Marilyn B. at AA Convention in Overland Park, KS

My name is Marilyn SB

Really, and I am an alcoholic

and I'm a member of Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous and Emotions Anonymous

and Overeaters Anonymous.

They just laughed at me, sure enough.

But I'm a member of any organization that has as a basis the program of Alcoholics Anonymous that saves my life and my sanity and hopefully will help me to share with you what little bit I have to share.

It's raining a little bit. In fact, I think probably when I submitted it to As the World Turns

they it was returned as unbelievable.

I'm telling you the truth, this is

the greatest round Robin that I have ever seen.

And if you agree with me,

it took some fine people and I know personally that are very fine and some great organizations never seen anything like a coax that's doing what they're supposed to do and go when they're supposed to go. And and my good old Indian time I'm flailing behind, but I have never seen anything to equal it, especially for a first one. And I do congratulate you.

I am so privileged

to be here. I belong here,

but behind this podium is it is different

and I'm not really any different from any of you. Never have been,

and probably never will be

quite where you are, because I found that it's really true.

Reputation strengthened and confirmed

and I thought that was the most dumb shit thing I had ever heard of in my life. I

it lured me to tears,

strengthens and confirmed. Keep coming back every night, every night. Read the book, cover the meeting.

I didn't even know it'll want to hear it anymore.

But I have a real swinging dry date

and it's taken many years for a lot of those things to have any real meaning to me. Today. I can honestly thank it's God that understands me, that repetition does strengthen and confirm just about the time I think I've had it all. I know it all, I've learned it all. There's nothing left to experience.

Better lookout. There'll be something new

in my life to experience and to work through. And it goes on and on and on. And I haven't grown the knees.

I still have the lowest model in this room.

That's why I'm standing on this mark.

And I wasn't going to tell that.

I was not going to tell you the infamy of me in my box,

but they made such A to do about getting it up here tonight.

You know, I just very quietly said do you have something for me to stand on? And I usually ask that and somebody scuffles around and gets a Coke case or some of those. I really can't see over the podium

and that may be better not.

I'll try that sometime.

I like eye contact and I like to look at your eyeballs and I usually have to stand on something.

Someone made a terrible mistake one time, in my opinion, and invited me over to the hole in the ground over in Amarillo, TX where they have that spiritual retreat every year and I'm not really known to be a spiritual speaker.

In fact, I just begged that I not talk on Sunday morning because folks kind of expect that. And,

you know, I got my own thing going for me. But somehow I don't know how to share that quite as well as this launchiness I've been through.

A lot more folks relate to me. I'll tell you,

ask me over to Amarillo and you know, it really is a wonderful place to go and and someplace I would really like to go today and be a part of.

But then I wasn't too old in the program. I couldn't figure out what in the hell they want with me over there. It was going to be so spiritual. So I sized myself up good, you know, for about a week. Think spiritual Maryland, think spiritual. I read everything spiritual. Big look had to say and on and on and on and on.

And of course I had to have this box thing on and they found one for me. And when I was introduced, I walked up to the podium and there was no box there. And I looked around and I was really frustrated because it was a tall podium and someone saw my frustration and made a mad dash over to the side to get my coke carton and brought it over to me

and wouldn't know I was coming up. Watch this

first thing came out of my mouth was like, well, I've been here 15 minutes and somebody's been stole my box

blonde.

But that time I figured I might as well just be myself. And that's the greatest privilege that I have today.

I don't have to play roles and I don't have to be a comedian, even though I enjoy that sometimes. I don't have to in order to survive.

I was delighted to go over and meet Elmer and I'm glad that this civil rights person was here to be a part of this particular

talk because

all of you that have ever heard me know that I usually mention that I'm the only blue eyed child born into a tribe of brown eyed Chickasaw Indians

and there was a lot of doubt about me right from the start. It ain't no wonder I was different,

but that's the way it was.

And through the years, I have

come to appreciate

my father having a head right on the Indian roll in Oklahoma and my grandparents and their parents.

And I told my my grandfather,

he's the one that was

had got married and he married the Indian squaw. And they weren't too well thought of in those days, the white men that came into Indian territory and picked up squaw and married her because it gave them all the same rights that the squaw had, whatever the hell they were. You know what, 5 paces behind the horse and that's.

But my grandfather really loved my grandmother and

they loved each other and their love was sincere and they lived very happy lives.

They were married when they were 21 through an Indian ceremony as well as civil, and they were each allotted 360 acres of land.

And at the age of 22, they sold every acre, mineral rights and all,

because they had become Christians in that Nazarene church.

And they goes every time of it to the church.

We have a College in Oklahoma City, the Bethany Nazarene College that was built on my God, and they've been money

I have. The heart is fit every time I drive by there today.

But, you know, they were perfectly happy with what they've done.

They loved it, and they loved the rest of their lives, just like so, you know, above poverty. They dedicated their lives to working with other Indians

and to help them find a better way of life and they were just happy as hog and sunshine with it.

Never imposed themselves on me or my beliefs.

Love you very much, just the way I was,

and I'll never forget that. I'll never forget that. My grandfather asked me when I was very young if I thought I'd be willing.

I said sure, because I had a lot of talent and skills and abilities, just like the Big Book said. I could sing and dance and do all kinds of funny things and entertain, and I went with them many times to those meetings. I'm very familiar with those that Nell mentioned this morning

and I went along, but I soon became very bored with that.

I'll never forget he was asking me though, could I make a lifetime work of that?

Please be interested enough to try to carry on some of our traditions

and traditions I knew nothing about. Character I knew nothing about. Well, I've been exposed to it, you know, as a Girl Scout for nine years. And I knew how to be prepared,

always was

born and raised, you know, in the front few of that church. I was exposed to every character building program that wasn't exposed to. But I knew nothing about character and principles. But I do remember that. He asked.

We are very proud Indians

and we have a lock pass on. Would you be a part of that? Would you see that our traditions don't die?

Would you say that our spiritual beliefs don't die?

And I said sure, anytime.

I didn't recall that until the last five years. I really hadn't thought about it much. I just remembered that Nazarene church and that college.

So I'm glad Alma here and I'm glad this civil rights personal is over here, see, because you have a perfectly

beautiful racial balance right here up here to front me and Elmer and all y'all.

I always kind of wondered about all these speakers coming from Oklahoma. And then I saw after I got here that old Charlie was going to talk and Charlie wasn't from Oklahoma. So I figured they knew what they were doing. I didn't have to go help them run that show

by telling them Charlie wasn't Okie and you can't hardly live in Oklahoma and not be some Indian.

It's clearly impossible to their navies anyway and not be some Indian

and oh brother me out that good old country boys who here as I want. If not, I want to be sure and tell him that I've been screwed by girl country boys more than any other kind.

You know, there's real good old country boys and then there are those who use that. It's a good old country bullet hunt. You get paid today

letter nail salon

not here tonight.

I love Buttermilk for it for being just what he is. But he was from Pawnee, OK

I'm saying we got more Indians in the state of Oklahoma than the rest of the United States put together. And there's a vacuum down there. But there's only 5 civilized tribes according to history

and I noticed y'all know that that now. And Cleaver from Warrika. We got funny names. I imagine y'all do up here, but

I'm from Shawnee and y'all got a Shawnee up here, but from the state of Oklahoma, which means Redman and everybody seems to kind of have it all together. You know, even Charlie talked about his Cherokee bride

and I thought, well, that makes it unanimous. You know, we're all from one of those spring sounding places, but I don't have it all together.

If they are from Oklahoma

and Shawnee is a tribe. I live in Pottawattamie County

and that's tried and I'm Kickstarter

and nobody ever heard of us. You know,

we at all time or child what one time we were all chocolates back there in Mississippi.

And you might know that when they started trying to haul us off down here in Indian Territory, there was a little group of about 1000 that didn't want to go. By God

they didn't want to go, and they were known

to be famous lawyers,

and they broke off from the Choctaw nation and called themselves the Chickasaw.

And the words of the thou means rebel.

I'm justifying everything y'all about to hear.

I am one of those. I have all the rights in the world to be a rebel.

I wanted my children to

carry on the traditions because those things once lost are gone forever. And I had become very interested in our culture

and way back there, when I first started to try to work the 11th step of this program, I started seeking, really

seeking all of the religion to try to find the principles that would dive with those of ours here in AA. And sure enough, there was some little something wrong with every one of them.

I couldn't take the whole thing 100%, so I stuck with the principles of a A and I found that the basic spiritual principle of my own Indian tribe are identical.

And then I am enjoying

exposing my children to

and my grandchildren.

Some of them are hooking on to it and some of them are.

I had one special one that did.

I never hated being alcoholic. You y'all

I never did say man I want to be an alcoholic and I grow up.

I didn't know I lost one for a long time

and Miss Charlie says we always the last to know. And then he said no, we know we're just the last to admit.

And sisters,

I believe now mentioned in her talk today that I so thoroughly enjoyed

saves my sanity one time and I will be forever grateful to the Al Anon.

I am so grateful for every person that was willing and is willing today

to be an allocating sponsor.

Maybe later you'll know how grateful I am for allergies,

but I believe she mentioned today that I. Alcoholism is a family disease and you better breathe 9 What

you know endings ain't right.

My grandmother went to her grave believing that it was our Indian blood that caused us this crazy

far back

and that we could, you know, we couldn't handle it. Well, nobody in my family could handle it, I'll put it that way. My entire family with the exception of my mother

or alcoholic

and didn't know how to do anything in moderation and I still don't.

But none of us knew I had two brothers that died of alcoholism or as the direct results of alcohol.

And there are three of us

gals who are now members of alcoholic phenomena.

My father was an alcoholic and I can remember. Should I do that? Because I don't want to found those.

I can remember when beer joints and bootleggers and some restaurants

and those places had big signs over the door that said no Indians allowed.

You remember that hour,

I say. We got them all fixed up

now what is What the hell y'all gonna do this?

Well, I did find out. You know, I have a wonderful husband I wanna tell you all about, but not a lot.

He's a brilliant geologist and I decided of at one time, if I married him, I get my everything back. Drop my drop barrel. My barrel can't pull my tank.

It was since announced about him that appealed to me too.

Hit. In addition to that, he's also

a commissioner for the Oklahoma State Wildlife Commission.

Man, they keep heating. If he can handle those wild animals out there, he can sure help me.

And he lovingly does.

I know that he loves me very much, but I've never quite believed that he was ever at any time in love with me.

I think probably he is and still was in Philly is in all

that time. He doesn't know what I'm saying.

So we don't have a lot of problems with our relationship. And I hear a lot about that in a A and it says as plain as day. The thing we fail to recognize about ourselves is our basic inability to form a healthy relationship with another human being.

And I said, who the hell has to have relationships? Yep. So I used to don't have any,

but in this program there is a solution

as to how to go about doing that. I never had a healthy relationship with anyone

simply because I was always #1

I don't know.

I don't know

amount that is age of alcoholism being hereditary.

The scientists and research people now seem to kind of believe that there's something wrong with our genes, and I wire designer one,

take their name off and put mine on

some things. I just can't give up. Ice. There you go. I just thought this morning, God, I wish I could be humble.

Oh my. I've always wanted to be one of those people like Neil who is so precious and and quietly go around doing good.

I don't quietly go around doing anything,

but I don't got none of that. It seems like

it's not in me somehow.

I'm not trying to think of, you know, that was nice of me.

Somebody said. It wasn't either.

I drank because I wanted to,

and it's just that simple. It didn't make any difference what kind of tag I put on it, what kind of justification of rationalization. I drank because I wanted to. I could not bear life on a day-to-day basis. I could not bear the reality of disappointments.

I could not bear the situation and the trap I felt I I had myself in because I didn't go to Hollywood like I supposed to.

And

then if I had a drink, I think, what the hell, I'd have to go to OU for four years to get a degree in drama. Four years. Then I'd have to grab Highwood and found drug stores through them, stuff my bra and wait for somebody to come and discover me. And that's going to take a lot of time

and they're really wanting to test in doing all that when you can just curl up in a great, big comfortable chair and have a hooker or two and.

Why are you waiting on to go and never have to get out of the car?

Nobody here at this conference in the committee or anyone I know personally, said Marilyn.

We want to clean up the story.

I went down Louisiana and they did.

They did. Oh Aronofsky, y'all know Aronofsky? They had the old dad, so they had both of us on the same program

and he's raunches me or raunchy. And we had a family call us in the room before the convention. And and there was, oh, there was also a wonderful medical doctor from Colorado who had about 18 years sobriety and Aronofsky now far about 8 years old. You know, there's nothing like eight-year wonders,

and this guy came in, he said.

We don't have any committees down here.

I am also body down here than anybody else

so I chose y'all to come

and I want you to please if you will try to clean up your story and if you will don't use any four letter words.

William Louisiana are trying to upgrade the reputation of Alcoholics not

and after all, he said we have ladies down here.

Well,

the doctor was OK,

you know, they're not senior dad

and whisked it around and fretted about that and the doctor and all of his wisdom said don't let that affect you.

Do your fame, be yourself.

And sure enough, we did allow it to affect us. No all day talks fast anyway. He talks fast. He couldn't understand the word, he said,

Burning. And it's been set out.

He really did. And I allowed it to affect me.

I didn't feel like I was being me,

but the good doctor saved it all.

We didn't tell what had happened, but he did. On Sunday morning he got up and introduced himself and he told just exactly what had happened to us

and you can imagine the shock and the hush

over the conference, he said. That man asked us not to use any four letter words

and he said, I pray to God that he didn't include the word love

because that's what I intend to talk with you about this morning.

And he saved us all.

Well, in my young life, there was some four letter words that I hated a lot worse than those that Mickey Mouse all over when your kid calls him, walks in, you know, calls you, one of them mothers

cleaning it up.

There were some words full of words that absolutely made me want to puke.

I couldn't stand them. I just couldn't stand to hear them

and they were like Cook

and wash

and dust

made me sick

and I didn't know why

I didn't know what I didn't know why I couldn't be a wife like otherwise

and be happy about it.

Well, I already did because I should have been Hollywood, you know,

I couldn't talk to that. But I didn't want, you know, I I couldn't be a mother like other mothers.

However, mirror Polish and my kids shoes,

you know, make them white and shining and white socks. No, you know, I'd rather grab a jug of wine and go park and stay all day. And last kids. I've been good mothers as far as I was concerned.

I couldn't stand that role that had been assigned me. That's why I came into this program with a mistaken idea that I always wanted to be a lady

and I want to be a lady.

Really and truly wanted to be was a woman

and I found some ways as to how.

Now I could put on pretty good shows.

Sit on any barstool

and a lady would walk in

and she would even have an escort

and she had on nylons and high heeled shoes and maybe a little fur thing and look clean and neat and have pretty hair that shine. And I was down my end of the bar on my stool and my territory and my jeans and barefooted and hadn't bothered. Comb my hair in a few days

and I smell good

living the folks still serves me. But I look at her and I think to myself,

see it,

you know ha ha ha laugh of slaves. Look at that broad.

I've had all that, I've had all that Country Club, bridge club, PGA, they'll ever get thrown out of PTA. I just

then let's start having PTSA. I didn't even have a chance because all the kids understood me. See, those parents and teachers didn't. I've had all that. How dull. How drab,

how boring, how pointless, how silly.

And look at her, man, she thinks she's hot shit

and I just tear to pieces. Yeah, I've had my lungs, I've had high heels, I've had hairdos, I've had fur coat.

But I turn around to whoever had the nerve to sit by me. So I'll tell you one damn thing, Herman.

I'll bet you the next drink I'm a better lady than she is.

Yeah, well named out about that.

Greatest shock I've had in this program was to find out,

but I just kind of mediocre.

Is this so many tricks?

My greatest consolations were the funniest thing.

I'm glad that Charlie talked about bottoms tonight

and that AA is for everyone if they choose

and you don't have to be faced down puking in the gutter like me.

If I had another dime, I did. I'd drunk

not about my mind.

IAEA score, everyone. And today I know what a bottom is

because Charlie's been a friend of mine for a long time and his Cherokee bride.

If those people let because of finances and because of material things

that can come into this program and stop drinking alcohol have my greatest admiration

bums like me.

You know, I really didn't have any choice

and I'm John still had one.

But a bottom, to me is something that happens to you on the inside,

not exterior circumstances, Something that happens down here in your gut where you live

and go through every kind of treatment in the world. You see, I am so damned old that a treatment center was unheard of

when this thing happened to me.

State member institutions weren't taking Alcoholics. They weren't allowed.

I found that you, an alcoholic, got thrown out, so he had to con somebody into committing you as a something or other, a potential suicide. And I was, you know, I know to kill myself trying to kill myself.

There, there are a lot of things that I missed.

I miss treatment centers and I missed some of the new policies that I hear today that new people accept as a part of this program. Unless I'm there.

I still believe a lot.

I hope someday to be an elder statesman,

like those who put this thing together here quietly and with humility, and did it right and it came out great.

But right now, I guess I'm just a bleeding beacon

and I don't expect everybody to work this program the way I do. I wouldn't even dream of having you work it the way it works for me because you are as individual or personality as your fingerprint

and this program allows for that.

We can sort of do it your way and it works for everybody,

but if they tell me, I could till you make it hell out of face to myself, right on out the door.

However, the greatest calm and manipulator you know, nobody could be me anyway. It was the only way I knew how to live.

And I hear people say, well, I ain't hurt anybody but myself,

fine, yes, I'm going to spend the rest of their lives making amends to themselves.

But I heard everybody and I really didn't. I say that without without egoism.

You know, if you breathe air and sat next to me, you were harmed.

Otherwise you wouldn't have been sitting next to me

and I couldn't use you. I didn't have anything to do with you. I continually saw the people I could use and con and manipulate. It was a way of life that was essential for me. I know about that master that Charlie mentioned.

I'm very familiar with masters. I've had many masters.

When I died, all I could die.

When I'd hurt all I could hurt. When I'd cried,

all I could cry.

Then I hit the bottom and it was something that happened in here

because I went off straight.

I had nothing.

There was nothing left of me. Nothing.

I'd abandoned my children.

I let my husband. I left everyone that loved me and cared for me

and gave a damn.

I left them all to go pursue

the master that I'd found, and when that master wasn't around, I had another one.

They don't know that you don't have to think you can chew a drink.

I discovered that

when I couldn't get alcohol, I could usually manage to find some some drugs that would substitute.

And would take the place of and I used them all.

I've had upers and Downers and rounders and rounders

and all the things

that the government says is our biggest problem.

And yet alcohol still remains the number one drug problem in our country, the most drug oriented country in the history of our nation. And alcohol still #1 drugs in use today.

I was in psychiatric wards like everybody else. I went to strength. Now what about to tell them what I dreamed last night

was personal?

One their fault. They couldn't help me.

It was mine, incapable of being honest with myself, much less anybody else.

Medical doctors could just give me some pills and say they just didn't. Add in that

when insurance runs out, then you hit statement institutions and you know you get any way you can.

I love psychiatric wards. I just love them pulling out insurance. I was on top of the world.

They really kept me comfortable. I got too high, they bring me down, you know, I get depressed and they hook me up and had a nice fella talk to about 20 minutes, you know every day

at to not tell anything to but just chat with and met the nicest thing My mother always said you don't need nice people now and go to church and I got news for her. You know, I mean, nice people go to psych ward.

They really are nice folks. You know the best bridge players I ever met right there.

A friend of mine that I've had in the program for many years was in psychiatric board and he agreed with me and we played bricks together once in a while now over at the club. And

he told me that he cut his throat and was sent to the psych ward, you know, and was in terrible pain most of the time and all bandaged up, you know, but he was wanting to do something to get his mind off these problems and this pain and, and got up before some and sat down at the table. And one little girl didn't ask how many cards do you deal? But she did even worse than that. She said. I sure hope you all don't play cutthroat.

I can't stand pain. I never could stand pain

of any kind and if there is any way to avoid pain and avoid I'm dying. See that's easy.

Litter couldn't stand the pain

and I had to get away from it.

So when the pain was more than I could bake

and my masters no longer served me,

I wound up in a state middle institution, in fact the only one in the country that would accept me.

Clancy from high in the Sky.

Alma Mater,

the Big Springs, Texas State Mental institution.

And I think I'm here today probably to tell you that it doesn't make a bit of difference where the hell you are,

whether you're in a $5000 a day treatment center in a hospital, or if you're in a treatment center paid for by the government and all of us taxpayers,

it makes no difference. Or if you're in the basement of a statemental institution. If you're ready, you're ready. And if you ain't,

it's just that simple because I've been in mental institutions before and I had fun till they threw me out.

I was in no physical condition to be thrown out

and I'm not any big heavyweight right now, never have been, but at that time I weighed 60 lbs.

The medical master said I have the insides of an 80 year old woman

and it was not likely that I would survive physically and if I should by some chance

I would never function again in society mentally.

They were convinced my brain was gone

and any God that I'd ever heard about in my life

ever

had certainly better be dead as far as I was concerned,

because I had scars on my knees. And somebody finally wrote that song for me.

I had scars on my knees.

I'm saying God help me out of this one.

Not for keeps, but this one

somehow another I managed to survive. And these steps that are on this wall up here to me are not steps like stairs. They all go in a circle. Now to be in a circle, maybe that's what that circle store on the emblem, hell I don't know. But for me, they're in a circle because step one starts with step 12.

I was in a withdrawal award for five days and nights

and I didn't know reality from from the fantasies and the hallucinations

and there were two people in that room with me,

strangers round the clock for five days and five nights.

Now that was the requirement of the hospital. I learned later and later when I was about ready to leave, I said once I hallucinating, I know I did a lot.

But were there two people sitting in straight back chairs over in the corner every time I open my eyes? And they'd be different people. They weren't. They weren't like a buttermilk horse.

They, they were different people with different faces and different clothes that they were sitting there

and they said yes, there were people in the room with you. They volunteered to sit with you an 8 hour shifts round the clock for five days and nights

and I said who in the hell would do such a thing?

I, you know, in all my tribals, I had never known anybody that would do that on a voluntary basis.

And I was told that they were members of Alcoholics Anonymous and had driven from a little town about 40 miles away.

They had never seen me before, nor had I ever seen them.

And the loudest message that I've ever heard in this program came to me in stark silence.

They're being there screaming at me

now and we don't believe you're not going to live. We all believe you won't function in society again.

We don't believe God is dead.

And for the first time in all those stupid, sickening, revolting, drunken years,

I saw a ray of hope.

I saw

a seed planted.

They never asked me to believe anything they believed,

never mentioned it. Their being there was love

and I've never seen that before.

Thought I'd clean it out, but I've never seen that before.

And they said you don't have to believe the way we do,

Marilyn, Can you believe that we believe this? I said, are you kidding me? Been here. You've been the ones that volunteered. Of course I believe you believe,

and they took all my hand and they've not turned loose of it yet.

The only thing they ever asked of me was to be willing to stick out your other hands

if somebody else wants what we've got.

And I've gone through all kinds of stages in this program

that everybody seems to go through

and their learning experiences and sometimes, most times painful. I hate for pain to be the touchstone of spiritual growth. I hate that.

That's it, that's the way it is.

Me you could never say in pain today. I can honestly tell you that I am grateful for adversity.

Not thrilled to death and not high as a kite, but I'm always grateful for adversity because that's the only way I learn. I still have to be backed into a corner and this God that I understand and seems to understand me knows that.

And about the time I think what the hell else is there left for me to do? I've experienced everything there is to experience. Wham old

and I'm going to have an opportunity to learn some more.

I am here to report to you that we don't ever learn it up.

I've learned more in the last five years than I did the previous 11

simply by remaining

open minded. Light from the start,

honest with myself like right from the start

and willing like right from the start.

I have a son that went to Vietnam and I was sober. Everything in the world has happened to me since I've been sober. Now remember what happened bad when I was drunk it didn't really matter. I I heard some research folks say the other day that the two most painful

pains that we can experience as human beings,

number one is child birth #2 was kidney stump.

And I thought, bullshit,

they don't know about us

and that we heard harder

and we live harder and we cry harder and we love harder and we do everything harder because we're extremists.

Moderation is the key. Moderation is the key. And I don't have that pendulum swinging right yet. You know, I still have to go all the way the other way before I can ever get back to some degree of moderation.

And then I thought about what they said and the reason the pain of childbirth is not remembered by women. And you ask any mother and she'll tell you, yeah, this guy has that. Don't remember the pain. And that's because the pain is bringing about something productive.

What can you do with a damn kidney stone?

Non productive,

but childbirth. Yes,

so productive and so wonderful and so glorious and so magnificent and miraculous that we are willing to turn around and do it again

and again and again.

The God that I understand

made sex a pleasure,

tried to tell me that was to propagate the earth,

but that never occurred to me.

But I do remember the childbirth and the pain. I don't remember. I remember what came out of that

and I remember that my children were

not what they were supposed to be.

If I was to carry on the traditions,

here came this cotton headed thing

with blur eyes in mind.

I told you Geronimo had blue eyes in us. He did, man. He got a lot in common.

I had two toe heads

and they look like me, didn't act like me, walk like me or talk like me.

Why did Matt 10 years and forgot everything

Clinton birth and gold and I'll ask

and I had my child.

I had my log chicks so Indian

any idea for black has shiny straight hair and it was OK because they had my blue eyes.

But this was the one I would teach.

This was the one that would carry on the traditions from my grandfather

and he picked it up and he loved it.

We came into this program together,

you see. I took him with me every place that I went. I only abandoned the Co heads and the wide eyes.