It's easier that it was terrible. Now it's wonderful what happened. Don't analyze. Utilize. Yeah.
And I think I'd like to take a few minutes tonight.
I might stay here a long time. It's cold outside. I'm not used to it,
but I take a few minutes, if I may, to tell you a little bit of what happened to me or what what changed my life. Let me say this, the most important thing that I told you tonight. I said when I first got up here and we take it for granted, but this was the most difficult thing for me to accept in my life. When I said my name is Clancy Emmisland and
I am an alcoholic because I would have bet my life and did
that I was not really an alcoholic or if I was some kind of an alcoholic, I was a special
alcoholic with different emotional problems. As this book mentions,
I what I was new in the 1950s, they used to say a lot of things like,
well, no matter how things look to you, if you keep bona meetings and stay sober, how these things look to you will change. And I really,
you can't change facts. These things are, you can't change them. These memories, these sadnesses, these emotions.
And I'll tell you over the years, it's true. Nothing really changed in the past. The same emotions that used to kill me when I look at them differently are a long way from killing me. The same things that what might have been that used to kill me don't kill me. The same if onlys that used to eat me up don't eat me up. Just about everything in my life that I look at looks different to me. The same facts look different to me. It's a change of perspective.
A A does not change facts. It turns out it changed your perspective, so you see them realistically
or seem as they are.
There's only one thing that I had trouble with. I couldn't see how I was going to change the one great problem, because in my heart of hearts, I really knew as well as I knew anything. But my problem really isn't alcohol at the bottom.
Alcoholics are people whose problem is alcohol. I have other things that these people can't even understand,
and
oddly enough, over the years that is the only feeling I have never have to change.
In fact, tonight I am more convinced that I was in 1958, that my problem is not and never has been alcohol. What do you think of that?
Now that sounds a little heretical, doesn't it? But I'll take it a step further.
We all, we are entitled to speak our own opinions here. And since I'm speaking, I'll give you my opinion. You can leave your opinion in the Hollow tree. I'll read it tomorrow morning.
In my opinion, if your problem is alcohol, you're in the wrong place and you shouldn't be here now. How does that grab you?
Sounds dreadful lesson, but I want you to. I'll explain that to you for a minute because my life was changed when I begin to understand that
you'd be in the If your problem is alcohol, you're in the wrong place for two reasons. 1A A has no treatment for people with the drinking problem.
Two, if you have a problem with alcohol, you don't need treatment.
Now that really sounds getting weird, but I'll tell you something.
If your problem is alcohol,
and if most if your life is pretty alright except when you drink, and then drinking causes you a great deal of problems,
I'm going to give you an answer to that problem so you never have to go to another meeting. As long as you live,
don't drink.
That's all there is to it baby. If you got a problem, if your life is OK except for alcohol,
don't drink alcohol. You know, if you loved orange juice and drank 2 glasses every morning and finally over a period of years it became toxic to your sister in terms of a glass of orange juice, your nose fell off and you went to a doctor and say, hey, my nose falls off. He says it's your orange juice. Can't be. I've been drinking every day for 30 years, can't help but you can't drink it anymore. You might drink one more glass just to make sure,
but you wouldn't drink any more orange juice.
You don't have to get a sponsor.
You don't have to call up people in the middle of the night and say, could I just lick a skin?
You just don't break it.
If your problem is alcohol, baby, don't drink it.
Maybe you think your problem is, well, real Alcoholics don't get sober. If I could just get sober for a while, I'd be all right. I'll tell you a funny thing. A lot of people think Alcoholics are people who drink all the time and stay drunk all the time. I used to think that even after I was sober, by the time I was sober about five years, I was director of publications for a large medical corporation in Los Angeles. And I wasn't. We were doing some work on cancer
but I stumbled on something else in a different area
talking about alcohol and I didn't know this physical fact but I'll guarantee it's true.
No human body can stay intoxicated 14 straight days and nights.
You can't stay drunk. That's the worst part about being a drinker. You can't stay drunk. If you could stay drunk, we'd have a much smaller membership on a A. It seems to me you'd have a different speaker tonight. I might still be dancing on the bar in Juarez singing Yo Soy El Maestro de Los Locoste.
It's just that God damn sobering up in the Juarez jail all the time that you're dressed
but you can't stay drunk. It isn't that you don't want to stay drunk, but you can't.
Your body won't let you. Now Isn't that ridiculous? They tell you your body wants more alcohol, and it does until it gets to a danger point and then it won't let you drink anymore. Your body will set up to protect itself. Your body will set up actions to prevent you from drinking,
as we in medicine say.
When the body is sufficiently toxified through the induction of a substance such as alcohol,
we'll set up a series of involuntary physiological condition reflexes to reduce toxicity by inducing a procedure called reverse peristalsis.
Or in our circle, we call that puking.
I bet there aren't very many people here who haven't knelt in front of the old porcelain altar in the morning,
gazed into those shimmering waters,
said your morning prayer. Oh God,
you hardly ever stop and think your body's really helping you
stop reducing toxicity.
Some mornings when you're really sick, your body will do something even more impressive. It will remove alcohol from both ends at once.
Now that's very good for your body, but it's terrible on your nerves actually,
because not only are you terribly sick, but you're called upon to make a series of split second decisions,
and every answer must be correct.
And if you guess wrong just once,
now you have another problem
by the time you get that sick. Usually if you have any loved ones left or outside of the bathroom door encouraging you,
saying things like good enough fire you son of a bitch.
But all the patient can do say if I lived through this, you won't.
But your body has techniques. It makes you pass out. The pass out is so you cannot add any more alcohol to your system. You sweat it out,
the body will always get the alcohol level in your blood below intoxication. It'll do it every time you drink.
And sometimes people think the point of A is to get sober. There isn't a person in this room who hasn't been sober again and again and again and again. And if we all would get drunk after this meeting tonight, those of us that survived this drunk would get sober. You never have to go to another A A meeting, never have to hear the letters A A. You'll get sober again
and again and again and again.
And yet there still are people in a A who try to tell newcomers we are here to get sober.
If your problem is drinking,
you don't need help. Just don't drink,
you won't have any more problems. I just can't understand these speakers. I hear sometimes you say it's just wonderful. All the time in my life, except when I drank. Then I just went crazy.
But when I'm sober, everything is wonderful. And he keeps saying, well what the hell you drink for, you dummy? Christ, if I had a wonderful, I wouldn't drink. I'm sensitive. I'd love it
the you got to be careful.
But there is something wrong with us
and a lot of people die every year that have been to AA because they keep thinking it's alcohol. And occasionally in a a some old curmudgeon will tell them it is alcohol,
but I'll tell you it isn't. It's something that sounds like alcohol and people get mistaken for alcohol, but it isn't alcohol. It's something called alcoholism,
and the difference between alcohol and alcoholism is just the difference between living and dying,
comfort and agony.
It's just the difference because it boils down to this. And you, I hope if you're new, you might contemplate this and remember this
when, if your problem is alcohol, when you get sober, you recover. You are as recovered as you will ever be for the ever
in the disease of alcoholism, which is partially an alcohol problem.
When you get sober,
you look to everyone and to yourself as though you've recovered, but you haven't recovered because an alcoholism, the other side of it is what kills Alcoholics. It's because then you go underneath, you go underground, you get into areas of emotions
that sooner or later in the alcoholic
force him
to have to drink again next time. Sooner or later
that the difference between being sober and recovering and being sober. Getting into emotions that make you drink, that make you drink when it gets over. That's called alcoholism. That is what alcoholism is. And most people who die from alcoholism die waving 1 flag. But damn it, I'm not an alcoholic. I've been sober a lot
or I'm not an alcoholic. I haven't been on Skid Row.
Hard to remember. 97% of people who die from alcoholism never been on Skid Row.
About 50% of people who die from alcoholism have never been in jail.
Because what they got doesn't look like what they think it is.
And it'd be kind of funny if it weren't so lethal.
And that's kind of what you got to remember. Now the question is, well, if you just straighten out these emotions,
you should be all right. Maybe you, you know, And that's why most people like us, have a long history of looking for answers,
whether it's TA or TM or Esther,
metaphysics or whatever it might be,
anything. Just give me some peace for Christ's sake, and I'll be all right.
Now let me just take a minute to explain these funny alcoholic emotions.
It you still got to start with this premise.
If alcohol doesn't do something for you, it will never do anything to you. Alcohol has to do something for you before it can hurt you. Nobody ever rigged out on Pepsi or Coke I made.
But alcohol has got to do something for you now. What do you mean? What has it got to do for you? What it's got to do for you is something that the patient just takes for granted. He doesn't realize that there's only six or seven out of every hundred drinkers that alcohol does something for significantly, You know, I know what I drink to. In the last analysis, you could say that Alcoholics drink
to adjust their relationship to their environment.
Now a lot of people like us. I remember sitting in bars having martini with guys from work
and they'd have 1/2 of one and go home and I'd have two or three and sometimes more. And what that proved to me, they didn't have the troubles I had. I didn't realize martinis didn't do for them what it did for me. It didn't adjust their attitude to their environment. You know, it's, in fact, it's a kind of a funny thing in a a you hear people say I'm a social drinker. Maybe I'm just a social drinker.
Why can't I be a social drinker? Would you really want to be a social drinker? Really,
would you want to be one of those people who just drinking doesn't do it for?
Can you imagine how terrible it must be to be a social drinker? Have your back to the wall, the hounds of fate leaping at your throat. And you take a drink
and he goes.
And now you've got all the problems you had before, except you're getting dizzy.
And you hear those poor people say, Oh no more for me. I'm starting to feel it,
dummies.
Is that what you want out of your life?
Can you imagine that 93% of people who drink never experience what everybody tonight takes for granted? When you're backs to the wall and the hounds are at your throat again
and it doesn't go,
it goes
boomerangs and then.
Come on you household finance, son of a bitch, I'm ready for you.
That has changed. No facts, but it's changed my perspective.
In fact, we just can't. I just thought about a couple weeks ago talking to a couple of my babies about that. If you want to see really something sad, see Amateur drunks.
Don't see him if you want, if you can. But the worst night of the year is New Year's Eve. All them amateurs are out there drinking, and they don't know nothing about being drunk. And when they get drunk, they're a mess. I bet there isn't an alcoholic in this room who doesn't have at least 10 or 15 seconds from experience knowing they're going to throw up. You know, you
pardon me just a minute.
Them dummies don't recognize the signs. You'd be talking to one of them and you go.
They don't know when they're going to fall down. Everybody here knows that you just kind of give it
a them fools just fall down. They say things like I'm a little, I'm a little under the weather.
You drive my car home for me.
They don't even know the right answer is
it's my God damn car. I'll drive the God damn thing if you don't like a flock,
because when you're drinking you can handle it.
Do you want to be one of them social drinkers? Going
alcohol has got to do something significant for you before it can hurt you.
If it don't do nothing for you, it'll never do nothing to you.
One all right now. What's wrong with that? It's like alcohol is like instant therapeutics. Sometimes. I had a couple years of psychotherapy. I was in metaphysics. I read a lot of philosophy I can describe. I can discuss Kant and Schopenhauer and Nietzsche and I've never met any, never found any therapy yet that in two years can make you feel as comfortable as one double shot.
Now what's wrong with that? Jesus, man deserves a little help.
There's only one thing wrong with that, really, and that is it gets back to the old cruel thing about
let me just say something two or three minutes, right? I may talk a little over time, but Jack can remember at the end of his tape.
Let me Why are you human beings have conflicts? Isn't that a big surprise? I'm not giving you a psychology lecture that that's just true. The only time the human beings ever are treated as well as they wish to be treated when they're born, they're born with only one thing going for men instinct to to live, to stay alive. That's why little babies, you can put a bottle in their mouth
and they'll suck it before they've ever been taught to suck a bottle because they got to do it.
And little babies are self-centered, total self-centered little things, and they're born into a world where it's all given to them. But a little baby is hungry, he says. I
Somebody says nobody says why don't you get the job, you little puke? Yeah,
give him the bar when a baby's wet his pants, he says. Oh, and baby pooped his pants. Nobody says, aren't you ashamed? Yeah, and everything you want is yours and you're the center of your universe. And watch little babies go over and pull over the lamp and give us a look how strong baby is. He pulled over the lamp. You know, next year when he does it,
you know, but for a while it's great trouble that happened so young when you don't appreciate it because it's just my type of living. And one day every little baby, sooner or later, little child goes into a room or a playpen or a play yard or the backyard or a living room, and he runs across some other little puke that up till then thought he was the center of the universe.
And you hear little tiny voices saying things like mine.
Mind, mind
and the battle of life begins, and it never gets any better
because you suddenly begin to realize that my Basic Instinct is gratifying my wishes. And the world, that selfish, nasty place, is occupied with other things. And so you grow up and try to learn to see how little you have to give to get as much as you can. That's called maturing
of not showing your emotions,
learning the techniques. Instead of saying Dad, I want to use your God damn car, you learn the hypocrisies of life. Gee, Dad, you look nice tonight.
I'm so proud of you and mother.
Could I use the car?
All the little things. I love you, honey, I really do. I love you always
good. All the little hypocrisies of life to disguise your basic emotions of I want what I want
now. You'd think by the time you grew up, people wouldn't need anymore help. But a good ghetto. People have this all of their lives. The conflicts between what I can have and what I want now. I'll just give you a good example, right? Which we came up when Raleigh and I and Mary drove up here tonight,
We up here about three blocks. There was something there should be no need for in an adult community.
Big men, wealthy, successful men in Cadillacs and Lincolns and Fords and Chryslers come to that corner. And the city of Eureka has to say to them.
Now you wait and let these children have their turn for a while. Now it's red for you and green for you. Now you go for a while
because left of their own devices, even grown up successful men, it's more important that I get through that intersection than you get through it. So they got to give me a light like the dude greets. I can't think of a single law, federal, state, city. I never heard of a law of society or its legislatures that wasn't to or another
designed to prevent somebody or something
getting their wishes at the expense of somebody or something else who was unable to fight back. That's all it's about. Society is made-up of people who live in a tenuous situation of
I must not try to get what I want because I will be punished or I will lose face or whatever it is. But that's all it's about. And we will all go through life with conflicts because every it's to every human being that lives. It is slightly more important to me
that I survived and that you survived. Nothing personal, just that's the way it is
now. There's nothing wrong with that, but people have a lot of conflicts. There's a lot of conflicts in society and that's why there's maybe 300,000 people this week lying on psychiatric couches saying, doctor, why do I have these conflicts that they don't seem to have? Because every human being's at a disadvantage. They got to compare their inside against other people's outside. And you always look roar to yourself that other people look to you.
And that's why people
get into things that give them answers. And people bowl seven nights a week and people get in there and become workaholics and work 10 hours a day, seven days a week. Just they look good doing it, but it's another escape, just escape from the conflicts
people. We 7% of our hundred drinkers are among the most fortunate people in the history of the world.
I have a way to reduce conflict significantly, socially acceptably.
That's what alcohol does. It reduces conflict in the alcoholic.
It may bring it tomorrow, but it takes it away now. Now, there's nothing wrong with that. It's like having a magic answer except for one thing.
One thing, and that's this. If alcohol does something for you on a continuing basis,
you gradually lose the ability to use those emotional muscles as they were, which allows you to cope with the conflicts of reality. So by the time your answer gets to be a problem and you want to quit drinking, you are unprepared to face the conflicts of reality on a continuing basis.
And it boils down to this. I am ill adjusted to my environment emotionally
and sooner or later to maintain my sanity I got to take a drink or a pill or something. Now isn't that funny? You got a drink to keep your sanity but if you drink you're going to go crazy. You got no chance.
And that funny little disease is called alcoholism. It's composed of two things.
You have lost your ability to control the alcohol and a continuing basis.
You have lost your ability to control sobriety on a continuing basis.
No matter how you slice it or who you blame or it or them or her or old days or memories or what ifs. It boils down to this. Sooner or later I must drink. And when I drink, mostly I will be able to convince myself I'm not really an alcoholic because these emotions happened to me when I was sober.
And that's why this is a lethal and fatal and deadly disease. I see now that in 1975, alcoholism has been ranked to the number 2 killer of the United States. And I'm sure that if all the death certificates were filled out correctly, it would be #1 they still don't put alcoholism much on death certificates. You whenever you read the paper, somebody died a heart failure, you might question that
because that's what causes everybody to die, is heart failure.
The question is what caused your heart to fail? That's a nice winter.
Heart failure is not a cause of death. That's a symptom of death.
But the reason that's important to remember that is this.
If you think that somehow you're going to get sober
and you're going to grid a throw or you're going to stay sober if the conflicts will go away,
you're going to be out of luck. If you get sober and think, well, why do I still have this intermittent terrible pain and sobriety? It's because most people don't realize that is part of the disease. That's why we're here. If there were no pain and sobriety, there would be no problem with drinking as we wouldn't drink.
This disease called alcoholism is a deadly terrible thing. And the reason I want to mention all that, all those things I just mentioned is this.
So you will never ever stop and think that alcohol is a place for you to get sober in, because being sober is not the goal of a A Being sober is the doorway to a A.
It is living in sobriety, progressively less conflict ridden. That is the point of a A and that is why the actions and the therapies of AE are so vital. Now every once in a while you run across some old guy who's been around for a long time and he says things like Island summer, 20 years,
that I don't believe in the God damn steps.
And it's kind of hard to debate with that and take out a newcomer with it. He says, Jesus, he's been sober 20 years and he don't believe in the steps. Took me some time to think of the answer to that. The answer is, is that the way you want to feel when you're 20 years sober?
People that can stay sober with that much discomfort aren't as sensitive as I am.
I need more comfort than that,
and that's why it's important to start to understand.
And the thing that saved my life and changed my life was the idea that a A, the things you do in a A are not some sort of gratitude you do to a, A forgetting you sober. They are ways that over a period of time, will adjust your relationship with your environment exactly designed to do the same thing that alcohol is designed to do.
Except you're not liable to be arrested for driving while serene
you
you've not. Very many people get busted for comfortable and disorderly,
but sobriety is full of its ups and downs
and we try to ease them off. And no matter what anybody tells you from the podium, no sane person is comfortable all the time.
No sane person. I've only known one guy who was happy all the time. And here's the guy in the next bed to mine at Big Spring, TX.
He Just
how are you today? Five days, A fine day.
I used to envy that son of a bitch. How does he do it?
And it suddenly struck me, as long as he keeps me in that happy, he's never going to get out.
That indicates he's out of touch. Nobody's ever that happy
what you try to do here. The purpose of these things is for this
so little by little,
sobriety becomes
tenable, and then a little more bearable and then a little more bearable. Then you have some bad days where the bottom drops out, but you've got to stay sober. That through them.
Until you get to start getting a flash of comfort now and then. At first it's like right reading Shakespeare by Lightning Flash, you know.
But little by little,
the purpose of Alcoholics Anonymous is to enable Alcoholics whose psychiatrically and physically cannot withstand unsedated sobriety and help them to find a way to live progressively more comfortably
in unsedated sobriety. That's all it's about. Do not be deluded by these people who say, hey, we'll take care of your sobriety. Then you got to go to the brand next for your emotions.
A A has got nothing to do with your sobriety. A A deals only with your emotions in sobriety. That's all it deals with. And the one thing to remember is this, alcohol still does something for you. So if at any time you drink, the short circuit is back and then you got to go back and start over again.
So you never get well enough to drink because that's got nothing to do with the physical side of it. Alcohol still is the physical mixer,
so you can't drink and you can't stay sober. Nothing has ever been found to this day that it'll enable you to drink. There was briefly
up this hospital up in Seattle three or four years ago. They had a program where they could return Alcoholics to drinking, social drinking. And their executive director was an alcoholic who returned to social drinking and stood on the platform and said, despite what people tell you, you can return to soft drink. I am an alcoholic
and I was an AA, and now I've returned to social drinking and you take a drink. Jesus Christ.
I wanted to get his address. Not really, but they had to discontinue that program because they unfortunately, one of this man's moods eventually overtook him.
They had to put him away. One of the great cures I ever heard about an alcoholism is down at Loma Linda University outside of San Bernardino. About five years ago. They got a lot of national publicity. They found a way to stop Alcoholics from drinking when drinking was available.
They put a bar in their hospital in this ward and they'd offer guys drinks. Is there one little drink? The guy said yeah,
one other little drink. Yeah, only that time they give him a shot.
Little less ice than the next one, if you don't mind.
And eventually, day yesterday, they'd give these guys drinks and sometimes they'd give them shocks and sometimes they wouldn't. The guys got just like fawns and forest fires, you know?
Appreciate the guide. Come into the bar in the morning,
one little drink. No, I don't believe so.
They had 100% cures. Christ, they had juice all over. The only trouble was with their program that they discovered sometime later that most of their cures didn't last beyond the first bar where there are no wires on the glasses.
Because making you sick of alcohol doesn't stop it very long. Because eventually your emotions will overweigh your memories of what alcohol did to you.
That's what a A is about.
That's why, if you are new and are yet uncolored, you might stop and think. That's why it might not be such a bad idea to contemplate the steps of a A, because the steps of a A / a period of time when assiduously applied little by little, by weak, fallible pupils such as you and I,
altered the relationship of the patient to the environment and enables him to live progressively more so
more comfortably, more adjusted. Now every day is not a perfect day, but by God,
I'm a long way from that animal. I used to be, but I was at the top. Now I, you know, things are fine. Now I live in a home by the ocean. I when I was five years sober, the same wife and four kids moved to California and we've lived together ever since throughout. Most of them are grown up and gone. Now we have a little boy, 11. Incidentally, this may be my farewell talk in a A because tomorrow afternoon, 3:00, I have to take him out and give him his Boy Scout proficiency test and a rowboat on the ocean.
I can. Don't drown me, kid. I'm your daddy. I'm sorry I spanked you
when I was five years of birth, his medical corporation and a seven-year sober. I was in Hollywood and radio and television got some more plaques and awards. That was 10 years sober as director of public relations for large oil company. I was 15 years sober. I was director of marketing for a big publishing firm in Beverly Hills.
I got a home and a family and a job and kids, and
there's only one thing.
I had all these things the day I committed suicide in El Paso,
and I was just as sober as I am now tonight. Not as long, but just as physically sober. And the reason I committed suicide in El Paso is because both the university and the advertising agency felt my drinking and got out of hand. And they give me an ultimatum. One more drink and you're done. So I went on the wagon,
and I stayed on the wagon so long that I couldn't fight it off anymore. And one morning it was easier to commit suicide than to live sober.
And I was sober that day.
I was. I had all these things the day I hitchhiked out of Chicago in the middle of a Blizzard because I had just caused my best friend to commit suicide. I felt over one of my terrible behavior patterns. I had all of these things the day that my father came to me and my jail cell in 1950 and said, did you have a good time last night, son? And I said, not really, dad, but I'm going to straighten out. He says, I hope you had a good time because while you rob drunk, your little son died in his crib and I never want to talk to you again.
And these are memories you can't live with.
And The funny thing is that with the change of perspective, you can live with them and understand them. And I no longer feel a terrible sense of guilt for those kind of things. I can look back as though I'm looking at somebody else and see a poor, sick emotion rack guy doing the best he can with no alternative. He just got to stumble from crisis to crisis to crisis, shaking his fists against the heavens.
Let me suggest to you this,
there are ways to not drink. There are various centers. Now I'm not putting these down because it's different strokes for different folks. Before you go to get off alcohol and they give you pills instead that make you crazy only you don't smell anymore.
It don't seem to make much difference for people like us. Whatever gets me away gets me away.
Alcohol, they can say, well, Valium is not addictive.
I'll tell you something, alcohol isn't addictive either. To those 93 of 100,
Librium is not addictive to 93 of 100. But anything that will transform our relationship to our environment is death to us
because we will gradually atrophy in those emotions that we need to build up. That's why it's a conceivable you and I might think about this. The purpose of a A is that. So tonight, in a few minutes after I have a cup of coffee, I can walk out that door and I don't even have to look at the street sign. I don't care if it says Eureka, CA out there, or if it says
O'farrell St. in San Francisco, or if it says
Irve St. that's Dallas, or if it says Biscayne Blvd. And it's Miami, or if it says
Clark St. in Chicago or 52nd Street in New York or Burrard St. in Seattle, or or Vancouver or Barstow St. No, Claire, Wisconsin don't make a hell of a lot of difference.
I got to walk out there into an environment where I must reasonably expect to feel comfortable and be able to cope with the problems I find out there and most importantly, come to understand what causes the problem so I can change the 'cause that brings about those deadly effects, not only just in drinking, but in my emotional behavior.
I one thing I had difficulty with, and a lot of people do, is coming to return to God. Because I had such a strict religious training, I was pleased to discover a period of time, as my sponsor said to me, he says, kid, there's never any place in this book that says you return to God, that you never return to a higher power. It says something much more important.
You come to believe that a power greater than yourself exists.
And my first higher power because of my strict religious training, I could. I couldn't face the concept of God because if God existed, I was screwed.
And I came to believe in my sponsors, a higher power. And as a result of trying to please that old fool, I got secure enough to come to believe in a A and I came to believe in a lot of things I didn't think I could. And much to my surprise, over a period of time, I came to believe in God. And I have prayed to him. And I go home to Eau Claire, WI now. I'll be there again in a couple weeks. I'm there much more often than when I
lived on the other side of town. My parents and I are very close. They cry when I leave town now instead of when I come in, which is a switch.
Kind of fun to see the tears freeze to their old cheeks.
But
don't be so concerned about quote the spiritual side. Because first of all, you have to come to believe that the power here can help you. And if you can live in this world, you come to believe in what you can come to believe it.
I I've only had one moment in which I have reached spiritual perfection,
and that was in 1970. I'll tell you about that briefly, didn't. I'll sit down.
I was privileged 1970 to be asked to speak at the International Convention in Miami Beach,
and I guess ordinary would have been a big ego trip for me. But it wasn't for me because I'd been a slipper around a for nine years now. I'd been sober 12 years and it kind of was a tap that we accept you in our dumbbell.
And I spoke on July 4th and the morning speaker early in the morning was the guy that took me to my first a a meeting in Eau Claire, WI 1949. Long before I had needed it. I thought my last, the last speaker that night was my current sponsor in Los Angeles and I was the noon speaker on Independence Day. And it just touched me and I just was imbued with
Jesus. How lucky I am to have found this.
And I had a spiritual breakthrough like you never saw. And I came home determined. I'm never going to be cross again. I'm not going to let my emotions run away with me anymore. I'm going to put this program to work without any more of this hanky pank. And I just was. I just exuded love for all. And on Monday morning, I was going down to work
and I got on that Santa Monica Freeway
and I just, I had my rearview mirror
so I could see the road and me both, because I've never seen myself with this aura.
My dimple really danced
and I went under the San Diego Freeway and a little old lady in a Toyota came off that freeway on the on ramp
and about 70 miles an hour just missed me by an inch. Just A
and the new spiritual leader of the West Coast without even blinking an eye lowered the window and said, you crazy old bitch, and I've got that
you can do then is drive another mile and stick your head back out there. God love you
no longer the marketing director of this publishing firm.
I do now for a living. For Christ's sake, I run the Midnight Mission on Skid Row in Los Angeles
and it's I wasn't even going to take the job, but they guaranteed me such a significant decrease in salary, I couldn't turn it down.
It's not a, it's not an alcoholic treatment center. It is not an alcoholic rehabilitation place because I'm not smart enough to be an alcoholic counselor yet. I may be in 20 years, but I'm not now.
All we do is we run this big mission on Skid Row. It's the only mission on Skid Row, I think, in the world where there's no religious services, there's no required meetings, there's no required anything. We feed about 140,000 meals a year and we bed down 50,000 guys and
and it must be the only agency of its kind in the world that gets no will not accept any federal funds or state funds or county funds or city funds or church funds. Just It exists on public donations and has for 60 years.
And I go home at night. I feel maybe I've done something. And you think, well, Jesus, that's nice to help all those Alcoholics, but it isn't helping Alcoholics. It's helping broken men 'cause there's a great many men on Skid Row. A lot of people don't know this who don't drink at all, who are broken. Another wheels.
But it's kind of an interesting thing to me. It so changed my perspective. I would have bet my life again that I'd never be interested. I spent 15 years getting off that God damn Skid Row. What am I doing down there? Going voluntarily every morning, driving through Beverly Hills to get the Skid Row,
and I wouldn't even do it except it keeps me comfortable
and that's what it's about. I wouldn't suggest you run a mission because I don't know that's what should be done.
But I don't mind running a mission as long as when I'm running that mission, I'm not an AA. When I go home, I'm an A A and I go to my meetings and, and I don't try to convert anybody down there. We have 3A a meetings a week at night, but I don't stay for them. I I go home 'cause I'm not there as an A, A, a A enables me to be there to help people of all kinds, not Alcoholics.
But the point of the whole exercise is this.
You got to remember one thing,
the basic bottom line of Alcoholics Anonymous, why you should do things, for instance, like get a Home group, no matter how many meetings you go to, have one meeting you go to every week so you can start to belong, so you feel a part of things. Everybody in this organization is basically a loner. We got to do everything we can to feel like we're a part of things. That's why you maybe you want to get a sponsor and maybe do what he says even though you think you're smarter than he is.
And maybe you might even want to work these steps over a period of time and gradually make that emotional surrender so you don't have to be pretend to be so God damn strong you can exhibit your weakness once and for all. And on the result of that, start to get strong.
That's what it's about. I you may get the idea that I'm an advocate of Alcoholics Anonymous and I am. It's the only thing that I've helped. And sometimes people say to me, you don't know what it like to be sick like I am emotionally God damn it. I know what it's like to be as sick enough to kill yourself and be putting the insane asylum.
I'm just telling you that when all else fails, after you know all about a A, you might try doing it.
There's no cliche. They don't say much anymore. You said years ago. It's what you learn after you know it all that counts. And what you learn after you know it all is how to little by little, use it in your real life. You'll never become perfect. You'll never become wonderful. And people who tell you they become wonderful, in my opinion, are so insecure they're afraid to tell you that they're not wonderful.
What it does for you, it enables you, God damn it,
to walk outdoors into any St. in the world with your shoulders back and your eyes open and clear and inside and knowing that I can make it and knowing you. You have to start in by getting comfortable in here through painful times, and then get comfortable out there through painful times. And pretty soon you're comfortable in here and out there
and live through painful times.
And once you could do that, it's worth everything it ever took to get there. Thank you.