Mickey B. from London, UK Workshop on Step 1, 2 and 3, Part 2 of 2 at Road to Recovery Convention, Reykjavik Iceland

Now, no one's asking any questions, but if you want to, you're welcome to,

Yes. Where's the microphone?

How long have we got

good? My name is Hayden. I'm an alcoholic. I just want to show up to know how do you react to or how can you help me out with? We say if you have a sponsor comes to you and and, and he says he's not willing to work the steps yet. Do you just shy him away or say find you another sponsor or what?

How do I work with a sponsee who's not willing to work the steps? Yeah, look, very, very easy.

Most people don't want to do nothing, do they?

I mean they. The very word acceptance rankles with the fact that I'm not going to like it. I never have to worry about my acceptance if I get extra money in my pay. I never have to worry about acceptance if some girl comes over and starts taking her clothes off in front of me. You know, the very fact I got to accept it means I'm not going to like it. And most newcomers don't like the condition they're in.

But you see, look, I don't care what they do. Look, when somebody comes to me or when somebody doesn't want to work the steps or ain't willing,

I don't care. I have no idea. I carry the message to you, but for me,

so therefore there's no debt. I don't care whether you get it. I don't care what you do with it. I carry the message to you, but for me, so you can do it or not do it. I don't care whether they're willing or not. I don't care. I care whether they do it. If they don't want to do it, then have a party. Hey, don't worry me. I don't care whether they're willing. I don't care about

their feelings.

No one cares. I don't care. I tell them what we have to do. It's a program of action. It's in the doing. I got to act my way into good living. I can't think my way into good living. So if they're not willing, it's hey,

have a party. What are you doing with me? Don't talk to me. I don't give a shit what you do.

Sometimes I'm even stronger than that. I use 2 words. The second one's off.

OK, thank. Thank you. Any other questions are we going through? Yes, over there.

I've just been telling you. Yeah, give him the thing.

The question was, how do I work the first step with a newcomer? I explained to him what we've got to know in the book. I'm sitting down teaching people what it's all about. We're teachers, we're teaching people. We're passing on this message. We're staying sober, carrying the message that we have to learn. Most people, like in my group, they don't want to learn. Everybody knows everything.

I know, I know, I know, I know. I know. Yeah, but. Yeah, but I know. Yeah. But the mating call of arseholes, you know,

everybody knows everything. But that's what I do. Every Tuesday, I'll tell you, I sit down in my troops, we have a big meeting like this and I do a workshop like this and we go over it and we go over it and we go over it. What's in the book? I carry this message in our traditions. It says our common welfare must come first. And what our common welfare, whether in Icelandic, United States, Great Britain, China, Australia, Africa, where I'm going and India, you know, our Commonwealth are

the world is this message, not those messages, this message. See, And a lot of people are carrying those messages, which ain't this message. It's not this message. close enough? No, that ain't what we're talking about. So that's what we do. Now, if the guy don't want to stick around, it ain't cost me nothing because I'm 18 1/2 years sober.

See, I didn't get sober not doing this. I got sober doing this. So there's no debt involved because I'm carrying the message to you. But for me,

so it don't matter whether you get it or do it or what, because you've got allowed me to carry the message, stay sober, carry the message. That's what I do see and that's all there is to it. But what I try to do, like I've tried to point out to some people here today, is to break down some of the felonious beliefs and the false beliefs that we've got, because some of them are hard to get rid of.

When an old established idea is confronted by the truth, the truth has almost no effect on it.

And some of you have got really deep rooted ideas, things that you've heard,

you see, they are hard for you to break and and can't stay sober doing it. Excuse me. Can't say that's what I do. Yeah.

Anybody else?

Come on, you've surely got some more questions. See, if I asked you a question and you don't know the answer, but you're not asking the questions. That's dumb in it. Hi, my name is Torsten and I'm an alcoholic.

I was thinking about what Carl mentioned this morning and again what you mentioned about the spiritual solution. And it seems like when Doctor Silkworth, he prescribed spiritual solution to the problem. One of her doctors,

the doctors now seems it seems like they have taken over and they've said to to people, at least in Iceland in the treatment centres, OK, stay sober, go swimming, do something, buy a dog and maybe work the steps after two years and this is that's your opinion that will kill many Alcoholics. That's not this message.

Whatever message that is, it's not this message. So,

So if they've got something that works that's comparable to this, tell me, teach me, show me. I'll learn from you. I'll come to you, I'll ask for it. But if it ain't, I'm sticking with this. I know this works, and I can guarantee this, but I don't know that that works.

See. And so consequently, actually what happened was, is that

Bill, he knew what the solution was. What the solution was, was complete and complete and utter abstinence. That was the solution. Total and complete abstinence, No alcohol, drugs of any kind. Silk Worth knew what the problem was. Bill didn't know what the problem was. He just knew what the solution was. He had to totally Silk Worth knew what the solution, what the problem was,

which was the the disease of alcoholism, the two fold disease. When Bill and Bob got together, they came up with the third

part of the triangle, which was the programme of action. So Bill knew what the problem, what the solution was, Doctor Shortworth knew what the solution was, and Bill and Bob together came out with the program of action. Carl Young in in Switzerland. He had heard about a few obscure cases that had seemed to have recovered through a spiritual awakening,

but he didn't have a program of action. Bill and Bob got that. When they come together, the magic of Alcoholics Anonymous and Doctor Bob couldn't stay sober. He was a praying fool. He prayed up the wazoo. But he couldn't stay sober because he didn't do nothing. On June 10th, 1935 he got up off of his fat, lazy, alcoholic arse and did something.

Bill was a action man. Bob was a praying man.

Bill states over. Bob didn't till he got into actions. That's why this thing works if you do it, we don't care if you're atheist, agnostic, no matter what it is, we don't care. It works if you do it. It don't even matter about willingness. Willingness may be like a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down, but if you don't, if you have to take the medicine, you ain't got no sugar. The medicine still works if you take it. See, if you go to the gym and work out,

you get the benefit of the workout. It don't matter that you'd rather be at home getting laid.

See, a knowing God, knowing God, knowing a spirit doesn't look if I got something wrong with me and I know a doctor, knowing the doctor doesn't treat what's wrong with me.

So knowing there's a God don't mean shit unless I do the work. See. See, people think they can pray themselves sober. I got news for you. If you think praying's enough. Next time you're hungry, lock yourself in a cupboard and pray for a chili dog.

See what happens if God comes down and squirts one under the door. Let me know about it.

No, we pray as we take the actions. We pray for the strength and the grace to do the work necessary. But it's a action program. A/C TION. Any change to improve our nature. Change, CHANGE. Choosing honesty allows new growth every day. Because I got news for you folks. It is not OK for you to be who you are.

Now, therapy may say you're a child of God. You're a child to be who you are. Stroke, stroke, stroke, stroke. But I tell you it is not OK for me to be who I am.

Who I am drinks, goes into blackouts and comes out of blackouts in chains in front of judges.

It is not OK for me to be who I am. I got a change who I am by a program of action that I can't do myself

see. So that's why we have to do that. So if your little treatment centre says things like that, you know, when I went down to Australia, I spoke at the biggest mean. The first night I got in Australia, they asked me to speak and they didn't know what they were getting into and and I spoke about the big book. They went ballistic.

They went ape shit. This bloody Englishman, this Pom coming over here from America telling us to read the book. Screw you.

It went all over Australia about me. He said we bloody well get sober. Then we read the book. I said, why don't you turn that round, read the book to get bloody sober, you idiot. God damn kangaroo. You know, I know, you know, and and that's weird shit, man. That ain't our program. That ain't what we got and it ain't what's worked for over 2 million of us over the long haul.

They may have short periods of this stuff. It may sustain them for a while, But you've heard about it here. I've heard people, and I know people, long-term sober people that get so bloody wacky because they stop going to meetings or they're not working with newcomers or they're not working the program and they're just staying sober

and they begin to hurt. They begin to hurt so bad that eventually they get in so much pain they have to drink. Because sober, SOBER son of a bitch, everything's real,

see? And now I'm dealing with reality and I don't want to deal with reality. I want to drink so I don't have to deal with reality.

Sobriety, SOBRIETY, staying off booze. Recovery is everything to you.

We have to recover from this disease. It's not sufficient to just stop doing it. We gotta stop doing it and then do these steps and this work so that I don't do what I already don't wanna do. And in the beautiful book Alcoholics Anonymous, it says

elimination of our drinking is but a beginning. A far greater demonstration of our principles lies before us in our respective homes, occupations, and affairs.

Now, if you just stop drinking, you're at the beginning. Do you want to stay at the beginning like a shaky, smelly newcomer? I don't stay at the beginning. If that's all you want to do, just stop drinking. But I wrote a word called relationships. I don't know whether you got bad relationships or relationship problems up here in Iceland. Up there in the United States, we seem to get all funky in the relationships,

relationships, RELATIONSHIP.

Really exciting love affair turns into outrageous nightmare.

Sobriety hangs in peril. You dig it. Do you understand that?

Because I don't know. I got denial. It's a disease of denial. DENIAL. Don't even notice I am lying.

I don't notice when I'm lying. And I don't notice when I'm being lied to. Especially by a disease that tells me I ain't got it. You dig? And do you relate to the disease that talks to you? Who relates to the voices that talk to you? Yeah. No shit. You know the voices I'm talking about, right? The voices that just said to you. What voices? Those voices,

you know.

You know the voices. Some mornings you wake up in the morning and the voices are talking to you. They say, I'm glad you're awake. I've been waiting to talk to you,

Carl. You're a goddamn piece of shit. That's what you are. You're going to get fired today.

She's doing your best friends. You know that, don't you?

And these voices that drive me crazy.

Any other weird people here? Any weird people here? Weird 'cause I'm weird. I just do weird shit and I think weird and I act weird and I don't know what to do and I just weird. All my life people said what is wrong with you?

Why are you acting weird? What is wrong with you? You've got to work. You're bloody weird, you are.

And they would ask me what's wrong with me as if I knew

they would ask me what's wrong with me, as if I could give them an answer. What is wrong with you? Oh, actually I got a two fold disease. It's an obsession of the mind. So

allergies.

But today I do know. And here's the laughter. Look, this is what works. The language of the heart, the applause that we share with each other, the language of the heart. HEART healing, enjoying and recovering together. That's what we do, don't we? Alcoholics coming together to recover from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. I'm 18 1/2 years sober. I'm

certified insane.

I'm nuts,

but I'm sober, you know? I'm living proof that you ain't the sickest person in this room,

you know what I'm saying? And and you have to be careful of this laughter because his laughter, you know, they say if you're laughing, you're relating. And if you're relating to a sick bastard like me, there ain't no doubt about you.

You did

well, you know, we're we're gonna have a great weekend. And I thank Carl for his contribution. We're looking forward to to Mike Owen and for all you guys. And we're just the first of many. And you know what, keep coming back here. There's two sayings that internationally, throughout the recovery world, no matter where you go, Africa, Australia, north of South America, Iceland, England, wherever you go, all over the world, the two most prolific statements

everywhere is keep coming back one day at a time.

And guess what, folks? Neither one of those two statements is in the beautiful book Alcoholics Anonymous.

But please do it. You know that's what it's all about. Because look Alcoholics and Alcoholics look ALCOHOLICSANONYMOUS. Here's what it means. Look, a life centred on helping others lives in complete sobriety. Actions, not our names, yield maintenance of unity and service,

and that's all there is. There ain't no more than that. And we got it right here, right now. God bless.